To ask ds to ask his gf to dress appropriately?

80% of their bra and the crotch of their thongs?

That's not true is it.

There really aren’t. I was in Kingston (London) yesterday and must have seen at least 30 teens wearing shorts so small they might as well be pants and crop tops that bared 80% of their bra. I know we all wore inappropriate things and maybe I’m just old but my mum would have grounded me for them. Lots of unbuttoned shorts too with the fly down and the crotch of their thongs showing.

Horrible .

This

Agreed.

Yesterday I was at a train station going up the stairs to get to my platform. There was a young woman in front of me with a mini skirt that barely covered her backside.

As she started walking up the stairs in front of me I could see half of her bum cheek and her thong.

Frankly it is not a sight I wanted to see.

Whether male or female, I really don't want to see that amount of flesh on display forced on me when I am out and about.

I think it looks vulgar and it is imposing parts of your body on others that frankly are better covered.

I feel the same about men exposing their sweaty chests or their builder's bum in public spaces/shops.

Men showing their arse crack out is rank. Absolutely rank. Wearing a short short skirt flashing a thong and an arse is rank.

True, you do sometimes see men's arse cracks (occasionally women's too, but not nearly as frequently); that is similarly unpleasant. However people who do this haven't deliberately put their outfit together and chosen to dress that way. Also, you will see people's discomfort when they see it; and if their mates notice it, they will often point it out and ridicule them for their malfunction. Nobody is defending their right to present hiw they choose and blaming anybody who points it out to them - whether discreetly or mockingly - of 'shaming' or 'controlling' them.

The crazy trend for wearing trousers underneath pants was indeed ludicrous, and I'm very glad that it disappeared. That said, at least the private flesh areas were usually not on display - albeit only covered by full-covering pants... mercifully nobody was ever wearing thongs or otherwise skimpy pants with that 'look'. Also, it was acknowledged as being rebellious and ridiculous - with parents and other adults commonly berating them to stop it - nobody saw it as a valid personal style choice that should be respected and accepted as normal. I can well imagine the parent of a GF who saw it freely mentioning that the man/boy in question 'may' need to pull up his trousers.

It's difficult, because there isn't really any male equivalent with which to properly compare it - and standard male clothing options don't usually allow for or encourage deliberate boundary pushing. Inappropriately under-dressing in public only seems to be the preserve of certain young women - and the ones who do so tend to be bold enough to turn it all straight back on to the person who objects - maybe painting them as jealous and/or dull (if female); or as a pervert for looking in front of him (if male); and/or as being controlling and seeking to police other people's personal choices/identity (both).

Pretty unlikely.

Younger you sounds lovely

Does the venue have a dress code e.g. smart casual? Everyone should adhere to that.

You're completely correct OP, it isn't appropriate. The same way no one would want their sons sagging their trousers on a trip to Buckingham palace.

"Going to idea someone hates women just because they object ti you doing whatever you klike with a disregard for everyone around you..."

You're literally referring to women choosing what clothes they wear. If me choosing what clothes I wear is "doing whatever I like", then I will do whatever I like. You object to women wearing what they want. Yikes. Have a wonderful evening.

Time to practise being a good future MIL op. Take her as she is, include her, be friendly and totally ignore her clothing choice- it’s literally nothing to do with you.

I didn't say it was fashionable to have a builders bum, I said it was a frequent occurance

Don’t. Leave her be. 🙄

Builders bums were never fashionable & the hip hop influence of trousers under the bum always involved pants, bum cheeks were not part of the look.

Of course YANBU. You know when going out you dress appropriately. Women seem to have a desire to flash their bits to the world when going out. Dress risque and then claim "oh dear why are you looking I'm doing it for myself". Standards are a thing. You can't just wear whatever you want.

Yabu to ask her to cover up if she doesn't want to or to ask him to ask her to. You don't have to like how she dresses but imagine if she started dictating what you can or cannot wear.

Men do quite frequently walk around with their arse cracks out, it was fashionable for years for men to wear their trousers below their arse.

Wearing a short skirt is very different to just a sock over your dick, or shoplifting or infact any form of antisocial behaviour youve listed. And whilst it's not an outfit I would chose to wear, your boyfriends mother criticising your clothes is never going to go down well. Never mind the fact we don't even know if this girl is planning on wearing a similar outfit for the daytrip!

What is the point of all these oblique references to behaviour that are obviously unacceptable and bear no relation to the post.

Shoplifting is illegal, men walking around wearing only socks on the bits is not the same at all as a young girl dressing how she feels comfortable. Personally I have no problem with people harmlessly expressing themselves through fashion, thats what this thread is about and the OP has already said she is not going to say anything. Obviously the other nonsense you reference is not the same thing and I am not going to engage any further nonsense about behaviour that has absolutely nothing to do with this thread.

There's 'not conforming' to social norms and then there's deciding to completely ignore basic social minimums. Are you really saying that if a man/bunch of men decided to identify as part of some kind of group which walks around everywhere naked - or maybe with a sock over their genitals but nothing else - the only people who would object would be the stuffy fuddy-duddies who bore on about social conventions and want to control what other people wear?

You can identify however you like, but that doesn't automatically mean that other people have no right to basic respect. How do you feel about people who 'identify' as shoplifters and follow their own conventions about obtaining food and other provisions without paying for them, rather than via the way that 'normal convention' suggests that you should?

My comments about the mackerel were very obviously hyperbolic - to point out that some undesirable behaviours are not covered by codes or rules, because it's assumed that people know perfectly well not to do it already. If you want a less hyperbolic example, they don't put up signs in their car parks telling visitors to only use one space, as marked out, and not to abandon their cars diagonally across 6 spaces - because again, it's very obvious what everybody is (and is not) supposed to do.

Are you for real? There have always been people who choose to dress differently from the 'mainstream' - goth, emo, punk - why should people have to conform because some middle aged women on the Internet think 'social convention' is the be all and end all. Reality check: it isn't to.some people and thats ok.

Your post is ridiculous - behaving in a way that would damage the displays and art is obviously not appropriate and in fact there are often signs about not touching or taking flash photographs for example. How someone dresses does absolutely no harm at all, except perhaps to the delicate sensibilities of those who are offended by what someone else is wearing. Get a grip!

Absolutely agree to let her know what you will be doing - outdoors, hiking etc so ahe can bring appropriate footwear but telling another adult what to wear - definitely unreasonable imo

I'm going to take a wild stab in the dark and say it's the g string and suspenders

Why would a presumably teenage/early 20s man not be attracted to his girlfriend in a short skirt?

Her outfit sounds gross but I don't think it's your place to say so

I take it from your post that they are 18+ , if so it’s up to her what she wears just as it’s your choice what to wear

I agree with other posters that if I was doing a picnic I would perhaps say to her (or my son if you won’t see her in time) please tell your gf that we are having a picnic/ doing a 5k hike / going out in a boat so she knows what you are doing on the trip and bears that in mind

The description of the girl’s outfit sounds like some kind of pervy fantasy. 🤢