To ask ds to ask his gf to dress appropriately?

When I was a teenager, I also had an ex whose mother constantly criticised my clothing. I was told my skirts/shorts were too short and she mentioned it every time I wore black or DM boots . Occasionally, she would comment that I was wearing something which looked secondhand (yep) or like a man's shirt (also yep). I looked exactly like every other indie kid in the 90s! I avoided her as much as possible.

The big question is why is your son attracted to such a woman?

Seriously though, how often does this happen?

Does the OP's son's girlfriend really walk around with a skirt that show her knickers? How often does anyone see this in real life?

There are more posts on MN about women's inappropriate dress than there are women walking around in skirts that come half way down their arse.

Ok ok I take the point and I won’t say anything.
i know I certainly wore questionable clothes when I was young (t shirt with Jesus is a cunt on the back) but that was to nightclubs, not family events.
Also I’m not taking about a short skirt that shows some bum when walking, it was literally only covering half the cheeks, worn with stockings and suspenders with a g string. I think most people would think that a bit much for a family outing!

Seriously though, how often does this happen?

Does the OP's son's girlfriend really walk around with a skirt that show her knickers? How often does anyone see this in real life?

There are more posts on MN about women's inappropriate dress than there are women walking around in skirts that come half way down their arse.

It's not my place to police what anyone wants to wear but I also don't spend my time with people who wear shirts so short that half their bum is showing and their g strings.

And I definitely do not want to walk around with them in public because I have very different values.

some comments are so aggressive, the op only asked a question, she doesn’t sound particularly judgy

My son's ( now ex thank goodness) gf met his grandparents in a dress that had a thigh high split, off the shoulder and very low cut. I was gobsmacked that a woman of early twenties didn't know that was an inappropriate outfit.

Is she dressing that way as she wants your son to look, or what? I never believe that women feel empowered to be half naked when out.

'There is no objectively “correct” way to dress'

• that's ridiculous, not showing your bum IS a basic standard. I wouldn't want to see a man doing that either, would you?

Seriously though, how often does this happen?

Does the OP's son's girlfriend really walk around with a skirt that show her knickers? How often does anyone see this in real life?

There are more posts on MN about women's inappropriate dress than there are women walking around in skirts that come half way down their arse.

Ok ok I take the point and I won’t say anything.
i know I certainly wore questionable clothes when I was young (t shirt with Jesus is a cunt on the back) but that was to nightclubs, not family events.
Also I’m not taking about a short skirt that shows some bum when walking, it was literally only covering half the cheeks, worn with stockings and suspenders with a g string. I think most people would think that a bit much for a family outing!

No wonder so many boys and men think it’s okay to control women when their own mothers are advocating that they do it.

It is not okay on so many levels.

Exactly this. She can dress however she wants. You don’t get to decide what is or isn’t appropriate. There is no objectively “correct” way to dress. If this were the Victorian era you’d be appalled if she showed a glimpse of ankle!

God no. Do not teach your son he has a right to tell his girlfriend what to wear.

It’s not just about policing what women wear (and actually I think the responses would be the same if it was a man’s clothes OP had an issue with).

This is her son’s girlfriend. There’s no way to make this request that doesn’t cause issues. However it’s worded, whoever says it, no matter how well intentioned, there’s no way she doesn’t take it as “my boyfriend’s mum thinks I dress like a slut”.

Depending on the location, you could make practical suggestions. Eg the national trust we often go to a lot has a really long hilly stony walk that we do, as well as a nice house. If it’s somewhere like that and you’re doing a walk, suggesting sturdy shoes might result in her not wearing a skirt and instead going for a walking boots and shorts outfit. Or saying you’ll be having a picnic on the grass so not to wear anything she doesn’t want grass stains on.

it was literally only covering half the cheeks, worn with stockings and suspenders with a g string. I think most people would think that a bit much for a family outing!

There is no part of me that believes this.

Meaning you can see her knickers as she walks away

There are so many threads on here lately about 'inappropriate' clothes from what the neighbour hangs on the line to what a cleaner wears to suitable ensembles for cream tea in a National Trust tearoom.

Ok ok I take the point and I won’t say anything.
i know I certainly wore questionable clothes when I was young (t shirt with Jesus is a cunt on the back) but that was to nightclubs, not family events.
Also I’m not taking about a short skirt that shows some bum when walking, it was literally only covering half the cheeks, worn with stockings and suspenders with a g string. I think most people would think that a bit much for a family outing!