AIBU to challenge OUT OF CONTROL parents group chat?

I'm on 2 group chats, and they can get a bit too chatty. I don't have notifications on for them, I just see the messages when I go on WhatsApp for other reasons (which is pretty regularly anyway).

This is why I am not part of any school / parent WhatsApp group
Easy solution Leave the group or put it on silent

don't like them? Don't join them.
It's not that hard

The school needn't police any chat on a day to day basis, but they do need to set out some basic principles at the outset.
no they really don't. You are an adult, you don't need the school office to hold your hand and manage everything for you.

You CAN stop it displaying on your phone - you just need to mute notifications for that chat. I have some groups like that - where messages sometimes come in at inconvenient times for me - so I just mute those groups.

On an Iphone you go into WA, click on the group name at the top, go into settings - there you can control notifications for that one chat.

Christ this is the problem with people who don’t know how to use their phones properly!
I’m part of 2 incredibly active chats, I tend to message late at night, some of the others message at 5am because that’s when their toddler wakes up!

my phone is set to DO NOT DISTURB from 22:00 - 8:00 everyday. All notifications are silenced apart from my mum and dad’s numbers if they call, and my daughter’s medical alarms. Everything else - silenced!

You can also ‘archive’ the chat which means you won’t get any alerts at all but can open it and read whenever you want to.

what you don’t do is announce you’re leaving because of X Y & Z…. Nothing more annoying that people who do this..

Also don’t mention to the school as doubt they run the group.. these things are usually run by a well meaning parent

Just mute it like a normal persona and open at your own convenience.

Do you really think bits possible for people with full time jobs, morning and evening care responsibilities AND the extra tasks of volunteering should really be thinking about your preferred business hours because you can't mute, ignore or archive?

People are being unreasonable to overuse it and you are not being unreasonable to feel annoyed.

But the fact you find it difficult to cope with receiving non urgent WhatsApps that don’t require any action on your part could be a sign that you are overwhelmed.

You would be unreasonable to complain or ask for it to be policed.

There's nothing to suggest this group is a key communication channel for the school though.

But let's assume they were. There's also no basis to presume the people currently providing volunteer labour to the PTA in a way that suits them are going to be fine with turning into what's app group managers, to benefit people who refuse to use their settings properly.

Well I'm with you OP! Sounds a nightmare
It's completely ridiculous to have a group chat with 90 people in it. If this is a key communication channel for the school then YES they are involved and do have to set out some clear principles on what such groups are for and expectations around how they are used.
Surely one chat per class, managed by the class rep(s), is enough. With a separate chat group between the PTA and the class reps so that messages are cascaded down. The school needn't police any chat on a day to day basis, but they do need to set out some basic principles at the outset.

Why? Is nobody in the group young enough to figure out how to turn on Do Not Disturb?

In our school the class reps set up the WhatsApp groups for each class and then moderate them. There is no year group WhatsApp which surely isn’t needed anyway? I used to try and read them but there are just too many so tune it all out now - I agree it can get really over the top.

but then youll get others who then say why is messages at x time etc

The problem with that is you have to find someone who agrees with you enough to ask, when unwilling to do it yourself, and also there needs to be some attempt to enforce any requests. Otherwise people will continue to do whatever they like.

It's actually quite a significant ask of other people, particularly if they've shown no signs they agree with you. I'm an admin of a parents what's app, much smaller than OPs though, and I would not be impressed if someone thought I ought to do this. If it's that ideal a solution, OP can have the baby and then organise and provide the labour for this herself (no pun intended).

Just mute the chat, if you want a complete break archive it. Lots of people in class group chats have it on mute, it's easy to tell who they are, they reply to messages, party invites etc about once a fortnight. If you don't need the reminders etc and are pretty on it I'd just leave it archived personally.

It isn't school's job to police adult's in a whatsapp group. People will post when it is convenient for them, lots of people work shifts so they will post at odd times, if you have your phone on silent at night as most people do messages at weird times have 0 impact.

that one is the ideal solution

yes but then its not necessarly them who moderate the groups behaviours

Just mute the chat and don’t look it unless you need to.

Don't all groups have Administrators? Not a "Boss" as such but technically running the group.

Our local WhatsApp groups ask people not to message at unsocial hours, they can always send a personal message to a friend if it's urgent.

but who would choose who is boss of the group @SySy7

Good on you these group chats are crazy thats what emails and letters are for leave yourself out the group they can drain the life out of you.. your sanity is far more important txtn at 6am on a weekend absolutely get a grip

I just refuse to do WhatsApp (anti Fb/ Zuckerberg protest!) and I suspect I’ve not missed much.

You can mute individual chats.

Just mute them or remove yourself, you can't ask a school to regulate parent WhatsApp groups they have no control over!

Yeah archive the chat for sure. I think most people assume that kind of group chat is archived so are less worried about others feeling harassed.