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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be annoyed at husband about dislike for friends husband

38 replies

TrishMB · 19/07/2026 20:11

Not sure if this is the appropriate place to post this and not sure what I want from this really but hear me out.
i have become very good friends with a school mum over the last year. We spent a lot of time together with our children and then we introduced our husbands who got on well and we spent a lot of time together as families, day trips, hosting dinners etc. I really enjoyed the dynamic and having friends with kids the same age etc. recently the 2 husbands had a run in. Nothing major, just a misunderstanding about a comment one made to the other. After a few weeks they finally apologised to each other vaguely over text message but still haven’t seen each other. My husband is now saying he doesn’t like the other guy and doesn’t want to spend time with them anymore. I’m really annoyed as I enjoyed our family friendships and I also don’t want it to impact my relationship with the other mum or the children to be affected. I guess I’m just asking what you would do in this situation?

OP posts:
Foughties · 19/07/2026 21:38

I think it does depend on the comment. If it wasn't too bad I would cajole him into another meet up and see what happened, but ot does depend on what went down.

AvidWasp · 19/07/2026 21:35

I’d carry on seeing the other mum if your friendship is important to you. Not every friendship has to be between two couples.
Your husband doesn’t have to spend time with someone he doesn’t gel with, but that doesn’t mean you and the children have to lose a friendship over it. I’d just keep things separate for now and see how it settles.

pictoosh · 19/07/2026 21:34

Who made the comment?
Dh or 'Steve'.

PinkNailPolish2026 · 19/07/2026 21:27

They’re adults and your DH can make his own decisions about who he spends time with, I wouldn’t be spending time with someone I didn’t like nor would I expect my DH to. Spend time with your friend and the children alone, your DH doesn’t need to be involved.

pinkdyno · 19/07/2026 21:21

Hard to know without the comment.

but like PP said if it was his work friend and you and wife had disagreement could it be fixed that easily?

TrishMB · 19/07/2026 21:17

I guess it’s because we spent a lot of time together as families and i miss that, as do the kids and they ask why such and such aren’t coming round anymore or why we aren’t doing activities together anymore. I don’t know what to tell them

OP posts:
Didimum · 19/07/2026 20:49

Lot of people are friends without a couple friendship – the majority I would definitely say. I don’t see why you would think this had to affect anything with you and your friend or the kids.

PhilosophicalCheeseSandwich · 19/07/2026 20:22

The honeymoon period of having a new friend is over, and they've realised they're not actually that keen on each other. Leave them be, they don't have to force it to make their wives happy and nothing changes for you.

Arregaithel · 19/07/2026 20:21

@TrishMB how would you feel if you'd fallen out with the Mum in this situation and your husband was equally as dismissive?

PeasandMozzarella · 19/07/2026 20:20

Have a one-on-one friendship with the woman. You can go dragging people who don’t like one another into couple friendships just because it suits you!

Coralsunset · 19/07/2026 20:19

Nothing. Would you want to feel bullied into staying friends with someone you dislike?

Just see your friend without partners.

UpDownAllAround1 · 19/07/2026 20:19

Continue the friendship with the other mum and the kids.

WorkCleanRepeat · 19/07/2026 20:18

There's not a lot you can do. Your husband doesn't have to spend time.with someone he doesn't like.

It shouldn't have to affect the children's friendship. Might be a bit awkward for you and the other Mum briefly but im sure that will pass.