AIBU to want my own bedroom after years of sharing?

I know exactly how you feel! I treat our main bedroom like that on a weekend while DP is watching racing or whatever. But late nights would be better!

I have my own room. It is utter bliss. My DH was a bit hurt/offended at the start but he’s used to it now and sleeps better too. Our sex life is fine too. Do it OP. You won’t regret it

I moved out, supposedly temporarily, to the spare room after an operation but never went back. It turned out that both DH and I preferred it

I moved into another room at covid lockdown because I had a lot of trouble sleeping and also having very weird vivid dreams (I know a few people who had the same re: dreams). I just never went back because eventually we found we were sleeping so much better/not waking each other when getting up for the loo or to potter when sleepless. We're both happy with this and have no plans for divorce:)

My husband sleeps in the spare room since our kid arrived as he is a bad sleeper and he likes it better there. I do sometimes feel rejected as he doesn’t seem to need any cuddle time ever and I always have to instigate it, but he’s also messier than me and it’s actually nice to have my own room and just invite him in when I want him lol! It’s great to spread out and not be disturbed if he comes to bed later. It’s defo not the beginning of the end but make sure you reassure him about that and make sure there are plenty of hugs and physical contact if he likes that kind of thing.

I’ve my own room and my own massive bed for the last 10+ years of marriage. It’s wonderful.
we visit each other for sleepovers. But we have our own space.

I’m counting down the days till one of mine moves out so I can have my own room. I frequently fantasise about how I’m going to furnish it! I’m the only person in my house without a dedicated space, and consequently all my stuff is all over the place - lots of hobbies! I don’t think I’d actually sleep in it very often though.

Thankfully both DC are adults so only a matter of time!

I'm sure that's how all married couples who have separate bedrooms started out.....

I don't personally. But that doesn't mean how you feel is wrong. You're entitled to want your own space. I'd point out that your children have their own rooms, why shouldn't you have the same luxury?

20 years married, separate bedrooms is the reason why!

I must be in the minority here but I can’t imagine not wanting to sleep with my partner. He snores and fidgets but I sleep better with him than without. What impact would it have on your sex life too?

DH and I sleep in separate bedrooms. It's kind of evolved for various reasons but so prefer it to sharing a room.
We get our own space and can sort bedtime/wake up to suit ourselves.
Means I can keep my space calm and tidy and he has to sort his own mess out!!

Yes and I have my own bedroom. I love it. I'm introverted and being able to retreat to my place any time I need my space is heaven. Go for it but make sure you explained why it is important for you and that it is not about getting away from them.

My partner is a night owl, people may think this is weird but I love falling asleep by myself, it doesn't mean we don't spend time together, but I shoo him out the room when I'm ready to go to sleep as he won't be sleeping for hours.

I don’t want a separate bedroom as I enjoy sleeping together but with my ex we had our bedroom + a room each and it was great.

It’s not an affordable reality for me anymore but for anyone who can, I strongly recommend it.

I think I’m the outlier here! I’d hate separate bedrooms! DH does have some occasional snoring issues and he tosses and turns a lot due to his fibro so if I’m struggling to sleep I take myself off to the spare room that I’ve made cosy and girly but I prefer to sleep together. I’m away from home 3 nights a week and stay at my parents and I always find I sleep better at home with DH (except when he snores! But I sleep well in the spare room too)

Edited to add- we’ve only been together 5 years so I may sing a different tune in 30 years time!!

I'm currently single and LOVE the bliss of my own bed (and house, actually). But I'm interested in the number of men versus women who suggest the 'own room' thing. Because it does seem to be predominantly women who suggest separate rooms (and often because of snoring) and men who protest against it. Is that right or am I just reading biased information?

Because I think women get 'touched out' and if you add menopausal heat and a restless partner, I wouldn't be at all surprised to find that this is something most women would prefer but men would rail against.

DH and I have had separate rooms for years. It was actually his suggestion because he was so conscious of me having a disturbed night due to him snoring like an asthmatic water buffalo and and getting kicked because of his restless legs! Plus we have totally different habits that aren't compatible; I like to go to bed quite early and read and I like silence and darkness. He stays up late and then likes to watch tv in bed and will fall asleep with it on.

It was honestly the best thing we did and I love sleeping on my own (well, with the dog who is much better behaved than DH😁) I'd never sleep with another human ever again!

I have my own living room and it’s fab. When I move in a few years time I may have my own bedroom too.

This is true. We actually got married after we started sleeping separately

Yes me and my husband sleep separately but it’s still his room really

I don’t think the bedrooms were the cause. I’m more likely to get divorced from a snorer/ inconsiderate sleeper than if I’m supported to get good night sleep.

I’m decorating my own bedroom as we speak. It’s ensuite as well so the bathroom will be decorated spa style. My own corner for good sleep and no boys items 🤣