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AIBU?

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Original poster

People asking if I'm pregnant (but it's just my fat tummy)

54 replies

NorthernPaws · 26/07/2026 23:03

I'm 49, and have put on some weight through my 40s and it mainly goes on my belly. Had 2 kids but that was in my early 30s so it's not even post-baby weight. I feel like my arms and legs look slim, but my tummy is big. I'm definitely not pregnant, but I've been asked a few times by aquaintances whether I am. It's happened quite a few times this year. AIBU to think it's a rude question?! I wouldn't dare ask someone unless I was sure!
It has made me feel that I really need to join a gym, but I don't know if exercises can particularly shrink belly fat or whether I just need to eat less. I do eat pretty healthily.
So AIBU to think that you should never ask someone if they're expecting unless you can 100% see that they are actually pregnant. Or should I not take it so personally?

OP posts:
EmeraldShamrock000 · 26/07/2026 23:10

At 49 it’ll be the peri menopause bulge/bloat. They are rude to ask. I’d never ask anyone. I made a huge mistake when I met a friend and she’d already had the baby, I asked if her time was near. It had only been two weeks. Mortifying.
At least they think that you are young enough to get pregnant.
I heard peppermint tea helps.

comfyshoes2022 · 26/07/2026 23:09

I’m sorry people said that to you. It’s definitely rude to ask women if they’re pregnant unless it’s blindingly obvious. I know someone who had a disease that caused bloating who was regularly asked this and it was mortifying to her.

CatesandAle · 26/07/2026 23:09

I’ve had this body type all my life, even when I’m slim I’ve got a bit of belly pooch and it’s sometimes led to assumptions. With the added insult that I don’t even have kids! Yes people should know better than to comment but often, it seems, they don’t. I try not to let it take up headspace. Just say briskly ‘no I’m not pregnant’ and watch them squirm.

SilenceInside · 26/07/2026 23:06

I am definitely in the “don’t say anything unless the other person confirms pregnancy” camp. I couldn’t cope with the level of embarrassment if I was wrong.