Old lady keeps approaching my toddler, making me feel uncomfortable

Agreed. 👍

I would be absolutely fine with this. Toddlers like to explore. They are discovering the world.
Of course they go up to people and touch.

Do you want a toddler you don't know coming up to you, touching and removing your hat without even asking? If not then maybe we shouldn't be doing this to them.

Touching, no not alright but absolutely fine to chat to children, it makes them far more grounded individuals if they are used to a wide range of people in their community. I talk to local children, but do not touch

And related to this, children are not learning how to assess. A healthy way of interacting would be notice that mum is friendly and very brisk with one person, warm and lets another hold hands and crosses the road to avoid some people. Stranger danger is problematic.

So much for 'it takes a village'. I find it quite sad that you lack the humanity to take pleasure in the fact that a stranger, in a public place, is cheered up by seeing your child. It's such a simple, human experience. But it makes you uncomfortable. The problem is you, I think, not the slightly eccentric older woman. As for touching in this context, a child isn't his or her parents' personal property. Does your toddler look uncomfortable? If they do, that changes things and I would gently move him away.

Do you really want to raise a child who feels revolted by the touch of others? Why do you feel uncomfortable? Transfer of germs or disease? Possessiveness over your toddler? Fear of violence?

What happens when you child goes to nursery or school and a teacher touches them? What happens when your child is asked to hold the hand of another child to stand in line at school? At a health appointment? If they learn a musical instrument? If they want to play rugby or learn to box? You are at risk of teaching your child that touch by another adult is something negative. Often, it's a necessary part of normal everyday interactions. (I'm not going to venture into the abnormal.)

Yeah, you can laugh all you want but if someone says "please dont touch my child", it wouldn't enter my head to override that and touch them anyway. Clearly you would touch the child reagrdless, and so we just have to agree to disagree.

Asking for your baby not to be touched by a stranger means you're a murderer? Are you ok?

It’s generational. Even 30 years ago in london I couldn’t take my babies out without attention, including silver. I can’t remember whether they were touched because I’m not particularly physically aware.
I understand why you’re weirded out op but I think it’s really sad.

Exactly. And we don't touch strangers and remove their hats. Thats not an appropriate way of making friends.

When DGS was a newborn an older lady approached DDIL in the supermarket saying “did I just see you with a baby?” DDIL said she had and asked if she’d like to meet him (DS2 had taken him to another aisle to get something) so she phoned DS2 and told him to come back. The lady was absolutely thrilled, they had a chat then parted ways.

2 and a half years on they bump into each other on occasion and the lady always comments on how DGS has grown etc. DGS can talk really well so he will tell her what he’s buying or where he’s been.

Both DDIL and DS2 are nurses so are acutely aware of social isolation and its effects, especially in the elderly. They don’t think this woman is going to run off with DGS, it’s just a friendly chat with someone else who lives in the same village, that’s all.

You can get a sense of whether people are a danger. If this is just a little old lady who enjoys seeing your child, and probably others too then that hardly makes her a danger and your reaction is therefore OTT.
I'm all for teaching our kids about stranger danger but imagine a world where we don't ever speak or interact with anyone outside our circle of family and friends.

Ah, ageism.

Watch out op, being older than most people on the road, it'll come to you too.

Don't you honestly see the difference in your situation and the OP!?

I'm not exhausted in the least, why would I be? I just don't think the OP is BU, you do, that's fine.

Everyone in your life- except your parents and siblings- were strangers to begin with. Children are learning how to interact with people they meet in the world and make friendships and connections.

The toddler and lady don't know each other. So yes a stranger.

Ah yes, a normal human interaction with a baby redefined by Mumsnet as "touching strangers".

My mum was a hairdresser when I was a baby/toddler and also had separated from my dad. This was just before min wage was introduced (thanks Labour) so she didn’t earn enough to pay for childcare and I had to go with her to work.

She worked in a little salon old ladies frequented for their perms. I have fond memories of a couple of them who would take me to their house for tea sometimes after getting their hair cut, or take me to the corner shop for chocolate.

Imagine if she’d been precious enough to deny these sweet old ladies the pleasure of my company incase they wanted to hurt me in some way. They were literally 80+ on mobility scooters and lonely, I kept them company.

OFFS that has to be the stupidest post I have ever seen on here, which is really saying something.

Feel sorry for her. I’m sure she’s just lonely and who knows, maybe your son brightens her day up a little- he might make her think of her own children.

Does it?

Where do you think it starts? parents telling their children to be rude to the elderly.

Same, it's hilarious & I actually think it's a wind up. 😂
Having said that I've just posted a reply saying when I was 17 I described someone at 32 as old 😂

Ah yes, that normal human interaction of touching strangers and trying to remove their hats. I don't just think its the lunatics on MN. But feel free to approach hat wearers in public and see what reaction you get.