Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DD’s friends have absolutely destroyed my carpet.

444 replies

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 11/07/2026 22:59

I don’t even know the point in posting this but DH is on a business trip and all my friends are probably watching the England match so have got no one to rant to.

my DD (12) had her friends over today and they went to B&M or wherever it was (honestly couldn’t care less at this point) and bought some of those stupid stress toys. They’re the ones filled with fluorescent, possibly radioactive, liquid and you squeeze them. when they came back they were instantly playing tug of war with them, jumping on them and just stretching them beyond their limits. I said, in no unclear terms, “if one of those pops and goes all over my carpet I’m going to hit the roof”. Obviously I got the whole “we’ll be careful!” reassurance, and please don’t ask me why I didn’t confiscate the toys off them because I honestly don’t know!

i was downstairs catching up on Eastenders and one of the girls comes down looking guilty and sheepish and disappears into the kitchen. She comes out clutching my Zoflora and I instantly ask her “what do you think you’re doing with that”, she claims the girls were “just making potions”. My response was “not with my Zoflora you’re not now what’s the real reason.” Cue her bursting into tears shouting “we didn’t mean to!”. My stomach dropped.

I’ve marched upstairs and there it is - a, what can only be described as marinated, ocean blue stain clearly smeared into my cream carpet. Not only that, there was also some scrunched up bits of toilet paper in it which had a faint blue tinge to it meaning they had obviously rubbed it in in an attempt to get it out.

i have to give myself credit for I didn’t scream or shout at the girls: I said “girls, you have half an hour to ring your parents and get them to collect you.” There were no arguments and rightly so.

it is now 11pm and I’m yet to receive an apology text from one of the parents - not that a “sorry” WhatsApp message will pay for my carpet to be professionally cleaned.

don’t know what the point is in posting this but just deflated to be honest. Unless of course anyone has any advice on how I can get this stain out or indeed on how to passive aggressively message the parents to imply that I do indeed want to be indemnified for a professional clean.

OP posts:
LivelyGreyShark · 13/07/2026 02:08

How is it snitching - your attitude is scary OP, if it was my 12 year old you made cry for accidentally spilling something on the carpet i wouldn't be happy.

category12 · 12/07/2026 23:41

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 21:29

Sorry it was just getting a bit overwhelming reading all the messages back so I snapped, but you are all right this is partly my responsibility. Anyways I got a quote for a professional clean… and it turns out the cleaner is the parent of one of the girls. I lied and said I’d spilled some Blue Curaçao on the carpet because it’s not really worth snitching, what’s done is done

You're so weird, OP. 😂

Why lie about the type of stain? You just don't need to say how it happened. 🤣

Hotdoughnut · 12/07/2026 22:38

Don't lie about the stain ffs! The chemicals to remove it need to be tailored to the stain...

Fiendishandfiery · 12/07/2026 21:49

I’m struggling to understand your position op.

from what I can read, it’s in your house, you were in charge, you knew they had the toys, you knew they were rough playing, you left them to it, an accident occurred and you wish the parents not there to apologise to you?

Clearingaspace · 12/07/2026 21:45

Oh no, this is when it becomes ok to say what happened - you say oh the girls were being silly with a squishy and got slime on the carpet and the parent hopefully gives a discount.

youvemadeyourpoint · 12/07/2026 21:43

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 21:29

Sorry it was just getting a bit overwhelming reading all the messages back so I snapped, but you are all right this is partly my responsibility. Anyways I got a quote for a professional clean… and it turns out the cleaner is the parent of one of the girls. I lied and said I’d spilled some Blue Curaçao on the carpet because it’s not really worth snitching, what’s done is done

Why did you lie? The girl probably told her mum all about the situation. Mine would have and we would have agreed you’re bonkers for going OTT.

I hope your DD manages to forgive you for humiliating her. It’s tricky enough for kids to navigate friendships and fallouts without mothers causing them problems.

sanityisamyth · 12/07/2026 21:39

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 21:29

Sorry it was just getting a bit overwhelming reading all the messages back so I snapped, but you are all right this is partly my responsibility. Anyways I got a quote for a professional clean… and it turns out the cleaner is the parent of one of the girls. I lied and said I’d spilled some Blue Curaçao on the carpet because it’s not really worth snitching, what’s done is done

Lying about the stain is ridiculous. A) it’ll be obvious it’s not blue curaçao, and B) it will need a very different technique to the slime so may do the carpet even more damage.

Growlybear83 · 12/07/2026 21:36

@MyOwnBestFriend1989 I don’t think it was necessary to tell the parent that the stain is blue curacao - their daughter will have told them about their experience when you chucked them out. I doubt there is a single child in your daughter’s year group who doesn’t know that you gave all your daughter’s friends 30 minutes to get out of your house for causing damage that you could so easily have prevented 😆😆

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 21:29

Sorry it was just getting a bit overwhelming reading all the messages back so I snapped, but you are all right this is partly my responsibility. Anyways I got a quote for a professional clean… and it turns out the cleaner is the parent of one of the girls. I lied and said I’d spilled some Blue Curaçao on the carpet because it’s not really worth snitching, what’s done is done

OP posts:
allthingsinmoderation · 12/07/2026 21:23

Thats annoying and i understand why you are upset, but honestly, you consented to them playing with these awful things indoors knowing the risks.
i think you were harsh sending the girls home and i think this will stay with your DD for a long time.
I had a similar carpet debacle with my DD (a bit older than yours) with fake tan on a cream carpet.
There are some great carpet cleaning options around.
Having said that if my DD had been sent home in these circumstances i would have messaged to apologise and offerred to share the cost of carpet cleaning.

hcee19 · 12/07/2026 21:12

Hotdoughnut · 12/07/2026 17:52

Gosh I think your reaction is very extreme. I would have arranged a professional cleaner (most stains come out), expressed annoyance, but otherwise the friends would have stayed and enjoyed themselves. Life is too short, it's a carpet, and I imagine your daughter is rather embarrassed by your reaction of chucking her friends out, which will live with her longer than a carpet would last!
The idea that the other parents should pay is completely ridiculous. If you tell them what happened, they'll think you're unhinged.

Edited

Well said 👏

Cherrytree86 · 12/07/2026 21:10

SuddenLightbulb · 12/07/2026 20:55

That’s pretty funny, given that you responded to a stained carpet by congratulating yourself on ‘not screaming or shouting’, sending all your daughter’s friends home, and planning to ask their parents to pay you!

@SuddenLightbulb

errr she was right to send them all home! What would you have done?! Smiled and baked them all a cake?!

Cherrytree86 · 12/07/2026 21:09

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 12/07/2026 17:32

Nobody on MN is ever bothered by anything. Pretty sure that if the DD and her mates had been playing with matches and burnt her house down then the OP would still be told to get over it and just buy another one.

Reminds me of the thread recently where a lady unknowingly put her baby I'm a defective restaurant high chair, which then fell over with the child in it and hit the ground. So many people were lining up to chastise the obviously shaken and upset OP because they wouldn't have batted an eyelid in the same situation. Apparently.

It’s lots of mumsnetters have loads of money so they can afford to simply shrug and just buy more. Meanwhile in the real world…

Clearingaspace · 12/07/2026 21:06

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 20:47

Oh my goodness, had a break from MN today and I’ve come back to all these messages having a go! Chill out!

I think you also needed to chill out with your daughters friend to be fair!

Silvers11 · 12/07/2026 20:55

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 20:47

Oh my goodness, had a break from MN today and I’ve come back to all these messages having a go! Chill out!

@MyOwnBestFriend1989 You asked whether you were being unreasonable to have sent the kids home or not. So people are giving you their views. Some agreeing with your actions, but most are saying you were over-harsh. Not sure where I stand on it to be honest.

SuddenLightbulb · 12/07/2026 20:55

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 20:47

Oh my goodness, had a break from MN today and I’ve come back to all these messages having a go! Chill out!

That’s pretty funny, given that you responded to a stained carpet by congratulating yourself on ‘not screaming or shouting’, sending all your daughter’s friends home, and planning to ask their parents to pay you!

Nousernameideaaga · 12/07/2026 20:51

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 20:47

Oh my goodness, had a break from MN today and I’ve come back to all these messages having a go! Chill out!

Er, sorry …. You brought it up …

MyOwnBestFriend1989 · 12/07/2026 20:47

Oh my goodness, had a break from MN today and I’ve come back to all these messages having a go! Chill out!

OP posts:
Bloozie · 12/07/2026 19:21

Malinia · 12/07/2026 11:45

This is entirely your fault, it was an accident and I wouldn't even have sent them home. They tried to clean it up.

If I were the other parents I would be thinking you completely overreacted.

Agree with this. It wasn’t the kids’ fault, they tried to make it better. OP made a daft decision leaving them to it. She knew it would happen and just let it happen.

Funkylights · 12/07/2026 19:04

You let them do it

raquarita · 12/07/2026 18:00

NeverDropYourMooncup · 12/07/2026 15:20

They're only 37 school weeks out of primary school. Some might not even be 12 yet.

It is absolutely normal daft behaviour for 12 year olds, especially in unsupervised groups.

"37 school weeks out of primary school" ...give me strength.

CossyBunt · 12/07/2026 17:59

Why didn’t you say No to them playing with it on your cream carpet? If I was one of their parents, I would be thinking that.

Do you struggle to assert yourself?

roses2 · 12/07/2026 17:54

Please don't despair, it might be salvageable. A few weeks ago I washed some cream shorts with blood on at a high temperature thinking the high temperature would get the stain out. It made it worse!

I then took biological washing powder, made a paste, smeared it over the stain and the stain lifted after a few hours. Please try biological stain removers before throwing it out.

Hotdoughnut · 12/07/2026 17:52

Gosh I think your reaction is very extreme. I would have arranged a professional cleaner (most stains come out), expressed annoyance, but otherwise the friends would have stayed and enjoyed themselves. Life is too short, it's a carpet, and I imagine your daughter is rather embarrassed by your reaction of chucking her friends out, which will live with her longer than a carpet would last!
The idea that the other parents should pay is completely ridiculous. If you tell them what happened, they'll think you're unhinged.

TheRealMagic · 12/07/2026 17:51

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 12/07/2026 17:32

Nobody on MN is ever bothered by anything. Pretty sure that if the DD and her mates had been playing with matches and burnt her house down then the OP would still be told to get over it and just buy another one.

Reminds me of the thread recently where a lady unknowingly put her baby I'm a defective restaurant high chair, which then fell over with the child in it and hit the ground. So many people were lining up to chastise the obviously shaken and upset OP because they wouldn't have batted an eyelid in the same situation. Apparently.

There are lots of things that would bother me, and my baby getting hurt certainly would have. I wouldn't, however, cause a big scene over a stain on a carpet. If I was very fussed about my carpets, I wouldn't let kids keep playing on them in a way that I'd already identified as likely to lead to damage.