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AIBU?

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Original poster

Do you believe in this often said term?

113 replies

Kate879 · 24/07/2026 20:48

I’ve had some bad news this week re. my job security and I know people are trying to be helpful but “everything happens for a reason” isn’t a consolation at the moment.

Do you believe that to be true?

OP posts:
Arlanymor · 24/07/2026 20:56

I think it’s a shit thing to say to someone facing bad news. I can understand it applied after an event when things have taken a good turn. But to say it as a panacea for bad news is really insensitive and actually fairly ignorant. I do hope things improve for you and sorry that you’re going through a rough time.

NerrSnerr · 24/07/2026 20:55

I don’t think everything happens for a reason but I do think everything will work out in the end.

I think that’s my mindset as I lost a sibling to suicide when I was younger and if I didn’t have that mindset about my own life I’d quickly become hopeless (I think)

DeftGoldHedgehog · 24/07/2026 20:55

No. And it is sometimes said pretty thoughtlessly.

LandSsmum · 24/07/2026 20:55

It’s a phrase said by people who are either lucky or life’s optimists. Nothing wrong with it- optimists are happy and healthy but like you, I need to dwell on my feelings before I can get back to taking action. Sorry you’ve had a rough day

Backedoffhackedoff · 24/07/2026 20:54

I sort of get it but I think it’s more about your life experiences and the way that shapes your future than some “cosmic” reason. Ie as scary as redundancy is, I would say 3/4 years on many people look back and think it was the right thing to happen.

i also think it depends on your attitude to life- I think it’s less common but I once worked with someone who was the most self absorbed, bitter, attention seeking person. She was made redundant and I aM sure she’s still negative as hell about it years later.

Harrumphhhh · 24/07/2026 20:54

No. Some things are just shit.

Auroraloves · 24/07/2026 20:53

I hate it too. As if it’s supposed to offer any consolation when you’re struggling for whatever reason

EverMissWicklowSometimes · 24/07/2026 20:53

Yes I do.

GarlicEverywhere · 24/07/2026 20:53

It's technically true! Everything happens because of other things that happened.

But they mean everything bad thing has hidden benefits, which is obviously bollocks.

Since it's about work, though, I'll offer you another one: When one door closes, another one opens.

I mean, it might be a door to Shitsville or a trapdoor. One thing's certain, though, a closing door's going to mean you take a new path. Hope it all works out well for you.

Octavia64 · 24/07/2026 20:53

No

PrettyLittleRose · 24/07/2026 20:53

I believe it. Doesn't help when you're in the throes of something bad or negative happening, but yes I do believe in fate and destiny and that there's a reason a particular thing happened.

I know some don't but I do.

Mpll · 24/07/2026 20:51

Absolutely not. I’m not sure what the reason was for multiple miscarriages and subsequent permanent infertility.

ColdAsAWitches · 24/07/2026 20:50

No. There's no such thing as fate, or destiny or luck. Things just happen.