AIBU to consider leaving our knitting group over its new policy?

What an appalling opinion. Can you not see why some women may want space away from men? Try opening your mind.

So? You've not explained why you think (or if you really do think) that women are only allowed single sex spaces if there is a risk of assault. Can you explain that?

This IS completely different - the law allows single sex spaces, it doesn't allow single race spaces.

Women are allowed to have women's only groups, clubs, sports, prisons, hospital wards... same as men have single sex spaces. The big difference is that in a group of women there will always be survivors of serious SA and/or male abuse/harrassment - the incidence of these crimes against men is very low. Women who want to have some time in a women only space are not bigots.

It sounds like you just don’t like trans people and actually has nothing to with men vs women spaces. You’re happy for men to join. Just not trans women.

its just a person OP. You may not even know.

agree as a group to have a mixed group and then it’s whichever human turns up to enjoy knitting. You don’t have to have any discriminatory practices then. But you can decide on some best practice rules such as no verbal abuse, no discrimination, no bullying

Every knitting group I've been in (and I have 30 years of them under my belt) has several women who love to tell others how they're wrong: wrong pattern, wrong bind-off, wrong yarn, wrong needles, wrong everything. At least until someone else tells them (usually quietly, sometimes directly) to give it a rest. I find it extraordinarily difficult to believe that men would be the first and only ones to come in and get all bossy and opinionated in your average knitting group.

By contrast, the transwomen, transmen, gay men, straight men, bi men, and nb people I've come across in those knitting groups have been just as variable as people generally are. Most all the people I've met in these groups are lovely and thrilled by knitting, talented and funny. A few occasional arseholes but those are generally knocked into shape or find an elsewhere to be.

But then again, the groups I've been in have had people able to use their words and have a civil discussion. OP might want to try that instead of declaiming here.

I mean, this was a base for racial segregation- saying that white people have right to white people only spaces.

I would say the chairwoman has no right to announce any changes to the group without there being an anonymous vote. I wouldn't like having a hobby like knitting try to be overly and unnecessarily politicised whether it be trans, social status, race, etc. If this chairwoman is new, chances are she'll move onto a different hobby if she finds people push back and don't let her dictate what happens.

Worst case scenario, I would quietly form a splinter group with the people who's company I enjoy.

Given that in your OP you said
I don't want men in the group
I think the readers can be forgiven for assuming that you don't want men in the group!
Reading comprehension is not poor.
Posters are reading exactly what you said
How else were we to take I don't want men in the group?
Please explain

Do the trans men you’re apparently friends with know that you view them as women? I’m surprised they want to remain friends with you if that’s the case

It's a knitting group. OP clearly framed it that she doesnt want men there because of past experiences with being assaulted. The likelihood of a trans woman turning up to a knitting group to assault anyone is... well...extremely low. I am a member of a few hobby groups with a higher than average number of trans members, and they are more likely to have been assaulted themselves than the other way round. Which is why Im saying to not give in to paranoia and scaremongering.

If OP wanted a certain type of group and restrict it to biological women only, then she should have kept tabs on it and not conveniently give up organising to someone else. The place grew, has more members, and someone else is putting a lot of effort in running it. She can always run a new club with like minded people.

It’s nothing like excluding people on the basis of their ethnicity! Women have the right to single-sex activities, as do men. If you allow trans-identifying men you have to allow all men, so you can’t call it a women’s group any more.

I think it’s weird that anyone should advertise that they now accept a certain person?

it’s sounds like the group has plenty of members so I think they should leave it and if there were a trans woman then they should only be asked to leave if they didn’t follow any rules/polices etc. you may not even know they are trans! How would you check?! Do people have to fill out a form and declare their identity?

i find it strange that women get up in arms when they are declined access to men’s spaces or traditional men’s spaces and clubs. Yet it’s ok to deny access to men or other identities.

it’s knitting and I doubt there’s much risk here?

Would suggest to the Chair to do a members vote

Are women only allowed to want same sex groups, if there's a risk of sexual assault in your world? Why is that?

I’ve never said I’d be against men in the group.

Well, your first post includes this:

I don’t want men in the group, trans identifying or otherwise.

How long will she be chairwoman for? Is it for a term or ongoing?

I would be tempted to wait and see if it all fizzles out, and only leave when the situation you fear actually arises. You could also try sounding out your mates to set up your own new group

OP, vote with your feet and make other arrangements with your similarly minded friends.
That is 100% your choice to make.
Don't allow this woman and her virture signalling to spoil what you enjoy.
Just set up a new WhatsApp and decide on a new location.
Good luck.

You can voice your concerns. If the majority share them, then the policy should be reconsidered. If you're in the minority, you need to decide what's more important to you, and yes, that might mean you have to leave.

But it's a knitting group and you don't mind men joining it, just trans people. That's a difficult position to defend really. You disagree with trans ideology, which is fine. Not wanting to be near trans people in a space that isn't designated female-only, and indeed you yourself don't wish to designate as female-only, is not an easy thing to stick your head above the parapet over.

Your position is, to my understanding, the definition of trans exclusionary - so, a terf. There are many women with understandable and legitimate concerns about trans men entering female only spaces that don't seek to deny the right of trans people to exist, just to protect biological women from predators. They're not terfs. You are though. You wish to exclude people from a hobby group that you'd happily accept mixed genders in, based on beliefs that you don't agree with.

Loads of people believe in stuff I don't believe in - and stuff that's a lot more harmful than 'dressing up in a frock and calling themselves Susan', to use your distasteful language. Climate science deniers and racists cause more societal harm. Would you knit next to them? The men you say you are happy to welcome are objectively more likely to harm you, than our befrocked trans woman friend Susan. Why are you more inclined to knit next to them?

Whatever. It's no odds to me. Leave the group you enjoy because it welcomes a minority. It's nice going back to the 50s.

Ok, so your entire premise and post is a goady lie.

You claimed an aversion to the male gaze and triggering from sexual assault were your reasons for wishing to avoid men.

I won't bother reading any more. This whole thread was for the Daily Mail.

Did she? I have asked her to clarify.

If this is true, she's a disingenuous idiot and I am sorry I bothered reading any of this, since she talked about the male gaze and sexual assault as being two of the reasons she wanted to avoid all men.

She doesn't object to men being in the group though. She said it'd be fine if there was a change to inviting all men to join the group.
She just doesn't want trans women in there.