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Original poster

What's something that men think is impressive, but really isn't?

288 replies

worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 18:22

Beep beep, come on traffic

Speaking of traffic, mine is when men (or boys, rather) rev their bloody engines on their cars that sound like they're about to explode. No, please, don't speed off, open the boot to your clapped out Corsa, I want to get in.

Also since going back to the gym, forgot how awful the men are there for showing off. There's this one in particular at my gym and idk if he's just mentally deranged or what but anytime he does any exercise he roars like a buffoon and I feel my vagina drying up a little more each time. It is so unnecessary. He will be easing his way through bicep curls, pretty much screaming and grunting for each one. Also has a horrifically embarassing habit of punching his chest, twice, every so often.

Give me your opinions and stories; what is something that men do that they think is impressive, but really, really isn't...

make my Saturday evening ✨

OP posts:
borborygmus1 · 11/07/2026 19:08

Watches and six packs.
Give me a man with a cheap Casio and a dadbod any day of the week!

MagpiePi · 11/07/2026 19:08

When they’re doing the OTT grunting and roaring in the gym I always make a little comment to myself along the lines of ‘Keep pushing, I can see the head! Take a breath and really bear down with the next contraction…’
Like they’d ever cope with childbirth 🙄

Isseywith2witchycats · 11/07/2026 19:08

A few years ago now but men on dating sites showing off their fishes they have caught, sorry guys but most girls don't want to sit on a muddy river bank all day while boring you does nothing but sit there being silent cos you don't want the fishes to go away definitely swipe left for me , what did attract me to my now partner was likes motorbikes, live music gigs and is actually intelligent and until retirement actually employed in a paid job

MargaretThursday · 11/07/2026 19:07

Burping. Or is that just my bil? Something a new born baby can do, but he wants everyone to admire how he's done it.

Speaking of traffic, mine is when men (or boys, rather) rev their bloody engines on their cars that sound like they're about to explode.
I asked my (then 18yo) ds what the appeal of doing that was, and he said "there is no appeal - from outside the car..." which made me smile.

Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 19:07

truepenguin · 11/07/2026 18:44

Calling each other 'bro'. Loudly. In public.

A new starter at work called me bro on friday and half of me felt disgusted that he would even have the nerve but the other half of me felt secretly buzzing that I had been accepted by a young person, enough to be called bro. I'm just too hip. I'm down with the kids.

OP posts:
PurpleLamb · 11/07/2026 19:06

Their mothers.

Going off Mumsnet anyway.

Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 19:05

ZanyPoet · 11/07/2026 18:44

it's not impressive TO YOU, but they obviously show off among themselves and impress each other.

Other women, and men, couldn't give a shit about their antics 😂

It's not related to male or female, anyone showing off with noise or attention seeking behaviour is boring.

Find the thread about the performance parents, usually the mums. No one gives a shit either, but they think they are impressive!

I'll have a look, sounds like my kinda thread. All the performative nonsense people do irks me so much, im so glad im not the only one who finds other parents doing it annoying af

OP posts:
Greengagesnfennel · 11/07/2026 19:04

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 11/07/2026 18:26

Walking around with their shirts off, accompanied by a lil’ swagger.

Yes, please show me your sad nipples while I’m in Lidl trying to buy cheese…

Oh you set me off thelightisdeofthemoon. That is funny!

ZanyPoet · 11/07/2026 19:04

Evaka · 11/07/2026 18:33

Their running stats. Fuck strava. Their cycling gear, particularly lycra padded arses, stupid shoes and reflective sunnies. Their boring leg muscles.

WHY do we keep pushing the idea that sport is a "man" thing? or that boys do sport, and girls.. play with their dolls or do craft?

Strava is not a MAN thing FFS.

Sport is a not a male area, can we stop pushing us out of everything?
Peak mumsnet, men obsessed with the gym/ cycling/ running and women obsessed with dusting and laundry.

SkirlingGirl · 11/07/2026 19:03

My most satisfying moment was when a group of lycra clad men wandered into a cafe we were in. They were so impressed with themselves that they were almost braying as they sat there in their padded lycra and cleated cycling shoes. The gobbiest one of them all tried to walk upstairs in his cleats . He slipped and slid all the way back down on his scrawny (but fortunately for him, padded) bum. We fell about laughing.

They've always got legs that look like an albino pepperami in a string vest.

Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 19:03

Yellowundermarine · 11/07/2026 18:39

Watches. Cars. Oh, and when they expect me to be full of gratitude about being "complimented" on having big boobs...I ask if I should pass it on to my mother and grandmothers as it was their genetics...

Hahaha god that's both tragic and hilarious. I have mosquito bites so can't relate but now I'm kinda glad

OP posts:
OneHangryHiker · 11/07/2026 19:02

Playing a bit of guitar and singing, usually badly.

Their taste in films which they must press on you, “oh my god, you haven’t seen the godfather! It’s amazing, here, let’s watch it!” They think you lived under a rock and didn’t know of the film’s existence and don’t like it when you say of course you did, it’s just not your thing so you’ve never wanted to see it.

The Barbie movie had me howling for things like that, they got it bang on with the Kens.dh was less impressed as it was all the shit he did.

CheezyBeans · 11/07/2026 19:00

RaininSummer · 11/07/2026 18:35

Ones that refer to their baby mamas. Sad fuckers. More boys than actual men usually.

Yerggh!

That and their souped up cars which are all noise and no action.

Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 19:00

PermanentTemporary · 11/07/2026 18:37

I’ve been impressed by few cocks tbh.

Cars, in general. Car designers and engineers are impressive. Buying one and driving it are not in themselves impressive activities.

Men’s watches. I never notice them. They seem to cost a lot. But I presume those who buy them like them.

Not fair, I want an impressive cock. Maybe one of my own one day

Yeah I like cars just not the twats who drive them like they're in Fast and Furious and end up killing someone

I like watches! The issue is I'm too poor to tell the difference between expensive and cheap ones but if it looks good, it looks good!

OP posts:
Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 18:57

ExBert80 · 11/07/2026 18:36

I do find MAMIL’s funny when I see them in a little group, going into cafes with their Lycra suits unzipped far down and waddling because of the shoes. Why do they cosplay the Tour de For e when they are out for a bike ride?

MAMIL Hahaha just googled it and I love that

Ah man they really do cos cosplay tour de France don't they 😭 chill out Mike you're only biking to Co-op

OP posts:
Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 18:55

igelkott2026 · 11/07/2026 18:35

Agree about the clapped out cars with noisy exhausts.

And taking their shirts off all the time.

And the noisy swimming (my ds is a decent swimmer but is noisy and splashy!)

Revving their shit cars, whilst topless, on the way to the gym to be a public nuisance. The trifactor of twatty men

OP posts:
FKAT · 11/07/2026 18:53

John Peel. Apparently a genius.

Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 18:53

TwoBad · 11/07/2026 18:51

Oh gosh, we have awful grunty man in our gym as well. He sounds like he's dislocated something wherever he lifts, uuuunurghh of pain wail, then performative drop of weights, then occasionally a roar of achievement. Even my best noise cancelling headphones cannot compete with his sounds.

Solidarity!! Omg the dropping of weights as well. Seriously no need. If it's so heavy that you have to drop it then you probably shouldn't be lifting it - except it isn't even heavy, you're just a twat 😐😐😐

OP posts:
OrangeSlices998 · 11/07/2026 18:52

Getting a woman pregnant, like there part in it is in any way impressive!

Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 18:51

phoenixrosehere · 11/07/2026 18:49

Their knowledge/ obsession with sports.

I don’t care and I definitely am not impressed that they can remember sports stats but can’t remember to do things that actually effect the household.

Ugh this is in my top 3. Like what the fuck do you mean you can you tell me who won a football match on March 3rd, 1978 but can't remember when my birthday is. Bastards

OP posts:
TwoBad · 11/07/2026 18:51

Oh gosh, we have awful grunty man in our gym as well. He sounds like he's dislocated something wherever he lifts, uuuunurghh of pain wail, then performative drop of weights, then occasionally a roar of achievement. Even my best noise cancelling headphones cannot compete with his sounds.

PermanentTemporary · 11/07/2026 18:50

i like a MAMIL too…I like peeling it off [lets side down]

Original poster
worldshottestmom · 11/07/2026 18:49

RaininSummer · 11/07/2026 18:35

Ones that refer to their baby mamas. Sad fuckers. More boys than actual men usually.

Whoever says 'baby mama', 'baby daddy' should not have children I'm sorry. Unless it's said in jest.

OP posts:
phoenixrosehere · 11/07/2026 18:49

Their knowledge/ obsession with sports.

I don’t care and I definitely am not impressed that they can remember sports stats but can’t remember to do things that actually effect the household.

BirdLandedonmyHead · 11/07/2026 18:48

Looking after their own children. Its a massive performance for some of them.