To persevere with this relationship?

I think if you are content to know you will probably never live with him or marry him but he may in the future choose someone else (which is a risk for anyone on a relationship tbh) then crack on.

I just think you need to think about whats so special about him that you are willing to accept a situation that you yourself don’t think is ideal.

I honestly think it’s his unavailability thats got you hanging on. I genuinely think it would have worn off if you had a normal amount of contact for a relationship. Honestly DH lived a one and a half hour drive away from me when we were dating and he would do the drive to have dinner at mine and then drive back at least once a week. If I had lived five minutes away we would have seen each other a lot more, even if it was just to grab dinner etc. it’s all quality time. Even for very independent people who want their own space seeing a loved one a few times a week is not going to be too much.

I’m not judging and I don’t think you are being silly, the heart wants what it wants. But he is never going to give you what you actually want from him specifically. Tbh even if you leave him you can probably go back later if you don’t find what you are looking for, there is a danger he’ll just find someone else but if I’m being brutally honest you are already in that situation.

But surely you do have the time? If you only life 5 minutes away from each other, why would you be getting up early? You’d be getting up at the same time to get ready for work as you do when you’re at your own house?

You don’t persevere with a relationship at least not in this context. What you do is endure or tolerate something that isn’t quite what you aspired to or envisaged because you want the other person and will take whatever you are gifted whilst explaining away the way they treat you against the backdrop of your entirely legitimate life choices. Meanwhile the other person has massive opportunities to take the piss and hope the other individual concerned will do the enduring or tolerating. Not even hope perhaps expect or assume. Hope is not a word I would dignify this other person’s behaviour or mindset with.
Not sure what advice you want really. It’s obvious you are trying to make sense of a situation but nobody else can walk in your shoes and feel what you feel so you have gone to great lengths to respond accordingly on this thread.
Not wanting children and wanting what you have outlined doesn’t mean some sort of perpetual state of will he won’t he is reconcilable.
separate them out and imagine this was you responding to the scenario objectively and instinctively. Then you might have your answer

You’re not getting any younger is the reason to end this, not to settle for it. There are more than two men on the planet op.

If you’re happy and he’s happy with this arrangement then what’s wrong with it?
Trying to second guess how you might feel in some hypothetical future seems futile to me.

I last posted about him during the pregnancy

Well, that's a HUGE something you have left out of your OP.

So I don't know how to advise you. Sorry OP.

Hope it all works out.

I’m glad that you are very happy in your life but I don’t understand how you can be very happy in this relationship when you’re wondering if you could be more content being with someone else and saying you don’t know what you want. And similarly you say you love spending time together but choose to only see each other once a fortnight. I’m just struggling to understand how this all fits together

He wants what you have now. You want more. I would suggest that you start being honest about what you want, and not piggybacking along with what he wants and calling it fine.

Your friends can see straight through this, once you start saying out loud what you want you'll find it easier to make it happen.

Life is uncertain for sure but you can still think about where you’d like to see yourself and things you’d like to achieve, places you’d like to go and things you’d like to experience. It sounds like you’re in limbo at the moment because he wants things to stay as they are which holds you back from thinking too much about the future but being honest, you don’t sound overly happy in general and I’m not saying this in a critical way, I’m being genuine.

Do you think you could be happier?

Do you want children?

It’s not that long, op. Some people have a very short attention span!

If you are monogamous, have you talked to him about what HE wants? How HE sees the future?

Do you refer to him as your partner? Does he refer to you as such? See each others’ families? Does he look after you when you are sick? Help you with DIY? Is either or both of you neuro-divergent?
is it more important for you to see him, or to see your friends? Do you make plans for the future? Celebrate your anniversary?

I don't see why you need to live with someone. You don't seem to need the company, or to sleep with someone, every night. You have your own place and can do what you want with your money and he with his. A lot of women end up as housekeepers, carers and a lack of sleep because of snoring. I think you need to ask your friends what their issue is. If you were wasting your fertility, it would be a different matter. I think that you are looking at living together through rose tinted glasses. There's compromises, when you share your space. No relationship is guaranteed, many women see the light, in their late 40s, many men jump ship. I met my DP 52, I see people getting together at our age and older. There's a sense of desperation/projection by your friends. I think that they could be voicing their own fears.

@op there are more than 2 men in the world. Stop ping ponging between these losers

It’s even more uncertain if you don’t plan for it.

I understand some people are happy just to let life ‘happen’ to them. Maybe that’s you, and if so, there’s no problem!
But you need to realise that that is a choice you are making. You COULD make other choices. Not making a decision about what you want, and then working towards that, is a choice in itself.