Tips for getting through the night home alone

I often spend nights alone at my parents when they’re away. While it’s still light I go round and make sure all the windows are shut (just a quick visual) and lock the doors. Make sure the curtains/ blinds are all shut. We always leave the porch light on anyway and as someone else said I sometimes leave the hall light on too. I always have an audiobook on to sleep anyway but you could always leave the tv on low if that would help. Then I Use my usual sleep aids of lavender oil, rescue remedy, and magnesium foot butter.

I have a lock on my bedroom door too, and I bring the kids in with me and lock my bedroom. I sleep with earplugs so I feel uncomfortable with kids in other rooms with no adult able to hear if they were in danger.

Having my dog sleep upstairs in my room was when I could actually relax and sleep at night when dh was away. She's no longer with us, but I still sleep semi ok.
Not that that will help you @Flower836385 unless you have a dog, but the keeping the lights on downstairs sounds a good idea

A - barking dogs are a burglar deterrent.
B - I like knowing he's on the bed protecting me.

Get an alarm? It helps with the anxiety that someone is in the house. A basic Ring package is around £300-400, you really sleep better

Just wanted to send a supportive message ❤️ I totally relate and find it hard to sleep in the house alone. Lots of useful tips here - for future look at the Ring alarm system, which has sensors you can stick onto doors / windows. I don’t have one (I have a dog instead!), but my mum does and it’s very reassuring when the system says “home and armed” once you’ve typed in the code! Good luck tonight, I’m sending sleepy vibes xxx

I feel for you OP. I am also afraid of the dark following trauma. I sleep with a side light on in the bedroom when my DH is away. I can echo PP who say that a burglar alarm with sensors on any accessible windows and doors is invaluable for peace of mind. I also leave a light on in another bedroom or two so one is visible from front and back. My mum always says that a burglar will never take the risk that it’s someone who works nights, or up with a child - it just gives enough uncertainty they’ll go elsewhere.

Hope you get some rest op.
I’d suggest being mindful what you watch/read before bed especially unfamiliar tv programmes or news items that might feature something that could trigger you.
familiar books or light comedy might work.

I have ptsd etc but I’m alone a lot and used to live alone for years with DC. Things that stop my brain panicking so I’ve planned for everything

a planned way out of the house
window slightly ajar so you can get help
soft lighting
leave a light on downstairs so a looks like someone’s down there still b can see if there’s an emergency
if you have kids feeling bad share with them
radio on or audio books
relaxing hot drink
if you have pets share with them, if you don’t have pets they are my lifeline

you will be ok 💐

Valerian tea definitely knocks you out.

I read in bed until I drop off, having gone up as late as I can, leave a light on on the stairs.

Meditation and valerian tea help me.

And propranolol for anxiety, but that's not so helpful for tonight (plus when I started taking it, it stopped me sleeping.)

It won’t help for tonight, but I second a pp who suggested a dog. Mine’s v soppy but there’s no way anyone is getting into the house at night without him causing a massive ruckus.

I love a check list so I would make a list of all the windows and doors you lock/curtains or blinds you close and tick them off as you do them.
At least then if you have a bit of a wobble later on you can physically see they're done and hopefully your anxiety will subside a bit.
Also as others have said by 4am ish it's getting light and lots of people are getting up for early shifts. Leave a light on and could you listen to an audio book maybe? 💐

I know it sounds stupid but don’t forget that fear is not a reliable indicator of danger - just because you’re scared doesn’t mean that something bad is going to happen. It’s completely understandable that you feel like this and you know why, it’s not a reflection of an actual threat (although it feels like that). As PP say, leave a light on and no burglar would bother risking a house where people might be up and about. Think about how secure you are, safe in your home with the doors locked, window open and phone to hand just in case you need any help. Enjoy the peace and quiet, you’ve got this. And if you don’t sleep much, don’t worry, just resting in bed is almost as good for a day or two.

Probably an extra expense but could you get a burglar alarm fitted? We have one which has sensors on all doors & windows on the ground floor. When I’m alone I switch on the perimeter as soon as everyone is home from school/work. This helps me relax and not worry about being alone/with kids. Is this an option for you?

Yes, offer a sleepover to your five year old. You could play some white noise or relaxing music in your room.

Yes to this and lights on downstairs and in hall. If feasible can your DC sleep in your room with you? Might make you feel a bit more at ease.

When I was younger and was living alone in a house I felt a bit unsure in I used to leave bbc world service on the radio on low all night 😂 maybe you could pop a podcast on low?

Do all your evening security checks and narrate it out loud to yourself so you know you’ve done it (lock doors / shut windows etc).

Sit in bed with a cup of decaf tea or a herbal tea and read your book, don’t pressure yourself to sleep. Eventually you’ll get sleepy.

Leave your lamps on :)

My mum is similar, due to not dissimilar event as a child. She massively struggles to be alone at home. And yes, has had therapy. We've done a series of soft overnight lights throughout the house. Mainly fairy lights and movement sensor lamps.