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Can cake really be offensive?

190 replies

ThisWildHedgehog · 13/07/2026 11:23

Can cake really be offensive?

So my husband bought a really nice celebration cake over the weekend. It was large, cost £20, and was absolutely delicious, but there was too much for us to eat without some going to waste.

As we were seeing my MIL, FIL and SIL, I cut the cake in half and took it round to them in the box.

My only thought was, “It’s a lovely cake, and there’s enough to share.”

When I gave it to my MIL, I said, “We’ve brought you this cake because it’s really lovely and there’s enough to share.” She replied, “That’s fine.” I thought that was a really bizarre and ungrateful response, so I said, “Well, hopefully you’ll enjoy it.” She didn’t respond to that comment at all.

Anyway, once we got home, I said to DH that I felt a bit deflated because his mum seemed so dismissive about the cake. He said, “You shouldn’t have taken it, as it’ll be taken the wrong way.”

I asked how on earth giving someone cake could be taken badly, and he said that because they’re all a bit on the larger side, it would come across as, “Fat people like cake - here’s my leftovers.” 😳

Surely not?! They’ve known me for 10 years, and we’ve often had cake together. How could that possibly be what they thought?

Gosh, I’m praying you all think I’m not being unreasonable and that there’s no way I’ve offended anyone by giving them the cake!

OP posts:
SpidersAreShitheads · 18/07/2026 17:56

Bjorkdidit · 14/07/2026 10:09

Another post where I genuinely cannot tell if this is sarcasm or typical MN hyperbole.

Edited

I was coming here to say the same 😂😂😂

I’m autistic so quite often get a bit confused about whether it’s humour or not so on this occasion I’m glad it’s not just me 😂😂

On a separate note OP, I would absolutely destroy that whole cake single-handedly within a couple of days myself, given the chance 😂😂🫣

MyBigBoots · 15/07/2026 20:33

I think it was a lovely thing to do. After birthdays, we often divide up cake and share it out with family. If you know your family’s likes and dislikes and dietary preferences, I can’t understand anyone taking offence or seeing it as leftovers and binning it.

AutumnHazel · 14/07/2026 10:43

ThisWildHedgehog · 14/07/2026 10:37

I’ve been rumbled 🍰

Hell hath no fury than a MNer being given cake 🎂 😡

ThisWildHedgehog · 14/07/2026 10:37

AutumnHazel · 14/07/2026 10:00

Yes, the OP is clearly stealth boasting here! “Ooo look how delicate and virtuous I am. I couldn’t possibly eat this! So I thought I’d bring it to you fatties as I know you can’t resist cake!”… It’s sick…

I would be SEETHING if I were the in-laws. The OP is clearly a pathological narcissistic sociopath for doing this sick stunt, and she should be grateful her in-laws didn’t take the cake and ram it hard into her sanctimonious face, and force down her smug gob til she choked, like she richly deserved! 😡🤬👿😾

I’ve been rumbled 🍰

OP posts:
Bjorkdidit · 14/07/2026 10:09

AutumnHazel · 14/07/2026 10:00

Yes, the OP is clearly stealth boasting here! “Ooo look how delicate and virtuous I am. I couldn’t possibly eat this! So I thought I’d bring it to you fatties as I know you can’t resist cake!”… It’s sick…

I would be SEETHING if I were the in-laws. The OP is clearly a pathological narcissistic sociopath for doing this sick stunt, and she should be grateful her in-laws didn’t take the cake and ram it hard into her sanctimonious face, and force down her smug gob til she choked, like she richly deserved! 😡🤬👿😾

Another post where I genuinely cannot tell if this is sarcasm or typical MN hyperbole.

Bjorkdidit · 14/07/2026 10:06

parachutegirl · 14/07/2026 07:03

Those cakes aren’t big enough to give someone else half, what were you thinking 😂

Of course they are. This is not a small cake that you'd buy any day of the week, they're really quite large and while the 'serves 16' suggestion is optimistic, there's probably a good 8-12 generous slices, so if there's only two of you and you've had a slice, you're only going to want another slice or two, so there'd be a decent amount left, so sharing it with loved ones when you visit is a nice and resonable thing to do, or so I thought.

AutumnHazel · 14/07/2026 10:00

parachutegirl · 14/07/2026 07:03

Those cakes aren’t big enough to give someone else half, what were you thinking 😂

Yes, the OP is clearly stealth boasting here! “Ooo look how delicate and virtuous I am. I couldn’t possibly eat this! So I thought I’d bring it to you fatties as I know you can’t resist cake!”… It’s sick…

I would be SEETHING if I were the in-laws. The OP is clearly a pathological narcissistic sociopath for doing this sick stunt, and she should be grateful her in-laws didn’t take the cake and ram it hard into her sanctimonious face, and force down her smug gob til she choked, like she richly deserved! 😡🤬👿😾

Dariella · 14/07/2026 10:00

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 13/07/2026 11:58

My MiL would not eat shop bought cake.

We organised a small gathering for her 70th birthday. We told her we’d sort all the food & cake and not to worry. We ordered a big cake from M&S, white with silver & pink writing “Happy 70th birthday Xxx”. She still made her own cake.

Why did you order a cake from M&S for someone who doesn’t eat shop-bought cake?
That’s a bit bonkers, isn’t it?

parachutegirl · 14/07/2026 07:03

Those cakes aren’t big enough to give someone else half, what were you thinking 😂

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 13/07/2026 22:13

based on your husbands comment, I think your mil may have thought that you were suggesting that she should be giving you cake when you go round there. You are making her feel bad for not having provided cake.

you also seem to have been expecting her to be very thankful which is a bit unnecessary for leftovers.

PenelopeJoanSterling · 13/07/2026 22:07

ThisWildHedgehog · 13/07/2026 11:28

Ah, we drove separately so he didn’t know I was bringing it until I got there.

it was a kind gesture but people take or presume things differently

AutumnHazel · 13/07/2026 22:04

UrbanSoul · 13/07/2026 14:17

Is this a joke?

When will you people learn. EVERYTHING is an insult! Nothing is done with good intentions….ever, if it’s not pure malice, it’s some cheeky fucker wanting to take advantage and bleed you dry.

AutumnHazel · 13/07/2026 21:59

AMurderofMurderingCrows · 13/07/2026 18:55

Get over yourself??

Fucking hell, it was only a bit of cake 😂

Only happy people eat “cake”. I’ll have you know I’ve been miserable for 30 years, and I’m not about to start being happy now with your “cake”, thank you very much.

If you gave me your sloppy seconds of a “cake” it would hurtled in my bin faster than you could say Black Forest Gateau!

I stick to my raw dust and grit if it’s ok with you. Now if you don’t mind, my face won’t clench itself into a screwed contortion of pure bitterness in its own.

AutumnHazel · 13/07/2026 21:45

Naurrr · 13/07/2026 11:41

I wouldn't be offended but I don't eat other people's leftovers, so it would be binned.

Quite right! You never know what air the cake’s wafted through getting to you.

And didn’t they sterilise the container?

And to think you’d want their sloppy seconds. How insulting!

Or maybe you could just stop being a neurotic princess…

Nousernameideaaga · 13/07/2026 21:45

Wingwalk · 13/07/2026 13:43

Do you think these posters go to weddings and turn their noses up at slices of the wedding cake? 😂 "ugh not leftovers again"

This is the best post 🤣

OP - plenty of people on here would gladly take cake off your hands ☺️

no good deed goes unpunished

bitmiffed26 · 13/07/2026 21:38

This is insane!
I’ve called round to my neighbours with a huge chunk of birthday cake before - we were going on holiday the day after our daughters birthday and we didn’t want it to go to waste.
it’s cake, it’s being kind. As far as I’m aware, it was received in the manner it was given.
its not like it’s half a sausage, a potato waffle and two table spoons of beans from someone’s discarded plate.

my sister will often take a few slices of cake from mine to her in-laws if there’s enough left.
most people love a bit of cake.

ThisWildHedgehog · 13/07/2026 21:35

BeSunnyLemonSheep · 13/07/2026 20:07

Exactly! So why is OP expecting such a response 🤣

Just a little ‘thank you’ would have been nice 🥺🫣

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 13/07/2026 21:30

Threeboystwocatsandadog · 13/07/2026 15:28

My neighbour baked a Christmas cake as she had expected guests for Christmas which was cancelled (first year of Covid). She brought us half the cake as they wouldn’t finish it themselves and there are 5 of us. I was delighted. I can’t see how anyone would be funny about half a cake.

When I was a child our neighbour used to make a bread pudding to use up bread. Then she’d cut it in half and bring half round to us, still hot! God it was so good. I can taste it now 50 years later.

RoseOliviaAu · 13/07/2026 20:31

moltopianissimo · 13/07/2026 18:25

Who are all these people that immediately bin anything they haven't made or bought themselves? Sorry but unless you have food allergies I think that's incredibly weird, not to mention wasteful.

I don’t bin everything but if I don’t want something and it was brought without asking yes I would throw it away. What I’m meant to force feed myself cake I don’t want?

BeSunnyLemonSheep · 13/07/2026 20:07

AMurderofMurderingCrows · 13/07/2026 18:55

Get over yourself??

Fucking hell, it was only a bit of cake 😂

Exactly! So why is OP expecting such a response 🤣

moltopianissimo · 13/07/2026 19:34

BeSunnyLemonSheep · 13/07/2026 18:34

Yeah, I don’t care if you think it’s weird or wasteful 🤣

I don’t even recycle so I don’t care about waste, and I’m quite okay with you thinking it’s weird 🤣

🏅

Bananalanacake · 13/07/2026 19:21

Oh and I thought this was going to be about an erotic cake shaped like a penis.

Bjorkdidit · 13/07/2026 19:02

I've now been reminded of the instructions I got with some pegs from Ikea, that included a handy graphic showing several steps for how to use them to hang out washing.

Candleabra · 13/07/2026 18:56

Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 13/07/2026 15:24

Not the point of the thread at all (n.b., OP, you did nothing wrong - but sometimes people get upset for reasons which are opaque), but I do like the useful guide to serving the cake:

Serving
Place cake on a flat surface. Carefully run a knife around the cake to release the buttercream. Remove collar. Slice using a sharp, long-bladed knife in a vertical direction. Repeat across cake. Turn cake 90 degrees, slice again in a vertical direction to create wedge shaped portions.
Clean knife blade between slices.

Gosh, without M & S guidance, I’d have never have known to cut wedges.

Excellent. I love serving suggestions too (probably one for another thread). Particularly frozen peas where the serving suggestion is…. A big bowl of peas 😂
But, back to the cake (non) issue - OP YANBU

AMurderofMurderingCrows · 13/07/2026 18:55

BeSunnyLemonSheep · 13/07/2026 13:32

“Bizarre and ungrateful”? It was half of a leftover cake you didn’t want anymore.

Get over yourself. I would be binning it.

Get over yourself??

Fucking hell, it was only a bit of cake 😂