Holiday - to rebook or let them go?

My husband was referred for an urgent colonoscopy (in case of cancer) two days before I was due to go to China (trip booked with sister). My insurance paid for all of it within days. There's was no way I would have left him, plus his GP said I was needed for the day after the colonoscopy just in case. How on earth can your husband consider leaving you? You need someone with you. If you're spaced out on pain meds, that's not a sign you're over-reacting, it's a sign you need someone with you. (Also, if the three year discrepancy is down to pain meds, another sign of her current weakness).

The flights she said have been booked for three years

Let them go . You can recover

In the peace and quiet. See if your insurance holds up for you snd start saving to go agsin.

Yep, so something doesn’t stack up because in the opening post she says that they saved for three years and the holiday has been booked for a year.

Just asked DH and if we had been going to Disney he wouldn't have gone without me.

In OP’s opening post she says that they saved for three years and the holiday has been booked for a year. In updates she seems to be saying that it’s been booked for three years so something doesn’t stack up.

Not fishy - untrue. It is impossible to
book flights more than a year in advance and inexplicable why the insurance would cover everything except for the flights.

And not for £250 per person including luggage.

My DH and DD went on our big holiday last year without me. I came out of hospital on the day we should have left. However, they had my blessing and I stayed with my parents to recover.

We got my share of the holiday back through the insurance (minus the cost of the GP letter and the excess).

But, I agreed. In fact, I suggested it and I had alternative care. You don't. The fact he has unilaterally decided your fate is not OK.

“And the divorce came from nowhere.”

OP, he’s going to go without you so get booked into a convalescence home. Make sure that all the medical personnel know why you are on your own and that he intended you to lie for him.

Once you are stronger, get the wheels of the divorce in motion.

He’s a fucking monster and you deserve better.

You can't even book flights 3 years in advance.

Cancel it, divorce, then take the kids yourself.

If that was his first option without looking at all other possibilities he is incredibly selfish!

I would definitely misplace his passport a short time beforehand if my DH tried to go through with this kind of shit. Of course, he wouldn't and the kids wouldn't.

What a shitty DH you have. I was diagnosed with breast cancer and we had a trip to Disneyland Paris booked and a trip to Turkey kids were 4 and 7 at the time. The last thing any of them would have wanted was to go without me.
It took a little time, but we managed to get the money back for DLP and then moved the turkey holiday to the next year.
I really hope you have a good support network around you as I think you have a DH problem. If he does go away, I’d take that time to decide what you want, if anything, from the relationship.

She did.

Yes she did

**yeah we are UK. We booked the flights 3 years ago and we fly to a different place in USA, have a layover and fly the next day. With one of the smaller airlines too so probably why it was so cheap.

I’d be rethinking the marriage if he goes.

if you have insurance that will allow you to reschedule or receive a refund they shouldn’t go. if you are going to lose the cost of the holiday they should go without you.

OP didn’t say they booked three years in advance, she said they saved for three years and the holiday has been booked for around a year.

I really don’t think he’s telling you the truth, that would concern me!

I’d try and speak with the travel agent and see if they have any suggestions or can pull any strings. If they are unable, I would speak to the holiday insurance.

It is a bit of a stinger, as you’ll be feeling crap to start with, but a bit of time at home to recover with no husband or kids might turn out to be quite nice, unless your going to need them around for support/care.

sending you lots of well wishes.

Your husband sounds dreadful and selfish. He knows you will need some help and doesn't seem to give a toss. I could have some sympathy (not very much but some) for his point of view if cancelling meant losing all the money you've paid but you have travel insurance. Just cancel, get your money back and book another holiday when you're better. Or put it towards a divorce.

Your travel insurance should cover the flights as well as rest, regardless of whether it was booked as a package.

You can't book flights 3 years in advance. And even if you could, there's absolutely no way that you can get 4 return flights to the USA in August for £1000, unless he's put avios/airmiles towards it.

I would be asking to see all the booking confirmations. Hopefully he has definitely bought travel insurance because some of the other things he has told you about this holiday do not add up.

So not only does he want to go, he wants to leave you alone to recover from surgery and lie to the hospital about you being there alone?

I'm so so sorry OP. This thread has broken my heart tbh. I would tell your husband (not DH, he certainly isn't bloody "dear") that if he doesn't rebook then he can expect to find himself without a wife when he gets home.

Going on your dream holiday without you, when you have travel insurance and can easily move the holiday, is bad enough. Going against medical advice and lying to the hospital to leave you alone and not wanting to look after you is just terrible.

Honestly if he does move the holiday, I'd leave him once you get back anyway. He sounds selfish and if he doesn't want to take care of the person he's meant to love when she's poorly and recovering from surgery then he doesn't deserve you.

Sending big hugs, I hope your surgery goes well 💐

I can't believe what I'm reading here. He's a horrible man, how's the marriage?

You can’t book plane tickets 3 years in advance….something isn’t right here. No airline releases flights that early.