AIBU to not let my 17 year old daughter go to the cinema at this time?

Sorry 🤣 Yep. 31 with my own kid now.
Unfortunately time ticks on and none of us get any younger.

i can read thanks 🤡

Nah I’m not the one being ridiculous here.

Honestly, please read (or, if necessary, re-read) OP's posts. This is not about OP not wanting to pick her up. It's about some completely barmy fear about dangerous cinema trips.

From the first two posts - let me know how you ended up with the impression that the issue was OP having to collect her:

1- AIBU to not let my 17 year old daughter go to the cinema at this time?

2- I don't think it'll be finished till close to 12am. Then I have to go and collect her and I'm really worried about her safety of being out so late at night

3. I feel like I shouldn't allow her to go because it's so late and it will be dark by that time obviously even though it's summer...

4- She wanted to see it specifically on opening night but I'm having serious doubts.

5- Don't have an issue going to collect her, a little annoying but that's fine by me

6- I'd much rather get her than her take a taxi or bus late at night or something which I do think is a bit more dangerous

Stop being ridiculous 🤣🤣🤣🤣

The OP isn’t “expected” to pick her up. Deary me.

The OP would be well within her right to tell her daughter “have fun at the cinema, make sure you get home via bus or uber with your friend, take your key I’ll be in bed”.

Giving that cinemas are usually in retail parks, shopping centres and city centres it’s going to be pretty straightforward arranging to get back home.

The OP is just over protective and anxious. It doesn’t mean she has to pick her daughter is. She is choosing to.

Anyway you all crack on, the OP is NBU. Other than for asking bizarre questions on mumsnet.

There is literally no real life parent of a 17 year old girl other than on mumsnet who would let them get a taxi at midnight. But 🤣

And mine wouldn’t have in 1992 either if I was alone.

I have a 17 year old. We do not pick her up at midnight on any night she fancies, and neither do her friends parents.

I’m not sure if you haven’t read the thread, but the op isn’t ’expected’ to pick her up. She wants to pick her up as she doesn’t want her to get a cab.

The expectation was that the OP picked her up so not sure what the ‘non driving’ relevance is.

Midnight is not the ‘evening’ either.

No. Her dd is 17 years old. It’s a perfectly normal time to be out for that age, be it for parties, work, other.

She’s 17, not 7? It’s not like she’s got school tomorrow.

The permission comment comes from OP asking (essentially) "should I let my daughter stay out this late" and thinking about telling her "she's not allowed to go".

Nothing to do with OP not wanting to pick her up. In fact she said she didn't want to "let" daughter to take a taxi.

I think if anyone is misunderstanding the issue, it's you.

No, we haven’t missed that. OP is concerned with the safety of a 17 year old attending a cinema, and was considering not allowing her to go on that basis.

That wasn't the point of the OP though? Not that she was unhappy having her evening disturbed to ick her up but about whether to let her go as it was late.

What do you suppose teens with non driving parents do?

Because the OP is expected to pick her up. Is this a thread of Russian bots?

That’s a different scenario.

Have you all missed that the OP is expected to pick her up at midnight?

Same, I was a waitress in a pub at this age, and would regularly creep back home at sunrise as the birds were singing! My Mum had me at 17 and was living with my Dad! At that age, a cinema trip with a parent waiting outside as soon as the film is finished should not be anxiety inducing.

No it’s not hard in this day and age. It’s much easier. Our kids have trackers and phones, we can track them in uber, public transport in many places runs much later that it used to. It’s much easier.

Another vote to give her some freedom. I didn’t do enough of this stuff when I was 17 living in a small village in Wales… then I moved to London for uni at 18 and did some really stupid shit cos I had zero street smarts!!

Honestly OP, I was driving at seventeen, so I would just have gone without having to bother a parent.

Your dd must be having a very different upbringing to the kids round where I live op. From about 15yo onwards, there’s a party in someone or others house most weekends. At least 30 guests each time, finish between 11pm to midnight normal. I do tend to pick my girls up, but it’s 50/50 amongst their friends with many expected to find their own way home. I know you’ve taken the comments with good grace op, but the fact that you asked the question suggests your dd is possibly years behind where she needs to be to be ready for uni etc

You’re massively infantilising her.

She’s 17! She’s almost an adult. It’s only the cinema. Why does she even have to ask permission?

For those of us who are 60 - maybe.

But many people on this thread will have been 17 within the last 10 years.

And many will have been parenting 17 year olds within the last 10 minutes.

And very different times in what way? Oh, before mobile phones enabled you to keep in touch with your parents or before they could see your location? Before Uber, before crime was invented?

We know more about it now, and the media and R Wing ramp it up. Ignoring the stats abut London being much safer than it was 10 years ago...for example.

17 year olds have always been 17 year olds, on the cusp of adulthood, needing to learn to be independent and out and about.

So...not rubbish.