DP sexual punishment or am I boring?

You are disgusting. Reported.

I don't think they even believe what they're saying. They just want to kick the OP for pleasure, no matter how little sense they make in doing so. Those types are on every single thread. What they want is the OP to be upset and/or tying themselves in knots trying to justify themselves. I'm guessing they get off on the sense of control.

OP, I think you should try to ignore the posters who are telling you that there's something wrong with you because you don't want your consent ignored and you don't want him to look at your body intimately whenever he feels like it. They are missing the point and they just don't get it. I can't imagine that having your experience dismissed and being criticised for your feelings around physical force from your partner are doing your mental health any good. On every single thread, no matter what it is, some posters will make up any reason to get at the OP. Please just be aware that they are out there and they do it to get at you. As if they would like to be forced into doing sex things they don't want to do! You really are best off just ignoring them. It gives them a thrill to know that you've seen their message and are defending yourself against their crazy, irrational made-up criticisms. If it were me, I wouldn't waste my time justifying myself to those posters.

I don’t think @diabolicalbanana will reply to you. The replies only come to the people who have missed the point of the thread.

OP is at serious risk of sexual harm and right now I would bet my house on it becoming worse until she is sexually assaulted or raped unless she leaves.

OP I don’t know if you have seen any of my posts on this thread, but my friend has been through this and I had to help pick up the pieces, unfortunately she ignored the very things that are happening to you. Please see this for what it is and get out now before he can do damage that cannot be undone

This is classic narcissistic behaviour and I hope she gets out before it gets worse !

Exactly ! But I don’t think OP will end it as I don’t think she really sees the situation for how wrong it is ! He will keep doing it and it will prob escalate but OP will normalise it . This is what happens when you are with a narcissist. I have seen it happen to people close to me . I just hope she realises what is happening to her before it gets worse .😞

So are you ending it? You thought his behaviour was wrong and lots of us here have backed you up. What next? There will be another time...are you waiting for that?

I just think he’s a tosser & should be dumped .
She didn’t want him to finish on her face , he went to do it anyway.
She has said she’s not into vids or pics , so respect that, & stop being a prick asking her to do something she has repeatedly said she’s not into .
He sounds like a wanker to me & she will be well rid of him .

She's having her no violated by physical force, he's sexually assaulting her, but for too many here, it's her body confidence that's the problem.

Seriously fucked up.

Exactly. Disturbing.

This is the most fucked up thread .
Majority of women here focusing more on OP & her body confidence than anything else she is saying .

He is grooming you for worse down the line. Men like this never get nicer or more empathetic or kinder, especially once you are tied by property, marriage or kids.

OP, I’m wondering -how old are you?

when my DP and I got together, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. I wouldn’t have had a problem with him seeing me naked - however he would have probably just joined me in the shower!

But we were a lot younger/ thinner etc then!

I think it’s a bit odd you’ll only let him see you naked under soft light, full makeup etc (you wouldn’t be able to maintain that living together).

However I disagree with the rest of his behaviour. I wouldn’t be sending nudes anywhere in this day and age.

Is he called Christian Grey?
I see red flags all over the place, it's hard to know where to start. I don't think it's a good idea to send any nudey pics, stuff like that can be used against you at a later date 😬

What an absolute creep.
He sounds a bit rapey to me.
He certainly doesn't respect you.

You post was not in any way helpful for a woman who has low self esteem.
You opened with 'you need therapy to work on your body image issues' and it read very much like oh he hasn't been great but if you didn't have body image issues then it would be fine.

In the last few weeks he tried to finish on her face even though she made it clear he was not allowed, there have also been 2 incidents where he manhandled her lately when she was clearly panicking and he carried on regardless, but you're trying to minimise here and you're twisting it to make out she wants to end it cos he saw her vagina.

Not everyone has to be “body confident”. Just because I don’t like flashing my foof at my husband doesn’t make me a prude. Some people are more naturally reserved around their bodies than others, and that’s absolutely fine.

She can do both.

I’m really sorry you’re going through this. I just wanted to say that you don’t have to do anything you are not comfortable with, and the posters having a go for you not feeling comfortable being naked in those circumstances need to give their heads a wobble. How can you enjoy sex if you are not comfortable in that moment? You are entitled to feel safe and relaxed and not pressured when you are with your partner. I’m sure he won’t see it this way (because no man likes to see themselves as an abuser) but coercion is a form of abuse.

Agog at the abuse minimiser's and apologists on here. It's so depressing.

Op, it's not you it's him.

If someone’s self esteem is that low I highly doubt they will have the confidence to leave an abusive relationship. Self esteem IS a huge part of driving someone to be able to leave when they are being abused. If you hate yourself to the extent you are far more likely to believe you deserve to be treat badly. Even if she has the courage to leave this guy, without addressing her own issues she will likely just get into another relationship with someone else who is abusive. Women with low self esteem are a sitting target for abusers.