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AIBU?

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DH trying to force oral

256 replies

whyohwhybrainrots · 27/07/2026 17:36

Ok before I write this I know there will be a lot of leave him comments but this isn’t why I’m writing it I just needed to rant! We have a lot of other things going on at the moment which would make leaving impossible currently. It’s something to think about down the line.

So me and DH were having some ‘us time’ the other night which is very rare (few times a year) due to DCs health needs and that taking up lots of our time. I was already not really in the mood due to him asking in a vulgar way (“do you want to Fxxx”) but just let that slide. He then gets on top and whilst he’s on his knees and I’m lying down he kind of shuffles up the bed and says “oh just a little suck first” I said no and tried to pull him back down to kiss etc, he then kept saying just go on only a little bit and kept laughing and trying to get his penis closer to my face. At this point I had said no twice, I then sat up, pushed him back and very forcefully said “I said no!” . He then acted like it hadn’t happened and we carried on.

not that it matters but I’m a survivor of child SA and so I can get triggered easily by things like this. I just think why do men feel like women would want to do this all the time, like it’s their right to make us? I’m sick of men thinking women are just objects to satisfy them. How would he feel if I’d done the same thing demanding oral when he said no?

like I said this isn’t about leaving as that isn’t currently possible, it’s just a rant about how men think that women can just be used!

OP posts:
Bringemout · 27/07/2026 17:53

All of that was at minimum disrespectful, honestly I would have felt like I had been assaulted. Are you ok OP?

lady725516 · 27/07/2026 17:52

He doesn’t respect you or your boundaries. He sees your body as a toy that he can use.
i would stop having sex with him and then leave when possible.

Lentilcakes · 27/07/2026 17:51

Grim. Nothing as sexy as a dick in the face 🙄

iamnotalemon · 27/07/2026 17:49

I don’t think you should blame yourself by ‘being triggered easily’. He sounds awful.

GrumpyPanda · 27/07/2026 17:45

Eeeeeew.

hoopieghirl · 27/07/2026 17:44

You said NO that should have been the end of it. It is a gross betrayal of trust from your husband and he has no respect for your boundaries. I know you said you can’t leave but I think you may need to reconsider that if his vile behaviour continues .

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