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AIBU?

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Would you offer a lift in this situation?

116 replies

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:32

If a friend who lives close to you is having a birthday party close by, and your other friends are coming too, but they live a 45 minute drive away, would you offer to go and pick them up and give them a lift to the party?

OP posts:
Mycatmax · 11/07/2026 11:10

No I would be walking

Loulou4022 · 11/07/2026 11:08

Nope!! Definitely not a 1.5 hour round trip!! However if they’re driving I’d expect them to offer you a lift if they are passing near to you!!

notatinydancer · 11/07/2026 11:05

I might pick them up but I wouldn’t take them home.

Shewas · 11/07/2026 11:03

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:54

They are close friends and it’s my husband who they have asked and my husband has agreed to it. I said why have you said yes?! And he got angry at me saying it’s his decision and why do I care? Just wondering if I’m in the wrong for thinking he should’ve said no

That's a different question entirely. If he wants to do it, it's perfectly reasonable that he should.

Shewas · 11/07/2026 11:02

I'd offer that if they drove to mine they could stay overnight, but I wouldn't do a 90 min round trip to pick them up.

Favouritefruits · 11/07/2026 10:59

No way but I might offer them a bed for the night do they could have a drink

rainbowstardrops · 11/07/2026 10:58

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:54

They are close friends and it’s my husband who they have asked and my husband has agreed to it. I said why have you said yes?! And he got angry at me saying it’s his decision and why do I care? Just wondering if I’m in the wrong for thinking he should’ve said no

What an idiot! Presumably he’ll have to take them back home again later?!
Why did they ask? Is it because they want to drink? And now your DH can’t!

OrdinaryGirl · 11/07/2026 10:57

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:54

They are close friends and it’s my husband who they have asked and my husband has agreed to it. I said why have you said yes?! And he got angry at me saying it’s his decision and why do I care? Just wondering if I’m in the wrong for thinking he should’ve said no

Ahh, then this is a different question. The question here is ‘Am I being unreasonable to be angry at my husband for offering to go and collect our friends to bring them to a party down the road from us?’

Notthebenicecrew · 11/07/2026 10:56

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:54

They are close friends and it’s my husband who they have asked and my husband has agreed to it. I said why have you said yes?! And he got angry at me saying it’s his decision and why do I care? Just wondering if I’m in the wrong for thinking he should’ve said no

Hmmm interesting !
He is going to drive 45 minutes each way to collect your friend
If it looks like a duck ...

CassandraWebb · 11/07/2026 10:56

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:54

They are close friends and it’s my husband who they have asked and my husband has agreed to it. I said why have you said yes?! And he got angry at me saying it’s his decision and why do I care? Just wondering if I’m in the wrong for thinking he should’ve said no

Why do you care? If he's happy to then I see no issue.

CassandraWebb · 11/07/2026 10:55

Probably not..

With caveats.

There with times in my life when I would have been so grateful for a friend to go out of their way to give me a lift

  • when my disability is flaring and I can't drive and am not well enough to risk public transport but would still love to be at my friend's party
  • even more so when I was in an abusive relationship and he would out put every obstacle in the way to stop me socialising

But assuming no factors along those lines.... Then no!

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:54

rainbowstardrops · 11/07/2026 10:51

Are these people friends or are they actually family? Have they asked you to go and pick them up? Either way, I’d be saying no!

They are close friends and it’s my husband who they have asked and my husband has agreed to it. I said why have you said yes?! And he got angry at me saying it’s his decision and why do I care? Just wondering if I’m in the wrong for thinking he should’ve said no

OP posts:
JustAnotherWhinger · 11/07/2026 10:52

Not in normal circumstances no.

I have done a similar journey for a friend who was just a few weeks after leaving her abusive partner and was nervous about public transport in case she bumped into him.

Nousernameideaaga · 11/07/2026 10:51

Definitely not

They should swing by yours and get you on the way, if anything

Shedmistress · 11/07/2026 10:51

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:32

If a friend who lives close to you is having a birthday party close by, and your other friends are coming too, but they live a 45 minute drive away, would you offer to go and pick them up and give them a lift to the party?

Are you a registered taxi company?

rainbowstardrops · 11/07/2026 10:51

Are these people friends or are they actually family? Have they asked you to go and pick them up? Either way, I’d be saying no!

Friendlygingercat · 11/07/2026 10:51

Not if it means you can have a drink. There are these things called taxis.

CastleCrasher · 11/07/2026 10:50

Definitely not. If I was the far away friend I'd probably offer to pick up the friend that lives closer on my way, but definitely not the other way around. Why do they think you should? (Willing to bet this is family, but friends)

Notthebenicecrew · 11/07/2026 10:49

No

Happyjoe · 11/07/2026 10:48

No, too far. Unless really really good friends and you all go above and beyond to help each other as a norm.

PuppyMonkey · 11/07/2026 10:48

Ha. Is that all we’re getting OP? Grin

OttersOnAPlane · 11/07/2026 10:47

Heck no! What would it have to do with you?

GSolis · 11/07/2026 10:46

Thank you everyone 👍🏻

OP posts:
GoodbyeZebedee · 11/07/2026 10:45

Definitely not.

HereForFootie · 11/07/2026 10:44

No, I'd be hoping they'd offer to pick me up in their way!