AIBU to feel upset by comments about being a one-child family?

Anyone who makes silly comments like this about my DD is swiftly reminded that her little sister died before being born. It soon shuts them up.

We are lucky that DD loves being an only.

That’s a really horrible thing to say - they definitely don’t know what they’re talking about - of course you are a proper family.

My two closest friends are only children and both have a close relationship with their parents and lots of friends. On the other hand I barely speak to my sister. They have a much stronger sense of family as adults than I do, even though I have a sibling.

Ignore other people and their shit opinions - no one knows about the inner workings of your family life other than the three members of your (absolute proper) family.

We're in a similar situation, actively chose not to have another as DS is autistic, and whats to say that another child wouldn't have a completely opposing set of needs - I couldn't do that to him.

Im one of 4. We are all incredibly different. Big age gaps, so none of us really "grew up" with each other, have never been close. Just because you come from the same parents, doesn't mean that you're going to have a good relationship.

Families are what we make them. Whether that includes 1 kid or 12 kids or two mums or a single dad or kinship carers... Don't let others comments impact the happiness of your family

Families come in shapes and sizes, ignore such rude comments but just a word of caution, if you only have one child, be careful about over inviting others to your house to compensate especially on weekends, my dd had a friend whose mother kept asking my dd around on Saturdays to basically keep her only child company, generous family, inviting her out to expensive places like theme parks (not birthday) etc but it wasn’t fair on my other dd, and caused a lot of upset because at least 50% of the time I had to say no, my family dynamic worked with 2 kids, whilst I allowed them to do different things, not every weekend! Luckily my dd switched schools to a different lea (middle school system) and friendship fizzled. So basically if you are inviting kids around at weekends rotate who they are (unless they are an only and the parents are happy

Who on earth in 2026 made that sort of comment? What an outdated point of view and so incredibly weird. Was it you mum or MIL by any chance? I'm in my late sixties and I only ever had one child. That was back in the late 70's and nobody ever said that sort of thing to me even then. Occasionally people would ask if I was planning another but that's just par for the course. Don't let such a ridiculous comment make you feel bad. The vast majority of kids given the choice would far prefer to be only children. They don't want to share their toys or parents' love and time with another one. I mean honestly who would! I know so many people with siblings who fought like cat and dog as children and who aren't especially close as adults. I was able to give my son one on one attention in a way that I couldn't have with two and he definitely benefitted from it and isn't remotely bothered about not having a sibling. I think women so often have another child just because it's the "done thing" but quite frankly in this day and age it's becoming less and less the norm.

The parent with more than 2 children gets comments about too many children.

The parent with just girls gets a comment about whether they are going to try for a boy (or if their DH feels left out).

The parent with just boys gets asked about whether they feel they are missing out not having a girl.

The parent will small age gaps between two children gets told they must be mad.

The parent with large age gaps between two children gets told they might as well have just had one child.

The parent with an older girl and a younger boy gets told "it's the wrong way round".

I could go on. You get the idea. All parents get these comments. They are thoughtless and mindless. Ignore.

Siblings can make life miserable, as much as they can add to it. It’s all about genuine connection. If you can foster that with other children and people in your son’s life, you’re doing better than alot of parents with 2+ kids

@Greengingham
I understand how other people’s comments can affect our feelings, but the first stage to preventing this is to acknowledge it, as you have.

There’s no need for you to hear any opinions on what type of family is best, because that’s the whole point. You should try and build a fortress around your own feelings regarding this issue so that they will stand ground when you hear differently.

I think you should just ignore whoever said that and crack on with your life with your lovely (and totally proper) family 😊

Ignore stupid comments like this. I have a DS also, and I don’t feel like he misses out. He has great friends at school, he never asks about a sibling.
i have a DB and we’re not close at all, never have been even since kids. In the nicest way, it’s not as though he enriched my life.
some people are just idiots for saying what they think. Nothing wrong with a one child family.