Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think the UK should have bidets

473 replies

LarkspurBlues · 16/07/2026 13:27

Just that really. I far prefer the French habit of having a wash after having a no 2, much more civilised. The British way is actually unhygienic and gross.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
beebee25 · 16/07/2026 19:48

WisdomBiscuit · 16/07/2026 13:39

Poo shouldn’t be messy, maybe look at your diet if it is.

Water alone won’t clean you properly either, you’d need to wash with soap for that.

Show quote history

If you have IBS poo is very messy. Maybe we're not like you with your perfect poos!

Mumto4loveliesxx · 16/07/2026 19:47

bigboykitty · 16/07/2026 13:36

There is, actually. Bidets are not permitted in the UK under plumbing regulations because of 'backflow' issues.

Show quote history

But I do know people who have them, and they don’t all look that old.

MoHarris · 16/07/2026 19:39

I don’t know anyone in France who has one. Maybe a few of the older houses do. But im sure it’s something like 60% of homes don’t have them in France.

Aluna · 16/07/2026 19:36

I’m half Italian & I’ve lived in France. Most Italians have bidets and they’ve been mandated in new builds since the 70’s, but they’re less common in France.

Tedsnan1 · 16/07/2026 19:34

LarkspurBlues · 16/07/2026 13:38

Yes not a public bidet. I do what you do too. I just wish everyone else did also.

Show quote history

You wish everyone would time their poos to first thing before a shower??!!
Rather unreasonable. Timing isn't something we have control over, or have I missed something?

IStillHearTheWaves · 16/07/2026 19:27

LarkspurBlues · 16/07/2026 13:36

Because it doesn’t really get it clean. I can’t think of any other messy thing you’d wipe with a dry cloth. It’s an inefficient system we have.

Show quote history

What the hell are you passing? Sounds like a, digestive issue and not at all typical...

Ansjovis · 16/07/2026 19:25

I recently visited several countries in South America and you can't flush toilet paper there so all the toilets had hoses next to them. Was a bit weirded out by them at first but it didn't take too long to convert me.

vodkaredbullgirl · 16/07/2026 19:10

TheYorkshirePudding · 16/07/2026 19:05

This must be a joke

Show quote history

Of course it's a joke 🤣

TheYorkshirePudding · 16/07/2026 19:05

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 16/07/2026 13:29

I don't have a bidet but we do keep a flannel and a bucket next to our bathroom toilet. After a number 2 we have a good scrub then rinse it out for the next person. Not quite as good but we all manage to keep clean enough.

This must be a joke

HostaCentral · 16/07/2026 19:00

stargirl27 · 16/07/2026 17:17

I do think it's simple... I don't know of anyone filling them up and sitting in there though.

Show quote history

Has none ever had a sitz bath?? Yes, you fill the bowl and sit in it. Just like you would a bath, only it's just for your bum. Or, you can just use the tap to swish your bits, or some bidets have squirty showers heads fixed to the bottom that you sit over which is even better and quite fun. But, you also are not sitting in a soup of shit, because you have wiped your arse first, obviously!

Also, I have never seen nor heard of anyone showering off after a bath ..... Really.

CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone · 16/07/2026 18:59

LarkspurBlues · 16/07/2026 13:38

Yes not a public bidet. I do what you do too. I just wish everyone else did also.

Show quote history

Why do you care about other people's bums so much?

Everyone seems to have 2 layers between their bum and the outside world and I've not noticed a whole world of stinky bums out there.

Do you have a problem with yours, because I find mine stays clean after a poo and a wipe.

Calliopespa · 16/07/2026 18:56

I do remember a girl at school telling me rather authoritatively (for a 14 year old) that the French had bidets because they were "always having sex in the daytime" and had to rush back to work without time for a shower. A bidet meant they could douche their bits so their spouse couldn't detect any foul play.

Flumposie3 · 16/07/2026 18:54

I've had a stoma since having emergency surgery last November. This thread is making me nostalgic 🤣

Calliopespa · 16/07/2026 18:53

Vaxtable · 16/07/2026 18:41

None of my French friends have them

you want one get one

They are less and less common in France and I think that is because they date from when people didn't shower once or twice a day.

Calliopespa · 16/07/2026 18:52

NotBreezy · 16/07/2026 16:17

Washing with water removes germs that wiping doesn’t. If you got poo on your hand, would a quick wipe be enough or would you prefer to use water? I can’t believe I am having to spell this out!

And re other countries’ toilets, a quick google will tell you that there are health benefits to squat toilets. Don’t dismiss all poorer countries as being worse. Our nice UK toilets cater to our modern sensibilities. I prefer them. But they are not necessarily better in every way. Open your mind a bit.

Show quote history

Actually I think squat toilets do more than open your mind a bit. Don't they help open your bowels?

Vaxtable · 16/07/2026 18:41

None of my French friends have them

you want one get one

Katemax82 · 16/07/2026 18:24

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 16/07/2026 13:29

I don't have a bidet but we do keep a flannel and a bucket next to our bathroom toilet. After a number 2 we have a good scrub then rinse it out for the next person. Not quite as good but we all manage to keep clean enough.

Ewww

godmum56 · 16/07/2026 18:07

LarkspurBlues · 16/07/2026 13:38

Yes not a public bidet. I do what you do too. I just wish everyone else did also.

Show quote history

not sure why you care about other people's bums?

ThisISmycircusandtheseAREmymonkeys · 16/07/2026 17:59

LuckyHazelFox · 16/07/2026 17:58

Have the rules of AIBU changed?

Show quote history

Ah sorry, I thought you meant to quote someone but forgot. 😂 I was just joking.

LuckyHazelFox · 16/07/2026 17:58

ThisISmycircusandtheseAREmymonkeys · 16/07/2026 17:54

Talking to yourself is never a good sign.

Show quote history

Have the rules of AIBU changed?

Ablushingcrow · 16/07/2026 17:58

I live in france and I honestly don't know anyone that has a bidet.

ThisISmycircusandtheseAREmymonkeys · 16/07/2026 17:54

LuckyHazelFox · 16/07/2026 17:52

Nobody is forcing you to stay in the gross UK.

Talking to yourself is never a good sign.

LuckyHazelFox · 16/07/2026 17:52

Nobody is forcing you to stay in the gross UK.

ThisISmycircusandtheseAREmymonkeys · 16/07/2026 17:49

Possiblynever · 16/07/2026 17:36

Bum gun 😂. .I have a water pistol, that'll have to do.

Certain ketchup bottles are the best water pistols, just putting it out there!

Edit to say empty from ketchup that is.

ThisISmycircusandtheseAREmymonkeys · 16/07/2026 17:48

MustTryHarderAndHarder · 16/07/2026 17:31

Oops sorry, but the whole thread is about bums and poo, so I didn't think my comment was too bad!

Show quote history

Just joking, anything goes on this thread it seems 😂