To ask why people think it’s okay to abuse NHS staff?

The irony is quite something isn't it. And that's only after one day of this thread. Yet she can't grasp that after months of being pissed about and spoken to like shit by NHS staff patients are less than cordial because they are distressed and spoken to like shit routinely. Just a straight "that isn't possible" when a wheelchair is requested would infuriate a lot of disabled people. A hospital should be one place on earth that actually understands the challenges faced by disabled people!

The complete inability to make the link, whilst simultaneously beating rude and nasty is quite baffling. If she's one of these shitty NHS staff that talks to her patients like shit like she is doing here no wonder they were rude to her. I often get behind on my appointments because the staff are so rude I just don't want to deal with them so out it off too long. Then I get berated for that too!

I’m disabled.

you’d be surprised (or maybe you wouldn’t, I don’t know) at how absolutely shit access for disabled people is.

i have been told by many many people that wheelchairs cannot be accommodated, that it isn’t possible for me to access the train/plane/cafe etc.

i have been told that although they have a disabled loo it isn’t wheelchair accessible, that although the bus does have a ramp for wheelchair users it’s too much faff to get it out etc.

seriously, you were asked about booking a wheelchair and you replied “that’s not possible?”

that’s on you and I’m personally ashamed at your response and I’d hope that anyone would have more empathy than to simply say that.

that isn’t conveying information. That’s being obstructive and unhelpful and I can quite see why the person got upset.

It's not acceptable, but people who are angry, desperate and scared sometimes shout at the first person they come across.

When I had to spent hours on end in A&E with my 85 year old mum who had end stage pancreatic cancer, I really had to hold it together not to completely lose my marbles.

I used to work in a job where we were told if someone was abusive you’d firstly warn them you’d end the call if they carried on.

Sorry, you told someone it wasn’t possible to book a wheelchair for them?

I’m not surprised they got abusive.

Yes, quite.

Ironically, the OP is becoming stressed and upset and lashing out a bit at other posters.

I'm a nurse and we get this on the phone, but our admin support, who field the calls, get it much worse. They don't get paid enough for this shit. We do have the yellow/amber/red card system at our hospital. Red card means you get banned! We are not putting up with it anymore. Funnily enough people are like little lambs when they come back after the ban. So, in a lot of cases, they blimmin well can help it!

Op, your upset at the abuse yor received, however, the responses you are now giving are starting to push similar boundaries by becoming defensive and nasty.

Im not upset by it at all but maybe you need to think about why your getting this defensive and address it,it may help you understand what makes you tick, if the tone is coming across like this on here, imagine what the patients are picking up from you.

Like I said, people have a lot going on in theor lives, for all I know, you might to and it could be affecting how you perceive things and react to it.

I agree with you completely

There we go. A patient having a stressful time trying to get help from the NHS, which is what you're there for. Helping them shouldn't be something they have to be grateful for. Of course they shouldn't abuse you and we don't know the exact circumstances, but people's experience of the NHS and many of the staff is very frustrating, so you're unfortunately paying for that, for their previous experiences, as well as whatever you did or didn't do.

It's interesting because I have a friend who works in an admin role with cancer patients on the NHS. She is a person who loves people, is relentlessly positive and really gets how stressful life is for "her" patients . She reports that whilst her colleagues often get abuse, she very rarely does.

Maybe, just maybe, the defensive attitude you're displaying here does come across OP?

interesting thread. The NHS is really scary. It's like a beautifully painted stage set with nothing behind it.

The way we are going it'll get to a stage where if you are ill you'll just die in misery and/or end up with your body curtailed by it. There's nothing and no one to help you. Just a bunch of doctors who move you from list to list. They'll fix up an obvious broken bone but no capacity for anything else.

Especially old people - my experience so far is the systems don't give a shiny shit about old people. Not even old actually - mildly aged.

The cynic in me wonders if this is deliberate. The social care bill for an ageing population is going to be massive.

Anyway - no it wasnt acceptable for the caller to speak to the OP like that, but people see the NHS and are scared.

I just read your response above mine to another poster, and I can see where their anger came from. I would have approached this differently than you did.

I would not have presumed that they did not have a seriously ill loved one, as I am aware that people have more going on in their lives than what is presented in front of me, and I would have shown some empathy for their situation and tried to try and minimise their frustration.

From how your post is written, you may have dealt with it very simplistically, within strict procedural guidelines based on the little information you had for the appointment they were attending and failed to show any empathy or reassurance. Even without other stressors, the approach you describe you took would make me quietly seethe!

Some of its lack of trust. After the Nottingham maternity scandal.people.realise that some people working in the NH S are bad at the blanket job and actively unempafhetic. It' is is v them.

if you h are in pain and you are experiencing sub standard service maybe some of the rudeness is inacceptbale.

I work in an area where I can get a lot of abuse from people, and I agree, it's not acceptable.

However, I understand my job very well and understand that I'm part of a process which can be exceptionally stressful and even traumatic for some people. I can therefore understand that the strain can cause them to act irrationally at times and misdirect their anger, upset and frustration at me.

I have also experienced things where I have been in situations similar to theirs and can understand that their anger can come from a multitude of little things that have built up over a long time, and whilst not life-threatening, the impact is still huge, and as a very resilient and resourceful person, I have been very surprised at how it has impacted me and my behaviour.

A lot of posters on here, whilst accepting that this behaviour is not acceptable, can empathise with the build-up of multiple stressors in life and the straw that breaks the camel's back, which means that despite that behaviour being unacceptable, people are human, emotions can be very powerful, and it can impact them in ways it wouldn't normally.

Sometimes people work in these areas and either can't see this bigger picture, due to not having experienced it or fully understand the impact of multiple stressors in people's lives, and they can take it very personally, like it's an attack on them because they are just involved in that small part of what's going on, when that small part is that final straw of a bigger issue they are facing and could be the bit that finally breaks them.

This view can understandably cause more frustration and upset for the person they are dealing with, where empathy and understanding with the wider issue could minimise the strain and prevent the anger being targeted at that particular worker.

In roles like this, wider training regarding this could be very useful. My organisation gives it, and it has changed worker attitudes massively, and whilst it doesn't stop it, it does assist in minimising it, improving empathy, understanding, communication, staff resilience and public perception. I've even had people come back and apologise and thank me for my understanding and patience with them. Showing wider understanding and communication are key.

I think just saying that’s not possible is really unhelpful and pretty inflammatory
to somebody with a seriously ill loved one on their hands.

At that point I’d have reassured that if there were mobility needs the hospital would be supportive and get the patient to where he/ she needed to be and if I couldn’t help I’d make sure he was put in touch with somebody who could ( without being put on endless hold with multiple buttons ie I’d transfer them directly).

Not hard and I’m staggered you’ve not had training for this.

It was in my local paper a few weeks ago that a man passed away in the reception of a&e after being ignored by staff....I can see why his family might have gotten abusive.

I'm so sorry. This simply shouldn't happen. It's the lack of recourse for you that really upsets me on your behalf.