Another weekend and another drunken DP ‘performance’

That's missing the point. I am not condemning all men who have had a crafty wank and were caught before the clean up.
I am more concerned about the way he was upset because he had assumed he was going to get sorted out. Then when he wasn't ,went into a sulk and stopped off to the sofa named where he then sorted himself out. Its the passive aggression in this I dislike and find a bit disturbing. Most reasonable guys if returning to their partner drunk ir not and asked to be sorted out should realise their partner may not be into that at that time. Most would just laugh it off and apologise and go back to sleep. The entitled way he went ino an upset sulk is the problem. And probably the cause of the stain! Prob had coke or mdma maybe and took himself too seriously. Definitely a warning sign.

Ejaculate or urine? Oh what a lovely choice🤣

This is the perfect example of us all having different standards. That you didn’t react with humour, roll your eyes and go back to sleep tells me that your standards are higher than your friend’s and that it’s not going to work out long term with this man.

There are already so many compromises to be made when you move in with another adult. You’ll already have different ways of doing things, different standards and definitions of what constitutes clean. Having to deal with a man who gets so drunk he can’t even be bothered to turn on the charm when he wants sex, and then stains your sofa, is really more hard work than you need, isn’t it?

Where is the pod that's generating these guys and can someone please unplug it? Give them a wide berth if they're lying on your sofa.

Hello again johnson85, perhaps you might like to re read the post. The writer has been putting up with this for 12 months and it’s getting worse. That’s more than one drunken mistake.

When women, or indeed men, are repeatedly treated as if they and their property are something to be used and abused, over time it damages their own self respect. When a partner is repeatedly, knowingly and without care, damaging someone’s sleep, that is not ok.

You call me immature, and say I’m not broad minded. I’m just trying to help someone see that they don’t have to put up with abuse.

Yes I’m single, and this does make me different from the overwhelming majority. Your implication being that there’s something wrong with that. May, I suggest that this shows yourself to be the one who is not broad minded. Furthermore this underlying attitude contributes to the fact that many women are stuck in abusive, or just unsatisfactory, relationships. Sometimes I just need to call this out.

Even If he did have “memory black out” the fact he gets himself into that much of a state of what is clearly drugs and alcohol, there’s an issue there.

@Johnson85 but having wank and getting it on the sofa really doesn't seem that serious to me.

Really?, he doesn’t live there, it’s not his sofa to mess up.

Edited to add that I can’t believe that anyone would think OP’s partners behaviour is not that serious - what a time to be alive. Ffs 🙄

It's just incredible that he's trying to convince us all that it's not a big deal. Imagine putting up with this nonsense when there's kids involved. Get rid OP.

ah another passive aggressive and triggered man. Where doesn’t say I “hate men” my family members and sons are very much loved and are amazing guys. You hate the fact women have learnt to live without you guys and you aren’t needed, hence why you stalk a mothers group chat… odd.

Yes women of course do annoying things, never have I seen a women jizzing on a man’s furniture though and then shrugging it off the next morning. If men created a space to discuss such things you would be there, but again a man is invading a woman’s space and trying to undermine them.

Oh he's probably busy staining his own sofa, in his little solo flat.

Bill him for a new sofa. If he doesn't pay it, take him to small claims court.

Honestly he is absolutely disgusting. Get rid - save your sanity. Appauling behavior towards you. Such nasty behaviour doing that on your sofa after getting trollied.

The 'visual' on this made me smile. Like rubbing a puppy's nose in their 'mess' (which of course one doesn't really do). "Bad man, BAD MAN, no no no!! Now, you get outside!!!".

What is it about woman having boundaries that upsets you so much? You sound almost panicked.

Not as thankful as I am not having to put up with that.

An alternate way of looking like this is that, yes, it's totally understandable that you're single if you are going to want to dump someone for a single drunken mistake that impacts nothing other than mild hygeine issues.

If you want to be single, all good. If you or anyone else wants to enjoy a relationship (ie, the overwhelming majority) then just worth noting they will have more success with a more tolerant, more light approach to life.

Bloody hell. In otherwords, shut your mouth woman, let men do as they want and stop 'nagging'.

I didn't see what that poster wrote, @Heatwavefry, but you really can't expect answers in the majority other than that your DP is an unpleasant man and at least one of your 'friends' is a fuckwit.

Please extricate yourself from this man. He'll be the kind of bloke who makes a mess and owes you money, to quote a very sensible pal of mine.

What a bizarre take... Enjoy single life, I suppose? Congrats on not liking men? Wildly off topic, of course, but the male loneliness epidemic has everything to do with the male tendency to eschew emotional depth and vulnerability in their platonic relationships and nearly nothing to do with jizzing on the sofa.

For the majority of women who DO like men and want to coexist with them like healthy adults, I simply suggest some occasional leeway in behaviour you find sub optimal may make the relationship run more smoothly. As almost certainly you do things he finds odd, annoying, etc etc.

I would dump him but if you don't want to i would make it a rule that he never goes to yours after being out with his mates, however convenient it is for him. He can 'sort himself out' at home.

I would rather be single than be with a man so disrespectful. You are as vile as the OP 's ex boyfriend.

The thunderclap from my vulva slamming shut would be heard around the world.

I’d never get over the ick.

time to say bye bye OP

Yup.

I think you need to really think about what you want from a relationship. What do you get from it?

It would be the end of the road for me. It’s totally disrespectful. He should pay for a deep clean and be grovelling. Not minimising.

ew.