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AIBU?

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A man asked me why I crossed the road

88 replies

berriesinthesummer · 11/07/2026 11:51

I was on a walk minding my own business. A man was walking towards me and taking up most of the pavement, so I crossed over to the other side - I would usually cross this road at some point anyway as part of my usual route.

The man then called across the road to ask why I had crossed and ‘am I that scary?’ I just looked around puzzled and said ‘no?’

AIBU to feel a bit unnerved about this? I didn’t cross because he was a man, I would have done if it was anyone taking up most of the pavement as there were parked cars everywhere so it’s a bit awkward to cross people. As I had to cross at some point, I may as well have done it at that point. I find walking close to people generally very irritating whoever they are.

OP posts:
ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 13:05

nomas · 11/07/2026 12:58

People wanting to make a joke don’t cross the road to confront a woman though.

Edited

When did he cross the road to confront her?

I honestly feel like I'm reading a completely different thread.

Sherararara · 11/07/2026 13:04

nomas · 11/07/2026 12:58

People wanting to make a joke don’t cross the road to confront a woman though.

Edited

He didn’t

SeaAndSangria · 11/07/2026 13:03

Suspicioustoenails · 11/07/2026 11:56

I thought this was going to have something to do with a chicken...

Same - I'd have put a puzzled face on and said " to get to the other side?!"
😁

ginasevern · 11/07/2026 13:00

@ArseSkinForAFriend "Sounds like a joke that didn't land."

Bet you £50 quid he wouldn't have said it to a bloke. Or said anything to a bloke in the same circumstances for that matter.

PinkPonyCIub · 11/07/2026 13:00

Ignore them and don't validate them

nomas · 11/07/2026 12:58

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:03

Sounds like a joke that didn't land.

I wouldn't pay it any more thought.

People wanting to make a joke don’t cross the road to confront a woman though.

RoseOliviaAu · 11/07/2026 12:57

‘Yes, ugly too!’ 😀

Mycatmax · 11/07/2026 12:57

BillieWiper · 11/07/2026 12:50

Clearly he was a bit scary if he chooses to shout at strangers questioning their movements and use of public space?!

Quite. But the male aggression apologists must try to convince themselves otherwise. Bless them!

SunnyRedSnail · 11/07/2026 12:54

@berriesinthesummer the fact he assumed it was anything to do with him and then shouted is the sign of a guilty conscience or someone who has a screw loose!!

Although I would have shouted back "the same reason as the chicken "

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:53

AWeeCupOfTeaAndAnIndividualFruitTrifle · 11/07/2026 12:50

I agree. Calling "Good morning!" to your neighbour across the street is entirely normal and shouting TO them; demanding to know why a stranger crossed the road near you is shouting AT them.

And now we have 'demanding' when the OP said he asked?

Honestly, it's like a creative writing class on this thread 😳

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:51

Mycatmax · 11/07/2026 12:42

Absolute hair splitting. I couldn’t call at someone across the road without raising my voice. Aka “shouting”

No, shouting at the OP in this context would be aggressive.

Calling across to her wouldn't be.

I think this is quite obvious in context.

thestudio · 11/07/2026 12:51

"Well, you are now."

AWeeCupOfTeaAndAnIndividualFruitTrifle · 11/07/2026 12:50

Mycatmax · 11/07/2026 12:42

Absolute hair splitting. I couldn’t call at someone across the road without raising my voice. Aka “shouting”

I agree. Calling "Good morning!" to your neighbour across the street is entirely normal and shouting TO them; demanding to know why a stranger crossed the road near you is shouting AT them.

BillieWiper · 11/07/2026 12:50

Clearly he was a bit scary if he chooses to shout at strangers questioning their movements and use of public space?!

AWeeCupOfTeaAndAnIndividualFruitTrifle · 11/07/2026 12:48

It does sound a bit 'methinks he doth protest too much'. Maybe he was intending to interact with you in some way - whether to look you up and down at close quarters, 'accidentally' brush past you or even just enjoy the thought of making you have to step into the road to get past him. I agree with PP on 'main character syndrome'.

Somebody else happening to be using the same pavement as you and then crossing the road at some point isn't anything that most normal people would give a moment's thought to; much less ask you to justify. Why would you remotely care?

BMW58 · 11/07/2026 12:45

I'd have told him I moved because he was hogging the pavement. But I'm gobby and have zero fucks left to give.

Mycatmax · 11/07/2026 12:42

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:39

Can you quote it then please?

Because all I can see is "The man then called across the road"

It doesn't say he shouted at the OP.

If she'd got shouted at for crossing the road it would be quite different.

I call across the road to my neighbour on the way to work so say 'Good morning'.

I don't shout at him.

Absolute hair splitting. I couldn’t call at someone across the road without raising my voice. Aka “shouting”

Kokonimater · 11/07/2026 12:40

It’s a bit silly of him but you don’t need to be ‘unnerved’ about it.

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:39

Mycatmax · 11/07/2026 12:36

It’s in the OP!! The bloke she crossed the street to avoid then shouted across the street at her.

Can you quote it then please?

Because all I can see is "The man then called across the road"

It doesn't say he shouted at the OP.

If she'd got shouted at for crossing the road it would be quite different.

I call across the road to my neighbour on the way to work so say 'Good morning'.

I don't shout at him.

Owly11 · 11/07/2026 12:38

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:03

Sounds like a joke that didn't land.

I wouldn't pay it any more thought.

Unless it was said in an aggressive manner this is the most likely scenario.

AuntieNorma · 11/07/2026 12:36

Maybe his anxiety got triggered by someone rejecting a pavement sharing moment with him. Maybe he’s socially awkward.
maybe he thought he was being reassuring.
maybe he’s a twat.

maybe vast amounts of people are twats.

Mycatmax · 11/07/2026 12:36

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:25

Who got shouted at?

It’s in the OP!! The bloke she crossed the street to avoid then shouted across the street at her.

ArseSkinForAFriend · 11/07/2026 12:35

Imisscoffee2021 · 11/07/2026 12:32

He showed he was that scary, feeling confident enough to get annoyed and speak at a woman crossing the road. Imagine feeling you can just do that , I'm not sure many women do!

Who got annoyed?

I mean it's possible he was annoyed, but just as possible it was a silly joke that didn't land.

Either way the OP hasn't stated he looked annoyed and she also didn't state (as per PP) that he shouted at her.

Imisscoffee2021 · 11/07/2026 12:32

He showed he was that scary, feeling confident enough to get annoyed and speak at a woman crossing the road. Imagine feeling you can just do that , I'm not sure many women do!

DilettanteRedRagger · 11/07/2026 12:30

I love reading about male entitlement before I’ve had my morning coffee (I know it’s 12:30; I don’t want to talk about it).

Point being, ignore it.

This is what they want: you to waste your brainpower thinking about their stupid shite so you can’t use that time for ANYTHING more worthwhile, which includes pretty much anything on Earth except more of male felony-stupid bollocks.