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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbour and his england flag!

162 replies

incrediblyincredible · 15/07/2026 10:30

Our NDN are both 80, and we don’t have the best relationship with them, we feel they can be a bit inconsiderate in terms of boundary noise. We’ve had to mention a couple of things which have affected the enjoyment of our home. So we don’t really speak anymore and they have clearly taken offence despite us mentioning things in a polite way.

Anyway, the man has put up a large England flag on a pole on the joining fence. It’s right at the front of the house and the pole isn’t particularly high so the flag flaps in our faces or visitors faces when they open our gate to go down our walkway. This morning I got pissed off with it as the wind is always blowing our way so the flag is always over our boundary and it looks like it’s our flag as a result (just to add I love football and have no issues with the flag itself, just the positioning of it).
So this morning I wrapped it round the pole and opened my gate to make a point that it’s a walkway.
Anyway, I was sat in my living room and I heard the man come out and say “someone’s wrapped that up!” In an angry loud voice.
AIBU to think that he should realise it’s a bit inconsiderate and could put the flag in an area that doesn’t hang over our boundary?

OP posts:
Littlebitpsycho · 15/07/2026 12:08

BeanQuisine · 15/07/2026 11:09

There'll always be an England,
Where the High Street drinker begs,
And shoppers in their PJs pause
To fill their gobs with Greggs.

This made me laugh way more than it should have

Bigpaintinglittlepainting · 15/07/2026 12:07

We have neighbours like this and I guarantee he’s done it to aggravate. It’s like they can’t help themselves, if it was me I would ignore it and rise above. It’s the only joy they get, by being a little bit irritating and unreasonable.

EasternStandard · 15/07/2026 12:05

Goinggonegone · 15/07/2026 11:13

Seeing as it bothers you, just ask him politely would.he mind flying it somewhere it doesn't flap in your visitors' faces. No need for drama or passive aggression.

Yep

Gall10 · 15/07/2026 11:53

FrenchandSaunders · 15/07/2026 10:52

I'd chop it down ...

I’ll help!

INX · 15/07/2026 11:50

incrediblyincredible · 15/07/2026 11:44

See now I’m feeling terribly guilty about him knowing we/I tied the flag up. Despite knowing I would never hand a flag on a property boundary where there’s a walkway, but still I feel guilty.

It's not like you set it on fire and rammed the pole up his arse 🤷‍♂️

moltopianissimo · 15/07/2026 11:48

BeanQuisine · 15/07/2026 11:09

There'll always be an England,
Where the High Street drinker begs,
And shoppers in their PJs pause
To fill their gobs with Greggs.

Betjeman?

Nanda66 · 15/07/2026 11:47

I couldn’t get worked up about this. The World Cup will be over on Sunday. It’s really not that big a deal.

incrediblyincredible · 15/07/2026 11:44

See now I’m feeling terribly guilty about him knowing we/I tied the flag up. Despite knowing I would never hand a flag on a property boundary where there’s a walkway, but still I feel guilty.

OP posts:
MyJollyFish · 15/07/2026 11:41

Is this really that important. Blimey.

MickyMoonshine · 15/07/2026 11:41

FrenchandSaunders · 15/07/2026 10:52

I'd chop it down ...

Why?

Flamingojune · 15/07/2026 11:29

StrongandNorthern · 15/07/2026 11:11

I'd leave it for now. They're enjoying the World Cup and all the excitement which goes with it.Their flag is their way of feeling 'involved' (they may be 80 - but probably still feel like they did when England last won, if that makes sense).
Why not let them fly the flag and enjoy the next few hours/days?
You could even build a few bridges - chat to them about it, share their enthusiasm ... may have positive results for all of you in the future.
Just an idea ...

A really good way of feeling involved is watching the match

Lemonandlimetrees · 15/07/2026 11:27

@BauhausOfEliott 😂😂
What else do you think she means by 'England flag'? A picture of Mr Blobby and a Gregg's?

There you are OP, Bauhaus has given you the answer for your own England flag just in front of his, flapping over it.

BeanQuisine · 15/07/2026 11:19

StrongandNorthern · 15/07/2026 11:11

I'd leave it for now. They're enjoying the World Cup and all the excitement which goes with it.Their flag is their way of feeling 'involved' (they may be 80 - but probably still feel like they did when England last won, if that makes sense).
Why not let them fly the flag and enjoy the next few hours/days?
You could even build a few bridges - chat to them about it, share their enthusiasm ... may have positive results for all of you in the future.
Just an idea ...

She could break the ice by kicking a football through their front window, then knocking on the door and saying, "Please Mister, can I 'ave my football back?"

Then they could all chat about the World Cup while she helps them clear up the broken glass.

Fluffyholeysocks · 15/07/2026 11:18

I"m jealous that you are getting enough wind to make a flag erected at head height to flap. We haven't had to so much as a slight breeze. But on the other hand, it must be annoying that it only seems to blow in your direction when visitors are coming to your property. Your have my sympathy.

Goinggonegone · 15/07/2026 11:13

Seeing as it bothers you, just ask him politely would.he mind flying it somewhere it doesn't flap in your visitors' faces. No need for drama or passive aggression.

StrongandNorthern · 15/07/2026 11:11

I'd leave it for now. They're enjoying the World Cup and all the excitement which goes with it.Their flag is their way of feeling 'involved' (they may be 80 - but probably still feel like they did when England last won, if that makes sense).
Why not let them fly the flag and enjoy the next few hours/days?
You could even build a few bridges - chat to them about it, share their enthusiasm ... may have positive results for all of you in the future.
Just an idea ...

C8H10N4O2 · 15/07/2026 11:09

incrediblyincredible · 15/07/2026 10:35

I’m just thinking if we win the World Cup it’ll be up for ages. Plus the 3rd place play off. Also we’d be looking at the same issue again in 2 years with the euros etc etc

Have you actually told him its causing you a problem and eg offered to help him put it a bit higher?

BeanQuisine · 15/07/2026 11:09

BauhausOfEliott · 15/07/2026 10:48

Of course she means the St George cross, which is the flag of England. What else do you think she means by 'England flag'? A picture of Mr Blobby and a Gregg's?

OP, absolutely YANBU. If it's hanging over your property, they're dickheads.

There'll always be an England,
Where the High Street drinker begs,
And shoppers in their PJs pause
To fill their gobs with Greggs.

MrsPapillon · 15/07/2026 11:08

Nannyfannybanny · 15/07/2026 10:37

Do you mean the St George Cross?

What difference does it make if it’s a St George’s cross or another flag with ‘England’ on it? It’s still flapping over her boundary. Why ask?

Fluffyholeysocks · 15/07/2026 10:59

FrenchandSaunders · 15/07/2026 10:52

I'd chop it down ...

Why? Wouldn"t you speak to the 80 year old neighbours first and try and resolve the minor issue of the flag 'flapping in peoples faces' amicably?

PollyBell · 15/07/2026 10:59

Nannyfannybanny · 15/07/2026 10:37

Do you mean the St George Cross?

There is another England flag? Since when?

ShutupLwren · 15/07/2026 10:57

BauhausOfEliott · 15/07/2026 10:48

Of course she means the St George cross, which is the flag of England. What else do you think she means by 'England flag'? A picture of Mr Blobby and a Gregg's?

OP, absolutely YANBU. If it's hanging over your property, they're dickheads.

If Greggs did a flag I would absolutely fly it.
oh and Kerry Katona. Nothing screams patriotism like a Bavarian slice and atomic kitten 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

FrenchandSaunders · 15/07/2026 10:52

I'd chop it down ...

BauhausOfEliott · 15/07/2026 10:48

Nannyfannybanny · 15/07/2026 10:37

Do you mean the St George Cross?

Of course she means the St George cross, which is the flag of England. What else do you think she means by 'England flag'? A picture of Mr Blobby and a Gregg's?

OP, absolutely YANBU. If it's hanging over your property, they're dickheads.

INX · 15/07/2026 10:43

Nannyfannybanny · 15/07/2026 10:37

Do you mean the St George Cross?

As opposed to what?

There is only one England flag and yes, it is the St George Cross?