AIBU to be hurt by my husbands actions even though his son is sick?

Why on earth would your own Mum try and convince you to stay with someone who has cheated on her daughter, not once but twice!
I'd be telling my daughter to leave and not look back.
Good luck with what you decide to do.
You deserve much more respect than that x

What are you talking about? I didn’t say it’s okay for him to cheat on her. But he has a child who is seriously ill. She cannot realistically expect him to have no contact with his ex.

He can stop seeing her but he could’ve stayed out of her knickers. There’s no turning back now, he’s ended your marriage

It’s your marriage, not your mum’s.

You will be so much happier free of this cheating scumbag.

I hope the little boy recovers.

Tell me is this cultural? That your mum and family would not be outraged by his infidelity towards you? That they are accepting he would do this?

That he would expect you to accept his infidelity with his ex???

I'm flummoxed. 🤔

Throw this one bsck.
You do not need to be entangled in this situation. Get him gone pronto

It must be truly awful having a young child so poorly and he and his ex wife will need to lean on each other and support each other. That’s understandable. Sleeping together does not fall under that category. And he can hardly say he regrets it when he went back and did it again! Then he has the nerve to hurt you even more telling you that you’ll never understand it like she does!! That would be a game ender for me. But I don’t know that I could leave/throw him out while all this is going on. I might just retreat to the spare room for now and make plans to split without actually doing it just yet. But I truly don’t see how you come back from this.
And why on earth isn’t your mum supporting you??

You're 29 with no kids. You have all the time in the world to start again - with someone who doesn't use his seriously ill child as an excuse to cheat. God only knows what your mother is thinking - but you deserve a lot better than this.

He's right in saying his ex will understand the pain he is going through better than you as she is going through the same. But that doesn't give them the right to shag. Do the right thing for you and leave him.

His son’s sickness is not an excuse to cheat. Glad you are dumping him.

What is the housing situation? Is it your home or joint?

He's cheated. And will do it again. Why on earth would your Mum want you to stay married to him?

I get he feels the need to support the boy's mother but fail to see how sleeping with her twice is supportive.

However sad and difficult the situation is, you need to do what's best for you.
I personally wouldn't be sticking around after he'd done that in the first year of marriage.

Sorry op but he has to go. X

Contact yes but not to just go and shag her at same time!

Your no.2 answer is ridiculous, yes the child needs his parents and time and care,but it doesn't give him carte blanche to shag her,iam sure that doesn't come under the term as 'caring'

YANBU at all. This situation is awful and you need to step away from it. There is nothing for you in it and I think your husband could potentially end up back in his original family before your eyes which will just bring endless pain to you.

I’m so sorry for everyone in this scenario and so sorry for you.

I cannot think of any situation where if tell my DD to stay with her husband after he'd slept with his ex on two occasions.

WTF is wrong with that woman?

Just leave him , he has cheated on you at least twice and believe me it will be more than that . Having a sick child and her being his ex wife doesn’t excuse his appalling behaviour , what on earth is the matter with your mother .

You have every right to be hurt, their son being sick does not mean they need to jump into bed. He’s a prick

I voted you are being u reasonable because you are being unreasonable to stay with this absolute pig

How can he possibly stay away from her, that’s their CHILD? I am a second wife also. Sex ONE TIME after the diagnosis could be forgivable.

I am also a second wife. No amount of sex after diagnosis is forgivable. Helping an ex with a shared child is fine, but becoming her chauffeur (unless it’s hospital related) and sleeping with her is just not on.

His child has a life threatening condition. They need to have contact as there will be lots to discuss.

He has broken your trust twice and I would absolutely divorce in their situation. He is gaslighting you by saying you aren't a mother and can't understand his pain. Not sure how shagging is understanding each other's pain but there you go. Ditch him and seriously think about why at 29 years old you are letting your mother influence your decisions. Also some form of counselling might be a good idea and seriously consider whether dating someone with an existing child is something you want to do.

Count your lucky stars, this is your sign to leave. Im glad you dont have your own children with this man.

Yes, you're being unreasonable - because you should be requesting a divorce.

It's sad that his child has cancer, but the issue is that he's a cheater, and that he's too involved with his ex. I couldn't live with this guy, personally.

Slime ball cheating ex husband. Stay away or leave