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Should partner leave his club over sexual messages

57 replies

Rachibe · 24/07/2026 20:55

Name changed but long time poster on here.

Long story short, I’ve caught DP out sending inappropriate messages to another woman, who he tells me he met at the club where he plays padel tennis. She got his details from the group chat and they’ve been messaging since. He swears nothing has happened (I do believe this) and that he has made a stupid mistake which he regrets.

I am struggling to see past this though.

Example messages - DP sent her a photo cropped from instagram that she was in, posted from a social event at their club. She is sat down, he sent the photo and said ‘I wish I was that chair’.

There’s another one about how sweaty it was playing, DP sends an innuendo. The same night, he’s on about her having great stamina and says it’s good they’ve never been on the same team as he would need to buy bigger shorts.

I am feeling awfully upset and don’t know if I can get past this. Do you think there is any coming back from these comments and is it wrong of me to ask him to no longer go to that club?

OP posts:
AnonymityAnonymity · 24/07/2026 21:01

It sounds as though he had every intention of taking his relationship with this woman to another level. He has made it very clear he is interested in a physical relationship with her.

I couldn't get past the betrayal of your relationship OP and the total disrespect he has shown you. I don't see how you can trust him going forward.

Jeschara · 24/07/2026 21:00

He sounds very immature. I don't know that I would tell you to move on that is up too you. The chair message did make me cringe though.

cestlavielife · 24/07/2026 20:59

Just leave him.
The club is irrelevant.
He will still be a twat.
He will do the same again.

Auroraloves · 24/07/2026 20:58

If you hadn’t have seen the messages do you trust that this weird flirtation wouldn’t have progressed?

even if it’s not physical cheating, it’s definitely emotional cheating

ThisAmpleDenimCrab · 24/07/2026 20:58

So sorry for you. I wouldn’t be able to get past this. He at least wanted something to happen if it hasn’t already x

Sux2buthen · 24/07/2026 20:58

I would move on. You deserve better than that

Cantbelieveit888 · 24/07/2026 20:57

Just awful!!!

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