AIBU to think this is a bit much to ask for school run?

’To be honest, that’s too much for me to commit to with a two year old. I don’t mind the odd reciprocal school run drop off, but not doing it more than half the week. Have you tried school breakfast club/childminder etc ’

I got into this bullshit with a school mum and I ended up feeling apologetic when I couldn’t take her (ungrateful child who didn’t want to carry his own bag and who got out all the toys I’d just tidied up when she dropped him at mine at 8am when I had a newborn and a toddler) son when mine was off school ill! I put a stop to it then and wished I’d never started as once you’ve agreed, you’re ’letting people down’ by backing out. Better to not agree in the first place.

There must be something reciprocal, their ds must get home somehow? Just have some kind of rota. So they take yours on her days off or something.

leave their daughter with us before work so that I can take her to school with my son

How early are they thinking?

I’d say “fuck that” regardless. Time for the Mumsnet classic line: “that doesn’t work for me”.

So he can do them, as others manage with multiple children. Again, they are making their problem, your problem.
So you’d be doing all pick ups and 3 drop offs?

I would say no for two reasons: if your son is off sick, you’ll still feel obligated to take her child to school, and what happens when the others start school? This arrangement may be expected to go on for years.

It will feel awkward for a few weeks but they’ll get over it. They should have thought about their own childcare responsibilities before now.

I would say no.
I did have to say no many years ago to someone in the reception era who was looking to make her working day easier by using me.
I said I couldn't commit for the next 6 years. I couldn't have handled the extra chaos in the morning

Does she mean dropping the child off at 8.30 & you leave for school at 8.30
Or drop the child off at 7.30 and you look after them for an hour (or whatever) before you leave for school

Two very different scenarios

But id refuse on yhe grounds that im not a childminder & dont have or want to get the necessary insurance or registration, my mornings with young children are busy enough as it is and I dont need the money.

Because for that sort of arrangement you should be paid, and if there is no mo ey on the table they are CFs

Then what about school holidays.... Will she be asking you to have her child all day?

So what if she doesnt like the answer & lives next door, just get on with your life without the inconvenience of being her unpaid, on tap babysitter.

She they could take your dd to school the other two days?

I couldn’t commit to this. I’ve only got one but I quite like our little mornings but often they are quite rushed, and I wouldn’t want another kid in the mix and neither would my son. If they offered something in return it might be something but sounds like you’d be repair their child 3 times a week.
Ooo I hate it when someone else makes their problem, your problem!

So hang on. She wants you to do her childcare as she expects her husband to drive her to work then drive home again???

Yep thats cheeky. She could get the bus etc and husband can do drop off.

long term these things rarely continue if there is not an element of reciprocity. Swapping favours is fab but I'd be wary of someone asking so much and not even trying to offer anything in return.

How long before you leave would they be dropping off? 3 days is quite a lot. But I think I’d do it and say yes shall we split the week… Would it be nice if you didn’t have to do it 2 days a week?

Who picks up their child currently?, can your DS not be picked up at the same time?

Definitely this

So, the Dad could do all the school runs and she could just drive herself to work?

But instead she wants you to do morning childcare and drop offs so she can be a passenger princess?

I'd say no, mornings are already hectic enough. It also sounds alike they've been pretty presumptuous and made job commitments under the assumption that you'd provide them with free childcare.

Do not do it!!! Unless you're getting an equal favour in return it's just not worth the hassle.

What if your kid is sick and can't go to school? What if you're running late, will they get shitty with you for making their child late? What if their child throws a wobbly and makes you all late? As the children get more comfortable with you they're more likely to act up too. What if your child falls out with their child and doesn't want them coming in the morning? What if you take on a job that means you can no longer do the school run? What if you're ill or have a bereavement or some other reason you don't want other people's children around. Will you be expevetd to give them breakfast 3 days a week too? I just wouldn't.

If the husband doesn’t work then couldn’t they all go in the car to drop the mum off and then return or wait until school time? He would need to take the other two with them anyway??

No, I would just say I don't want to make a regular commitment and hope she can sort something else out.

How much are they paying you for your child minding and drop off duties?

I would say that I’d be happy to do the mornings on those days as long as they could do the pick ups. They can’t expect so much from you whilst not being happy to reciprocate.

It sounds like they are taking the piss if there's a stay at home parent!

They could drop mum a little earlier and then he takes his own dc to school.

YANBU. Can't they use a breakfast club?