DD and friend had drinks spiked, now in ITU AIBU?

I’m so sorry for what you and your DD are going through and hope she makes a quick recovery.

It has happened to the sons of 2 of my friends, one was touch and go. he got separated from friends and the staff at the club thought he was drunk. It was touch and go for him at one point. The other was abroad when it happened. I’d always worried about my DD but realised I need to worry about DS too.

My DDs friend was spiked with a needle in a university bar, fortunately she was with a big group and the rest of them got her to the hospital and she was physically ok but very shaken.
To people asking op where in the country her daughter and friend had their drinks spiked, it is irrelevant this is a very common occurrence all over the country.

Why on earth does anyone think you are being unreasonable?

I would be livid.

It is shocking but sadly all too common. Wishing your dd a speedy recovery.

Because it can be bar staff, someone "bumps" into you.

Do not victim blame because one day it will be you or someone you care about. Will you be blaming yourself or them?

Ffs it's like saying a girl dressing in a shirt skirt is asking to be raped.

People like you disgust me

I was spiked by a woman, there was CCTV proving it.

I’m not saying this in a “whataboutery” way but rather to raise awareness; we need to be wary of everyone in certain situations and not have a false sense of security around other women, strangers are strangers at the end of the day.

How awful for her, and you. I hope she's better very soon. So many dangers for our dds that never happened in our growing up.

To all those idiot victim blamers it takes a split second. Happened to my friend early 50s in quite a nice themed bar she was with her dh.

So very sorry your famiky are going theough this (and a huge yay for the protective brothers!!!)

But please thank whatever you believe in for a sensible friend and them both trusting their intuition.

I was spiked in my 20's, I have a good idea who did it (work colleague) and I am so very grateful to a work friend (male) who rang his wife and told her that he thought I had been spiked, I don't drink so it was very obvious, and told her he wouldn't be leaving my side til he knew inwas ok. He sat on my cheap ass dining chair all night in the hall outside my bedroom, doors open and watched me all night in case I took a turn for the worse.

He risked rumours and his marriage to make sure inwas ok.

His wife is a very lucky lady and I will always be eternally grateful to her and him for being so amazing and looking after me.

If what you say is true then the bar staff must be dodgy and working in cahoots with other men who use the bar.

That's what happened to me 40 years ago. The barman had been my friend.

You're right. These silly girls. Getting themselves into these situations. Let's hope the Police investigate their stupidity before trying to track down the perpetrator. I imagine they'll be desperate to give her a good telling off when she regains consciousness. In ITU.

🙄🤨

Blaming victims like this is disgraceful.
Shame on you for siding with perpetrators.

Needles seem to be commonly used these days.

Watch some magic shows. Or those programmes about catching pickpockets. Distraction and sleight of hand take a fraction of a second.

In a busy bar it's not always possible to keep line of sight on the person preparing your drink. You can be jostled on the way to a table, enought to distract you for an instant. Vigilance is important, but it's impossible to maintain perfectly for every second of every time you go out. I'm glad you've been lucky so far, but that doesn't make you a better person than those who haven’t.

Spiking isn’t just limited to drinks. It can be done via vapour and other methods.

This happened to me and luckily I escaped to the toilets where my friends found me and got me home. The club said if they called an ambulance I’d be in trouble for taking drugs! I hadn’t taken drugs, I was drugged.

Like you, I lacked the imagination to understand how it could happen, until it happened to me. You cannot possibly be eagle-eyed enough to always watch a bartender without taking your eyes off them for a second. And perhaps you have never been to the kind of place where drinks are brought to your table.

@Pissedoffmama so sorry this happened to your daughter and her friend. Definitely get in touch with the bar and ask for any CCTV footage. It's disgusting that this still isn't being taken seriously when it's been happening for decades.

If only the Police kept data on who's actually doing the spiking and not just who's being spiked. Then maybe it would be easier to deal with whataboutism when it appears in threads like these.

Collect evidence. Investigate. Do their job.

There are lots of reasons someone might not have their drink glued to their hand all night. In my case 30 years ago I was in a club and told I was not allowed drinks on the dancefloor. I watched my glass from a couple of yards away but obviously someone opportunistic managed to get to it. These people use many tactics such as distraction or making out they are being helpful.

Theres loads od videos online about how quickly and easily someone can spike your drink, take a look and maybe you will "understand"

I know you want to blame these girls, and it makes you feel better about yourself to think this wouldnt happen to you, but it takes all of a second to spike someones drink and even if the DD has been lax with her drink its not her fault someone has tried to take advantage of her

That’s some serious victim blaming, it takes a second for a drink to be spiked, god forbid a woman talks to her friends while looking at them, or fucking blinks for too long.

@sunshinesuzeyyes I can see that you don’t understand it. That’s something you can probably work on if you read the posts here and have a bit of a think about it, and possibly do some reading round on the topic.

Do you mind telling us where in the UK this happened, OP? Might be particularly useful for parents with teens/young people in the area to be warned…