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Original poster

Do I pay for all their coffees and drinks?

244 replies

Argentinasnargentina · 16/07/2026 21:23

Dd’s birthday party this weekend. It’s at a soft play/activity type place. It’s three hours long and will include lunch provided by the establishment-pizzas, cheeseburgers, sweets, fruit platter, water and juices, cupcakes etc.
There are ten children coming with parents, the place has a cafe/coffee bar selling drinks & snacks.
As we’re hosting, what do I do? I feel
a bit uncomfortable with parents coming and having to buy their own coffee and cold drinks but the other option to have it open and we pay the bill at the end scares me a bit!
The party with all food included and an entertainer coming has cost a lot and the lunch will be plentiful

Not sure what to do?

OP posts:
DoneWithMIL · 17/07/2026 06:17

Parents buy their own drinks and food. You only need to provide food and drink for the children

GisGasGus · 17/07/2026 06:16

MalteserGeezee · 17/07/2026 05:26

Start a tab, it's a very hospitable gesture. Never comes to very much (think it added about £20 to our bill) and nobody took the piss

How many coffees was that ? 5?

Do you have very small parties or soft plays with very cheap prices 😂

I don't think i ever went to a party at a venue where the parents got a free drink
It's been a while but I can't even imagine how a tab would work in a soft play where multiple parties are happening at the same time in a chaotic environment

feministAI · 17/07/2026 06:12

I have always got my own and never expected party parents to pay

supercrone · 17/07/2026 06:12

WhatTheHellsGoingOn · 17/07/2026 03:30

I went to a party recently in a similar situation and I hadn’t brought any money bc I’d assumed drinks for parents would be laid on for free, I’d never been there before. They were not and it was shite watching my kid play for 2 hours, knowing only the bday kids parent and not being able to sit with a drink to feel a bit less awkward and pass the time.

Show quote history

I don't think two hours without a coffee is much of a hardship. Plus, you have now learned what the norm is at these events.

GisGasGus · 17/07/2026 06:11

WhatTheHellsGoingOn · 17/07/2026 03:30

I went to a party recently in a similar situation and I hadn’t brought any money bc I’d assumed drinks for parents would be laid on for free, I’d never been there before. They were not and it was shite watching my kid play for 2 hours, knowing only the bday kids parent and not being able to sit with a drink to feel a bit less awkward and pass the time.

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So party parents should stump up for coffees for who knows how many accompanying parents because you go out without money?

Are you normally entitled?

UpDownAllAround1 · 17/07/2026 06:11

Would expect to pay for my own hot drinks as a parent

supercrone · 17/07/2026 06:09

I would expect to buy my own

Moonnstarz · 17/07/2026 05:58

I have never been to a party at a soft play or experience setting where parents have been offered a drink. Usually if parents are staying they buy their own drinks (and food) if they want anything.

The only parties I know where drinks are offered are when people hire a hall and have access to a kitchen so can easily (and cheaply) offer tea/coffee.

Spottyvases · 17/07/2026 05:37

The OP could theoretically have 20 adults coming in addition to the children!

Spottyvases · 17/07/2026 05:36

MalteserGeezee · 17/07/2026 05:26

Start a tab, it's a very hospitable gesture. Never comes to very much (think it added about £20 to our bill) and nobody took the piss

Hehe - £20? Wowzers - that's like 5 x coffees now. I'm guessing your party was a few years ago.

Spottyvases · 17/07/2026 05:34

Don't pay for the coffees/teas. No one would expect that!

MalteserGeezee · 17/07/2026 05:26

Start a tab, it's a very hospitable gesture. Never comes to very much (think it added about £20 to our bill) and nobody took the piss

Glitchymn1 · 17/07/2026 03:38

People buy their own.
Sometimes they’ll do jugs of coffee /tea.
Take bottled water
Don’t open a tab! Slushes, crisps, choc, can add up quickly!

WhatTheHellsGoingOn · 17/07/2026 03:30

Argentinasnargentina · 16/07/2026 21:28

There will be juice and water at lunchtime at 12, but party starts at 10.30 and parents will most likely want a coffee/drink, it feels awkward that they should go and pay for this at the bar 😬 i’d like to offer them refreshments

Show quote history

I went to a party recently in a similar situation and I hadn’t brought any money bc I’d assumed drinks for parents would be laid on for free, I’d never been there before. They were not and it was shite watching my kid play for 2 hours, knowing only the bday kids parent and not being able to sit with a drink to feel a bit less awkward and pass the time.

PeonyBulb · 17/07/2026 03:23

The norm is for people to buy their own coffee if they want it. They probably won’t tbh. I wouldn’t give it a second thought. If they’re thirsty they’ll just drink the water provided

Bowies · 17/07/2026 02:06

Find out how much it would be to cover their first drink, but don’t run an open tab if you can’t afford to.

twocornichons · 17/07/2026 01:14

make a little coffee token and pay for a coffee each

Jopo12 · 17/07/2026 01:01

It wouldn't occur to me to pay for parents' drinks at a kids party. Every single one I've been to parents paid for their own refreshments

Dragonflyspeeding · 17/07/2026 00:53

I always offered to buy a coffee for the parents who stayed.
Some said yes and others said they would buy their own.
I think its nice to offer
The coffee in these places isn't particularly good and they don't charge Starbuck's prices either.

Asmileisworthathousandwords · 17/07/2026 00:52

I don't think they would expect you to.
It's a while since my kids were that age but we always bought our own drinks at parties.

SeaAndSangria · 17/07/2026 00:43

I've been to zillions of soft play parties like this over the years with both my kids, and I'd never have assumed that drinks for me were paid for.
I mean, obviously it's nice if they are but it's never expected! It's always been parents get their own drinks in my experience.
It's a party for the kids, not the parents. As long as they're catered for, that's the main thing 🙂

Trainup · 17/07/2026 00:36

You are feeding and entertaining their kid for 2 hours… what kind of freeloader would need a coffee paid for too?!

fivepastmidnight · 17/07/2026 00:30

I used to have my son's party at a farm which was a bit in the middle of nowhere but great for kids. I did pay for a tea or coffee for the parents because most of them stayed rather than going there and back and the farm didn't rip you Off price wise. However a normal soft play where it's relatively easy for people to just drop off and return, parents who did stay bought their own drinks. even a small coffee at these places aren't that inexpensive and having a tab will quickly boost your bill.

Bestfootforward11 · 17/07/2026 00:13

I’ve been to lots of these kind of parties. On some occasions the hosts got a coffee/drink for parents when they arrived, other times I bought myself. I always went expecting to get my own as I know how expensive these parties are x

BatteriesNotIncluded76 · 17/07/2026 00:09

I voted yabu to think of paying for parents, they should definitely get their own.
At our local soft play they provide jugs of squash from start to end of party.

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