Does anyone ever have no money at all?

Different circumstances, and I'm pretty good with money but by Friday I had 69p left in my current account until Monday.
I have a credit card with a limit of £1750, with only £50 left on it, and I needed food for me and my cats to get us through the weekend, so had to eat into that.
It's a horrible way to live, but I'm unable to work due to my health, and so my only income is disability benefits. With the col increases and an elderly very poorly cat I'm struggling.
I'm sympathetic to everyone in financial difficulty, whatever their personal circumstances, It's hard and can be relentless.

Find a man who will spend more on you and buy own brand tomatoe pure.

Not without it destroying your credit record for six years so you may as well not pay it at all because the damage will be done by them freezing the interest. It’s registered as a default.

You’re basically saying that you are happy to be permanently skint for the rest of your life. That sucks. How is that going to feel when your kids are grown up and having to bail you out? What lessons are you teaching them? What happens if they can’t get the things in life they need to succeed because mom’s maxed out on debt?

The analogy with a fat person doesn’t work. If you’re unhappily fat you’re only affecting yourself. We all probably had irresponsible moments in our lives but now you’ve got kids. Grow up and deal with your behaviour towards money.

So you know what to do, are you following your own advice?

If not, you're not the only one. My sister is a physio and has hip problems that affect her running. She knows exactly what to do to prevent the issues, but does she do it? No, she doesn't. Does she get frustrated with the issue? Yes. Does this change anything? No.

I now switch off when she talks about it because she has all the tools available to her, but she can't be bothered to put her energy where her knowledge and expertise is and follow her own advice.

Out of interest, why aren't you applying your skill and knowledge to your own circumstances?

Also that she could be struggling on for years, if not decades until she starts doing something constructive instead of digging herself further into a hole where the consequences of getting out gets worse and worse.

I still think the possible unfairness of the finances with the (ex?)partner is part of the issue - could well be that food, bills and likely child related expenses outweigh the mortgage payment, possibly on a lower income too.

Whilst I’m not in your position now, I was in a lot of debt in my 20s - the spending it part was fun -paying it back was awful. I was young and wanted to travel but I couldn’t and that was my motivation for paying it off. I would check out moneysavingexpert for some advice with your debts. If you can’t afford your current repayment, you will be able to negotiate something with them that you can afford. It will probably affect your credit score but it’s better than getting further into debt. You will need to change your spending habits. That’s the tough bit. I’m good with money now but terrible with my diet - it’s kind of the same thing like you mentioned, so I don’t know why I’m good with one and not the other.
Someone mentioned having a lightbulb moment and that’s so true. You need a reason to work towards. Think of all the things you want for the future but you can’t have because of your finances - I don’t necessarily mean material items, but you may want to work less, or go on a holiday, or be able to socialise or do x for your daughter.

I was like this when I first became a single parent, by the time I'd paid all the bills & rent I had £50 a week to feed & clothe me & ds, we only shopped at Farmfoods as they had offers & I could buy a lot for not much money, one week a month we lived out of the freezer. I was lucky that my parents bought ds shoes & if my mum saw any clothes she thought ds would like in the supermarket she would buy him them. I dreaded bills arriving & often had to choose which ones I paid, built up debt I had no idea when I could pay.

16 years later I'm so much better with money, admittedly I have more money coming in, but I actually have savings now & everything is paid on time. It was a difficult time but I got through it.

Yes. About 5 years ago my bank account was often at 0, while the smart meter was on £-4.80 (gas and electric get cut off at £-5.00). It’s very stressful. Low income, money would run out halfway through the month and I’d be waiting desperately for the child benefit to be paid in order to survive the last 2 weeks of the month. At the time, 1 child and £80 to last the remaining two weeks. My weekly shop was £30 per week (included everything in addition to food). I once made ‘French onion soup’ out of some beef stock cubes and some old onions because that was all that was left in the cupboards. Baby clothes/toys/anything from eBay or charity shops only. Couldn’t get the bus because the £2.30 return fare was too much, so I had to walk the 40 minutes to town for shopping/free baby groups, etc., and then 40 minutes back. I could go on…it was absolute survival. I never wasted a penny.

I have never got into any debt or used credit cards though. I knew I’d never be able to pay it back to I just avoided using them. Selling anything possible on Fb marketplace was my go to as well!

YANBU I know how you feel my DH works full time and gets 30,000 and some change a year I don’t work due to my health we don’t own a house we privately rent we don’t own a car I get the bus and walk everywhere and my husband uses a push bike, we don’t have any kids just pets and we normally are ok every month. But this month has been really hard because my husband was off work sick and he only got sick pay which wasn’t even enough to pay our rent I had to sell jewellery and borrow money off my aunty and get a crisis payment from the council just to get through the month and make sure our rent was paid. It’s been really really fucking hard this month we are living hand to mouth.

Lots of personal and social circumstances make it harder to manage money, or access credit, and lots of working people are in debt as a matter of routine.

And some people find it harder to organise their lives. Poor mental health doesn't help. Also, most of the ADHD adults I've met have at least a history of debt.

Get in touch with Step Change

It was a few years ago so things might have changed. Hopefully not.

Promise me you won't ever become a counsellor....

I didn't realize credit card companies can freeze the interest - that's great. Thanks for sharing:)

I thought the same. Low six figures?! That's a brilliant income!!

35k would be life changing for me. I earn £15k with no extra top ups.

You are not a moderate income family, you are in the top 5% of UK households by income.

Mumsnet is so strangely delusional sometimes.

I met up with friends last weekend and sat at the table whilst they ate and spent just £1.87 on a coke. Tbf I ate before I went out but I still felt a bit embarrassed.

Because it’s painful to read and watch someone doing this when they could be doing something else

I take home £1250 per month. I pay rent, council tax, some credit cards, dog insurance and bus fair. I also had a family birthday this month which took £50, so I now have £7 per day to live on and feed 3 of us until pay day. This is my life almost every month.

1. I saw on one of your replies you said the you and the children’s father aren’t together anymore - you need to see citizens advice as you could plan to move out. My friend just separated and whilst they were still living together she was able to claim UC which has massively topped up her income but they had to financially separate - he has bought her out of the mortgage since so she had cash then to put towards her own place.
2. you say you’ve done debt management plans before but keep going back into to the debt - do you have ADHD? Overspending and poor budgeting can be part of impulsively and dopamine seeking if you are. Or have you just not been in a position where you have to sort it out (eg him paying the mortgage).
3. look at the charity store change re your debt - and / or look at financelle for advice on getting debt free and building up savings or an American version is Dave Ramsey. good luck 🍀
4. can work give you more hours on weekends etc to top up your salary?

True but also I think theres a form of denial
That " being skint" is what everyone goes through and its just one of those things , hence the thread and not wanting advice

35K no mortgage should be fine but its the debts that are the issue
Escalating debt spiral.means they then have no money for basic essentials
On every skint thread, its always debt or only working very PT

In my twenties I lived from pay check to pay check. Mercifully, my finances improved as I got older.

Paying down credit cards and medical bills has made me and DH skint. Children are grown and living on their own nearby. We have no treats that cost money. Sometimes, really scrounging to pay for petrol. Eating lots of pasta, potatoes, and beans. I have a lot of spices so that helps. I have to turn down outings with friends and it’s embarrassing. Our closest friends live across the street and enjoy socializing at free events, playing board games, watching movies at home and eating popcorn. They have much, much more money, but are very down to earth, not flashy people. They spend their money on travel and art classes. But they do not judge us.

OP, the situation you describe is stressful and exhausting. People who haven’t been through it don’t seem to understand that it’s not just about the money itself, it’s also about the energy spent analyzing every choice, figuring out doable alternatives, fending off guilt and resentment. The sadness and frustration are very real. As much as possible, try to give yourself some grace. Don’t give up. You have more company in this than you know. You are not alone.