Does anyone ever have no money at all?

I have been there. I still don’t have as much money as I would like, but I have a few hundred in savings and I do have some money in businesses for real emergencies, although that money technically isn’t mine.

I think for me the worst is when I’m on a good path and I’m suddenly hit with large expenses - I had a time were I was collecting parking fines like gold coins, absolutly ridiculous - and I missed some letters, and that escalated. I’m sure I was scammed by my electric company as they added £1k to my bill one year, I worked hard to contest it but couldn’t and that also escalated and became debt. Im still dealing with that and other debts that accumulated.

It’s so hard. I’m still on the broke side, I have moments where I’m on the last £100 the week before payday and I’m wondering how I can create more of a cushion.

I am taking some extra jobs like market research and consulting which helps, but I feel like all my money gets eaten up sometimes. Plus with 2 kids and everything including bills and food just going up.

Im with you OP. I agree with others in terms of it takes a lot of discipline - for me it’s the unexpected curveballs that bring me back to square one.

So this debt accrued when you moved? Like moving fees, stamp duty etc? Surely this is a shared debt with your partner. Do all of your expenses add up to what he is paying or more? Does he earn more than you? Is he helping to pay kids expenses like clothes, day trips, school lunches etc?

If he is controlling with money or leaving you broke so your debt is increasing (and it sounds like the relationship is dead) you might be better off alone. You can claim UC then.

Before I inherited money in my mid 20s I was broke, no one lent me money though. I had a low paying job. Then I got a credit card and loans (I didn’t earn much) despite having an inheritance. The more I had the more I wanted. I spent money like water and on designer items. I got about £12K back in ppi. That was the catalyst though to rein in spending and manage my money (including inheritance).

You really have to want to get yourself out of debt. Maybe get a second job? Retrain more if you can.

Yes, plenty of people live with no money at the end (or middle, or all) of the month. I’ve done so many times in my life. You’re not alone and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.

There are things you can do to help yourself though. Even if it’s all stacked against you, you’re not powerless.

I feel you, there is always something else to pay out for.

what survey sites do you use? The Jam Doughnut app is also good for cashback if you can remember to use it or Sprive but Sprive cash back is paid into your mortgage.

Yes all the time.

OP if you can give a breakdown of income and outgoings, people may be able to provide some help.

Given your complex personal situation with your partner; are they actually paying half the costs of the children?

It’s depressing that an average wage is so difficult to raise a family on

My colleague who works part time with me has a part time job counselling for victim support, is a single mother (divorced) and opened up a plastic wallet yesterday containing £50 and £20 notes. She obviously is very good at budgeting. But she rents a housing association house and her car is leased.

I would be wary of giving up and letting credit cards blow up as advised upthread. I spent most of my adult life skint after growing up in poverty. I dragged myself out of it aged 32 but my credit rating, sad as it is, was very instrumental in getting me out. It wasnt perfect, and i learnt what it needed and what to do to get it good and make it work for me. Its not so much about being able to borrow vast sums, i dont like debt, but getting a mortgage for example.

You say you are terrible with money - that is where you start!

Write down all your spend. Every single amount and see what you can cut down.

You need Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover.

I got out of debt and started saving for the first time in my life. It's possible but you need a plan.

You’re on £35k but don’t have to pay the mortgage?

I think there are plenty of people with no money but yours sounds like bad management (which you do admit).

I did run out of money when younger, but so did nearly everyone else so it was normal and seen as temporary.

I know 2 people through a hobby who run out of money and it looks desperate, one can't afford to fix her car so has to take expensive taxis to get to work - it's a doom cycle shell never get out of. The other is on a low income but seems unable to budget, fortunately her parents top her up at the end of the month.

You sound like an intelligent person, are you to overwhelmed to tackle this? Single incomes are hard but with h paying the mortgage you likely have wiggle room and could get right with some effort.

How old are the kids? Does their father ever have them? How many hours a week do you work?

Do you not keep records of what you are spending? No monthly budget?

Crazily so did my DH!

You say you’re terrible with money - what makes you say that?

"Keep on doing what you are doing and you'll carry on getting what you always got"

You NEED advice OP. You surely don't want to carry on like this?

My DH was just like you when we met. He changed totally.

So you know what to do? You’re just not doing it.
Not much can be done to help you then until you help yourself