AIBU to not let my 17 year old daughter go to the cinema at this time?

I don't advise her to get medication and there is not a service for providing prescriptions on Mumsnet.

I do advise that if you feel anxious about your very nearly adult going to the cinema without you, you should consult your GP and follow the treatment she recommends.

Advising others to get medication as you don’t agree with them is at best highly irresponsible.

@Wooky073

you are right. OP could maybe go sit in the same film a few rows behind her daughter to make sure she is ok, couldn’t she.

oh and women and girls should not be out running

Im glad to know you are the voice of the people thanks for letting me know.
They were simply ideas and suggestions to allow the teen to be able to goout and also feel safe. The suggestions note that they are 'with consent' so if the teen does not agree then its not a problem. I did not suggest she texts her mum if she wants a wee - you are exaggerating for effect to manufacture outrage and justify insults.

Goodness my boy was working in a restaurant and coming out at midnight twice a week at that age. He also had many parties he’d go to. Only reason I’d ever be annoyed was having to collect him all the time. But that’s just part of having a teen. Cinema seems very tame, let her go.

Sharing a location is sensible. Having an AirTag and a location on a phone is overkill. Getting out the car to wait in the cinema lobby and having her call her mum to tell her what screen she is in is absolutely ridiculous overkill for a near adult. Would you also suggest that if she goes for a wee at the Cinema she texts mum to let her know and let her know which cubicle she’s in and when she gets back to her seat? Any parent having that level of control and protectiveness with a 17 year old is the one with the serious problem. It’s not them being tracked by 1 device people object to.

I dont understand the flippancy of some of these posts. Age 17 is a teen not an adult. Sure it would be great if women and girls were safe walking around and doing their own thing evenings and night times but that isnt the society we live in. Even as an adult a lone female faces many risks when out on their own - even in the daytime. Even female joggers face harrasment in the daytime and there has been some research on this which found almost seven in ten women report facing abusive or harassing behavior while exercising. Its all good and well encouraging freedom and removal of all thoughts of safety with someone else's teen daughter on the basis that 'I was fine'.

There are inherent risks in getting public transport and a female walking alone (adult or child) particularly at past midnight. Plus public transport often ends at particular times. Ive been stranded before now trying to get home. The folk encouraging the OP take risks and push her teen on to be independent and not consider the risks is IMO irresponsible. I say this as someone who has been sexually assaulted on public transport as a teen more than once and in broad daylight.

Devices and apps can help with safety such as this app and sharing locations: https://walksafe.io/blog/womens-safety-guide-to-walksafe/

https://www.imabi.com/blog/walking-alone

Not true according to the 'Besafe' website amongst others. Unfair to blame the mother for taking safety seriously IMO

The advice is the mother deals with her anxiety and doesn’t put it on to her daughter! Her anxiety not reasonable for a 17 year old, deal
with her own issues.

The stepping stones you advised should’ve been stepped on long before the age of 17!

Many adults also share location on devices with consent. If they don’t consent no problem. it’s just suggestions for a mum worried about safety and stepping stones to allow freedom whilst keeping safety in mind as recommended on various websites.

Yabu she is 17 and you are collecting her from the cinema. You cant wrap them in cotton wool - she is almost an adult

I think what’s important here is you don’t let your own issues impact her, I don’t know if it’s anxiety or what you’ve got going on, but there is no risk in taking an uber or licensed taxi at midnight, and I understand you wouldn’t but it’s important you don’t let your fear restrict her, she’s nearly an adult,and we need to teach them responsibility and let them fly, not teach them fear, anxiety and paranoia as we suffer from it.

glad you’re letting her go, I’d let her cab home. You need to build her confidence not stifle it,

I get it OP. I worry a lot about DD being out late. Can you get her a taxi or can she sleep over at the friend's so they're getting home together?

No, because you lob personal insults at people you don’t agree with

The mum is clearly anxious about safety hence this is a suggestion to allow the young person to go whilst ensuri mum feels she is safe.

So it’s not fur you and you don’t agree… no problem just scroll past it.

Why because I don’t agree with you?

Honestly, as many have said to you, your ideas are totally ridiculous! I think the next comment on this thread again agrees!

@Wooky073
You’ve said your dc is younger. Mum to a just turned 18 year old here. Parents have to endeavour to prepare their child for complete independence at 18 as they may just fly the coop. From the way my dd talks, I’m 99.9% sure there is a lot of talk on social media these days about 18 being an autonomous adult. I get this all sounds so alien to you right now. However your suggestions (bar tracking with consent) really are inappropriate for an almost adult.

Sorry but it is ridiculous - texting mum when she gets into the cinema to tell her what screen it is, mum arriving early to wait in the lobby for the film to finish.

perfectly sensible for a 12 year old going to the cinema alone for the first time. Utterly insane for a 17 year old who has done a year of 6th form

You are very rude and disrespectful.

For 17byear olds?;the age that can have left home ?

Do you have comprehension issues? You’re not reading what I’m saying?

Where did I say it was dangerous to share locations?

You forgot to apologise for the nonsense you accused me of if your previous post. You’ve missed that bit,

Your anxiety and paranoia are dangerous!

Just think when the 17 year old turns 18 in a few months time, they miraculously be an adult, be able to go to the cinema, pub, club, no tracking, AirTags or over zealous mothers! But not street wise at all.

Thank god the 17 year old in question is going to uni.

You are being utterly ridiculous. She’s 17 going to the cinema with a friend at a normally evening time. She is being collected immediately after so willl have a safe place to wait. Most young teens are going to the cinema with friends in fact most 17 year olds are doing much worse. I think you have anxiety. Is she an only child? In a year she could be at uni. How will you cope with that. Stop over controlling and seek help