Page 13 | Husband …we are not shopping today ..Aibu ?

Oblahdeeoblahdoe · 26/07/2026 12:06

I'm with the rest - why are you allowing him to tell you what to do?

Sherararara · 26/07/2026 12:06

I wonder what the husbands version of this story is?
“My wife meeps saying one thing but doing
another,AIBU?”
”Every time my wife and I go out for a meal or drink she always ends up shopping for hours and spending money we don’t have. She always promises she won’t but inevitably ends up in the shops. Today was the straw that broke the camels back. We agreed for a relaxing Sunday afternoon out and she immediately comes back with “Oh there’s this top I want in a shop around there..” I put my foot down for once and said no. Not least in the fact she’s off all week and can get it anytime. All I want is a relaxing meal out and no shopping for once.”

CertifiedClown · 26/07/2026 12:04

My husband would go get me the top.

Raise your standards.

Comeonelieen · 26/07/2026 12:04

Why didn’t you just get the top anyway? Do you think you need his permission or something?

Mymsy · 26/07/2026 12:04

Years ago we were in a large group of friends in a bar. One husband questioned his wife asking for a glass of wine. She paused then asked for the wine, a gin, a coffee, orange juice and bottled water which he bought and brought to her without query.
Take a leaf out of her book OP.

Howmanycatsistoomany · 26/07/2026 12:03

So now I’m gonna have to go back tomorrow (1 hour travel there and back ,plus another train fare

Don't be so soft OP, just go and buy the top!

bluebeck · 26/07/2026 12:01

You keep posting about this nasty little man but you stay in your shitty relationship.

Go and pick up your top. Then have a good think about why your self esteem is so low that you tolerate his behaviour.

midlifeattheoasis · 26/07/2026 12:01

YABU to let him dictate what you do. More fool you for putting up with it

Clemmie92 · 26/07/2026 12:01

inkyspells · 26/07/2026 10:57

Today me and my OH are going for drinks and food in a city around 30 mins train from our city.
I am at a concert on Friday and there’s a shop that has a top I’m looking for (we don’t have the shop in our city ) I plan on wearing it for the concert.
I checked and it’s in stock
So I said I’m just gonna pop in and grab it
He said “no we aren’t shopping today ,your off work all week ,go and get it another day “
I told him I know we aren’t shopping ,I just want this specific top.
Im literally walking past the shop to get to the area with the pubs.
So now I’m gonna have to go back tomorrow (1 hour travel there and back ,plus another train fare”

Aibu to be a bit annoyed ?
I asked him again and he went in a mood so I just said fine il go another day.

Also. If you don’t go and get it you have accepted that he can dictate much more. Stop being a push over. I don’t understand why you’re with someone you’re scared of, you are going to walk past the shop and planned to go back next week… it makes no sense..

Mygardenshedisfallingdown · 26/07/2026 12:00

vegemitesandwiches · 26/07/2026 11:58

OP has been posting about this bloke for years. She was told not to marry him, did so anyway and is still moaning about him!

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Ah, more fool her then no sympathy love, you made your bed over due time to get out of it. Years ago would have been good.

NoWordForFluffy · 26/07/2026 12:00

vegemitesandwiches · 26/07/2026 11:58

OP has been posting about this bloke for years. She was told not to marry him, did so anyway and is still moaning about him!

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Yes, I just did an AS given the comments. Why she stays with him is beyond me.

itsgettingweird · 26/07/2026 11:59

Just because he’s having a tantrum about what he doesn’t want to do doesn’t mean you need to change what you plan to do.

as you walk past the shop “just nipping in to grab the top. You wanna walk to the pub and grab a table and the drinks? I’ll have a X. See you in about 10 minutes”.

If he says no just say “I’ll see you when I come out then. Where will you be waiting?”

Don’t make his tantrums worthwhile the same way you wouldn’t have a toddler had one.

Purplecatshopaholic · 26/07/2026 11:58

Oh ffs, why are you putting up with this shit op?

Mygardenshedisfallingdown · 26/07/2026 11:58

Loulou4022 · 26/07/2026 10:59

“I’m not asking! I’m telling” I’m just nipping in to grab this top I won’t be 10 minutes, love you, bye

This but wouldn't bother with the love you bit though. I'd be more thinking 'fuck you' who made him the boss of you OP?

vegemitesandwiches · 26/07/2026 11:58

NoWordForFluffy · 26/07/2026 11:48

I feel like I've missed a huge back story!

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OP has been posting about this bloke for years. She was told not to marry him, did so anyway and is still moaning about him!

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 26/07/2026 11:57

GoodbyeZebedee · 26/07/2026 10:58

You don’t have to agree with him? You could just go in quickly and if he’s in a mood, bad luck him. Is he normally controlling?

This...

Like hell I'd waste time and pay another train journey.

You're literally going to be what? 5 minutes.

Clemmie92 · 26/07/2026 11:56

inkyspells · 26/07/2026 10:57

Today me and my OH are going for drinks and food in a city around 30 mins train from our city.
I am at a concert on Friday and there’s a shop that has a top I’m looking for (we don’t have the shop in our city ) I plan on wearing it for the concert.
I checked and it’s in stock
So I said I’m just gonna pop in and grab it
He said “no we aren’t shopping today ,your off work all week ,go and get it another day “
I told him I know we aren’t shopping ,I just want this specific top.
Im literally walking past the shop to get to the area with the pubs.
So now I’m gonna have to go back tomorrow (1 hour travel there and back ,plus another train fare”

Aibu to be a bit annoyed ?
I asked him again and he went in a mood so I just said fine il go another day.

How long have you been in a controlling relationship, OP? The fact it’s on the way and won’t inconvenience him is mental. Why are you with someone who doesn’t like you? He wouldn’t stop his friend or family member if they said this so why you? God, I couldn’t deal with a grumpy guy, life’s too short.

NoWordForFluffy · 26/07/2026 11:56

GordanoServices · 26/07/2026 11:54

She has posted a lot before about her husband being a complete arse.

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Hopefully she'll leave him at some point then.

GordanoServices · 26/07/2026 11:54

NoWordForFluffy · 26/07/2026 11:48

I feel like I've missed a huge back story!

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She has posted a lot before about her husband being a complete arse.

username2185 · 26/07/2026 11:54

Someone remind me.. is Inkyspells the one who’s husband drinks too much or is that someone else 😅 I’m thinking of a honeymoon post.

BeautifulViolets · 26/07/2026 11:54

So you are literally passing the shop and yet you can’t go in to get the item and you have to go again another day. Ok then. 🙄

Topseyt123 · 26/07/2026 11:53

Just go into the shop yourself and get the top. No need for permission from him and surely he doesn't have to go with you. He could have a coffee, or do whatever else he wanted to.

I would have just told him what I was doing and then gone and done it. It wouldn't have been up for discussion.I'd have rejoined him afterwards.

Go and get your top. He doesn't have to come. If he then continues to throw his toys out of the pram about it then he's a controlling arse and a spoilt brat.

username2185 · 26/07/2026 11:52

Don’t let him tell you what to do, you’re an adult.

InterestedDad37 · 26/07/2026 11:49

Sod him. Get your top. Point out that it'll probably take less time than it would waiting at the bar get served.

Fluffyscrubberdo · 26/07/2026 11:49

NotAnotherScarf · 26/07/2026 11:20

But is there a back story her. Is the op like me...has to look at everything in the shop, has to go from shop to shop just looking. Then I go back to the very first thing i looked at. Has he had enough of being dragged around the shops. Does he know it will be "oh lets just look in M and S" My wife has she refuses to shop with me now.

Plus the op will be carrying at least 2 bags everywhere....getting in the way in the. small restaurant, banging against him constantly and resentful looks suggesting he carries it....

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Why on earth would a single top in a bag be banging into things or getting in the way in a restaurant 😂