AIBU for refusing to go on a couples' holiday because my partner didn't want my son to come?

A milestone birthday! I think the only milestone birthday that warrants a two week holiday is a 100. Which , obviously, wouldn’t happen.😁

She sounds very immature for someone appparently celebrating a milestone. I don’t think she is the right sort of person to be bringing into your sons life.

I don’t blame her for wanting to normal adult relationship where she can have her partner’s undivided attention for two weeks.

however you can leave your kid for two weeks so you aren’t compatible and the relationship won’t work

So basically what I originally said then!

Well the couple in the OP aren't going to work. But the original poster never did state how much couple time they actually get minus his kid. If he can't sort that then he will just need to stay single until the childs a bit more independent as it's unfair on any woman to be er have time alone with her partner without his kid always being there

As for the girlfriend, well she's not got kids so can get together with a single bloke

What’s your suggestion for both of them then?

Your DS will suffer if you continue this relationship

Lol that's quite amusing to read it on here as many are so anti moving a man into your home with kids.

They e all grown up fine

Dump her.

You sound like a great Dad.
She sounds very very immature.
Find someone who has the emotional maturity and capacity for a relationship with you and your son.
She is not that person.

She's unreasonable. Sounds like you're a great dad and your son is lucky to have you.

@Thechaseison71 It's not something I'd want for my kids but of course absolutely your call.

To be honest the 2 week holiday to a tropical island just because it's a specific birthday would have me heading for the exit, never mind the demand that you dump your kid for a fortnight and the pathetic insults because you won't .

I would be worried how she would treat your son if you ever had kids with her.

She sounds like a selfish brat and not cut out for the relationship.

“Bubbles90 · Today 23:56
Red flag. She is not a keeper. Your son is your number 1 priority. He comes first for you. No decent person would expect a parent to leave their child for 2 weeks to go on holiday. She's trying to make you chose between them. To be honest if I was in your shoes I would end the relationship. She will only get worse in her behaviour towards your son.”

This with bells on. And this:

“Worldcuproadshow · Today 00:04
Dump her, your son will be badly treated and sidelined by this woman especially if you have kids with her. Your son comes first, she knew that he existed when you got together. She can't erase him, if she wants childfree time then she needs to date a single man without kids, not a parent.”

You and your son come as a package. She is wrong for you and, honestly, i think she clearly isn’t very bright if she thinks she can date a parent and then complain about their child being around. It would be different if she had suggested 1 or 2 nights away but no right-thinking adult should expect their partner to ditch their child for 2 weeks in order to take the adult away. She sounds selfish, immature and just not very nice.

End the relationship. She isn't the one for you

Your GF is unreasonable. Your little boy is lucky to have a lovely Dad who has his best interests at heart.

Stick to your guns.

For a couple of years He was in the army before that Although not quite sure why that has to do with this as neither of us had kids with other people at the time

End the relationship

@Thechaseison71 And your dad of your daughters? Did he live with you?

Dump her, your son will be badly treated and sidelined by this woman especially if you have kids with her. Your son comes first, she knew that he existed when you got together. She can't erase him, if she wants childfree time then she needs to date a single man without kids, not a parent.

No never . We were together for 10 years. He lived 50/50 with us since a baby Now he's an adult and lives with his girlfriend

read the post - 1 year.

@Thechaseison71 Where does your son live then? Were you not married or living together with the father at any point?

No even my son's dad didn't move in with me and my daughters. My kids my problem

I'm not a hypocrite. I wouldn't be prepared to put up with some blokes kids so I wouldn't expect him to put up with mine

Red flag. She is not a keeper. Your son is your number 1 priority. He comes first for you. No decent person would expect a parent to leave their child for 2 weeks to go on holiday. She's trying to make you chose between them. To be honest if I was in your shoes I would end the relationship. She will only get worse in her behaviour towards your son.

@Thechaseison71 Oh I see. So you don't want a man moving in and supporting yours. That's fair enough. My husband and I obviously live together but I don't expect him to financially provide for my sons in the main.