My partner and I have different expectations around sleep

Sounds like you've got a good routine, I wish I was enthused enough to get up early and gym or whatever before work, it always makes the day better. Staying up until 2 or 3 watching TV does not sound appealing to be honest. And berating you for your (healthy) choices after just 7 months probably suggests you're not compatible.

It's not about your sleep patterns. It's about how he's treating you. This will only get worse, you've not known him for long, end it.

@tiredoldthing bin him off my love.

You're only dating and he is being so rude about your lifestyle. You are not compatible. This will only get worse if you let this get more serious. You do not need to stay up to please him or be seen as not "boring"

My husband and I have very different sleep schedules. He doesnt sleep much, I need 9/10 hours a night!

The difference is, he is totally cool with me sleeping when I want to sleep. I get a hug, a kiss and sent off to bed 😂. This is because he loves and cares for me and wants me to feel rested.

Your boyfriend is already showing you who he is. Please listen.

LOL at the posters saying OP should change her routine and reduce her gym sessions so she can stay up late, watching TV with her “boyfriend”. They can bugger off as well 🤣

Clearly it doesn't if you are regularly close to crying with exhaustion.

He is trying to control and bully you into submission so you accept he your ruler, he is trying to mold you into his puppet. He can’t tolerate anyone having different views, opinions or routines that do not align with him. He isn’t willing to compromise nor does he care that shaming you into staying up later will make you feel tired and run down. He will use it as an excuse to stop you going to the gym. In a few years time you won’t dare voice an opinion on anything in case it displeases him or worse!

No I haven’t read all the posts. If he’s an arse and their lifestyles are not compatible, she should dump him. It’s not that deep

Agree- she should dump. He's behaving like a dick and clearly very boring himself if he thinks watching TV is the height of a fascinating life

So why go to the gym for so long every day? It's clearly too much for your system.

Urgh! How can you find this specimen attractive, when he’s shown clearly that he isn’t interested in your wants or needs? All he wants is for you to accommodate him/his routine to your detriment, with no compromise from his side. The crappy cherry on the top of this shit-show of a “relationship” is when he verbally abuses and berates you when you don’t do what he wants, when he wants and look like you enjoy it. This isn’t the compromise of adjusting to new relationship and starting to build a life together - this is him being a bullying, abusive bell- end.

OP, you don’t need to justify your routine for us. What you DO need to do is dump this arsehole. In future, when a boyfriend calls you names, makes you feel less than or tries to manipulate you - immediate dumping, please.

If he's calling you boring after only a few months, I'd be showing him the door. This is supposed the be the lovey dovey honeymoon stage! Neither of you are wrong for your sleep patterns, but him treating you like this IS wrong.

I don't think it matters about the sleep times he has called you boring and pathetic. He sounds horrible. I would get rid and get back to doing what you want.!

No I haven’t read all the posts. If he’s an arse and their lifestyles are not compatible, she should dump him. It’s not that deep

Not compatible

Ltb.

Tell him he's boring not getting up when you do, and make sure you do wake him up and see what he says. If you respect his sleep pattern he should respect yours.

My partner and I also have very different sleep patterns. He goes to bed at one or two and gets up at ten or later. Once he suggested to me that I arrange with my work that I start at 11 so I could stay in step with him. Not possible, of course! He had a similar attitude to the OP - his way is the only way. Now, at weekends, I match his pattern, but I don't during the week.

Find someone else. He’s rude and thoughtless.

I just have to say that getting up at 5.40 to go to the gym really isn’t outside the norm and it isn’t extreme and it’s an amazing habit and don’t let anyone make you think otherwise. I would be deeply reflecting not so much on the sleep thing but more generally on the way you are being treated by your partner and whether this is going to work for you long term. My partner is always completely supportive of whatever time I choose to go to bed or any other decision i make.

And boring as well. Jim Royle vibes.

He’d love me. I am in bed by 9 and up at 5. That’s how I roll because it’s always been the case. I’ll stay up later when needed.
I am sorry but this man is an arsehole. Dump.

He sounds nasty and controlling.

He is wrong to insult you & force you to stay up, when you get up early. I generally get up between 6 and 7am. 5:40 am feels early to me.

I tend to start winding down to go to bed between 8:30 and 9pm, and get to bed by 10pm, otherwise I'm a wreck. You need to start as you mean to go on, and insist that you need to get to bed at 10pm.

YANBU.

He IS being an arse about it though - did you read the OP's posts?

And watching TV isnt a particularly "exciting" activity 😆

OP is actually living her life and engaging in fitness which is far less "boring" than sat on the sofa every night watching tv

I feel like you both have unusually extreme patterns, yours unusually early, his unusually late. They don’t work together very well. You will both likely have to compromise.

my husband and I are not compatible sleepers but in every other way are an ideal partnership. We work around it. I go to bed earlier sometimes and he’ll sleep in the spare room to avoid waking me up - and that’s cool. Sometimes I’ll go to bed a little later with him and accept that I’ll be a bit tired at work and need that extra coffee. But most importantly, we have so much in common and so much mutual respect that we actively want the othe to be happy and well rested. So we give and take and also accept that we won’t always sleep together. Only you know if there is enough here to keep going.

one thing my partner has NEVER said is that he wants me to stay later with him. He knows I need my sleep and is supportive of me doing whatever I need to to keep happy and healthy. Your partner doesn’t sound at first blush like he has your best interests at heart. Sleep is vital for most people but especially for some like you and me. You need a partner who supports that.

You don't think he's wrong for pushing her into following his sleep pattern and telling her she's pathetic for wanting to sleep earlier?