FFS! Relative upset after children could not ride my competition horses

Why have people become so entitled. She knew the situation, she should have respected it. It was your relative who ruined the afternoon, it sounds like you were very accommodating.

I really don’t understand why the mum thinks she and her kids know more than you. She should be reinforcing what you’re saying, not trying to change your mind, especially as you told her what to expect before they arrived. No way would I want random kids on my horses. When I had horses, I soon found out that one would not walk backwards using the correct commands and would rear up so if anyone asked for a ride while I was on her, I would use this technique to get her to rear up and say she was in a skittish mood and it wouldn’t be safe. Needless to say, the rearing up had 100% put them off anyway!

Depends on the horse though. Mines never been around children & gets spooked by giggling & shrieking etc.
I did let my neighbours kid sit on him once & he instantly starting tensing up & trying to do little rears (I had tight hold of him) the kid start squeeling which made it all worse.
I definitely wouldn't do it again!

He's a little 13.3hh new forest. My other horse is a 16hh quarter horse x TB & a fit competition horse & is okay around kids as she's used to them.

If the owner says no then no means no. Doesn't matter if other horses are okay with it

You put your responsibility to your horses first, the only thing you could do. You made it clear that it would be dangerous for the children to sit on them. I don’t see what else you could do.

You did everything right by warning them in advance that the horses could not be ridden by kids.

Your relative behaved like an idiot.

I would ignore them and carry on with your life.

They will have to take their kids to a riding school (and pay...) if they want them to do a pony ride.

I consulted a lawyer once about a similar situation. Answer: if you KNEW it was dangerous and you allowed the children to ride the horses, yes you would be held responsible if one was injured.

I’d want my parents to reply ; the others at the yard were horrified at you wanting to put your children in danger, these are not child friendly horses and I know op told you that. Also you wanted her to let your kids feed them a bag of apples that would make them painfully ill? Child neglect and cruelty to animals, I thought you were better than that. You owe op an apology, and your children too. I will be telling everyone about this if I hear another word.

They have old naggs for children. Horses are highly dangerous, a lively horse will try to run as soon as someone sits on them, they just want to go, a child stands very little chance of surviving if they can't hold the horse back. They will just go flat out gallop and it will try to jump or swerve round the first obstacle and the kid will be dead, put a child on a lively horse and try to hold the horse, it will just dance and run itself in a circle around you, the kid will be chucked off and trampled. Probably 1% of horses are suitable for kids.... old arthritic nags that can barely move.

They are so stupid - horses are amazing but often dangerous animals if it’s the wrong rider. There is a reason that Pony Club have specified horse types, insurance ect. If one of their children was injured on your horse - they would be shouting about it

You put safety of their child first and considered the wellbeing of your horses.

you 100% did the right thing

This!

People are so clueless when it comes to horses. Does she know that your horse is worth a 5 figure sum and she probably wouldn’t want to cough up the money if it got colic 🤬

And there’s someone who doesn’t own a horse ……

Plenty of people act EXACTLY like that . I’ve had colleagues angling to ride my horses despite me pointing out that the two I am a Redwings’s guardian for , I am expressly forbidden to ride because of various health issues , not to mention that one of them ( who we call Moo because she’s black and white and an absolute cow) is actually unbroken to ride . I have pointed out that my unicorn horse who was a retirement present to myself and cost a startling amount of money ( well it shocked me , having not bought a horse properly for 20 years ) is known to have a fit of the vapours and has decked me more than once without warning, just because the sun has gone in, or a leaf has fallen off a tree half a mile away . But no . Still they ask . It’s bloody tedious.

I know, Im being harsh. But could you not have just said , oh what a shame, its their bed time. Put horse back, shut stable door, tingly laugh. No joke, Edinburgh zoo did this with their giraffes. Sorry, its just too much angst over a situation you had control over. ....wait till menopause.

Virtually everyone with a horse or pony has experienced this. That along with random strangers thinking they are entitled to feed horses. That's why you keep seeing it. Not because it's made up but because there are a lot of entitled knobheads out there.

You just confirmed the pony was more of a liability, I know , had one myself. So why so much drama about your special horses

To be honest , you sound really precious. I've had competition horses and its no problem for a kid to sit on. Just say no next time and stop banging on about how super professional your horse are

Sorry i don't believe this. I've seen far too many stories with the exact same format on AITA and other groups. Nobody would act like that if they'd been previously told about things. Yes there are absolute nightmare people out there but not this many of them that all act the same way. I'm surprised you didn't put the final bit about how your mum agrees with them and isn't speaking to you but your dad is on your side 🙄

Funny, these moms so intent on getting their kids a (free) horse ride don't seem too interested in forking over the cash and buying their precious kid their OWN pony, do they? But more than happy to use yours for free. Ixnay to that. Go pay someone if you want your kid to ride, or buy your own.

I bet you're right about the instagram posts she'd been planning, lol. What an ass. I'd totally block her number everywhere.

I can empathize with your frustration and irritation. I have had horses for most of my life (as a child, pony club for my kids, shows, etc) and people are absolute idiots around horses. Your relative is also a total ass. I am sure if one of her kids was injured she'd be suing you as fast and hard as she could. I wouldn't even bother sending her a message--she's too dense and rude to even comprehend how awful her behaviour was.

I remember when I was about 11/12, I went on holiday and visited some of my dad's side of the family. They were distant relations who I'd never met before. They had horses stabled on their farm.

I had previously had a few riding lessons but was not what you'd called competent.

They said I could have a ride on their horse. They got it all saddled and got me a helmet. Only, they didn't have a mounting block.

So, I tried getting on without one. Went right over the other side and fell badly on my shoulder. Blacked out, too.

I've had shoulder problems for the rest of my life. I've repeatedly dislocated that shoulder, and now I have to be very wary of what I do.

I don't blame anyone for the accident. It happened on a very relaxed, and not particularly huge horse, to someone who had done some riding, and, thankfully, I had a helmet.

I don't blame you at all for not letting your cousins on your horses. Accidents happen far too easily. Whether it's horses, dogs, or other animals, it only takes a second for an accident to happen. It will always be a gamble, and when you know your animals well, you know just how big of a gamble it will be.

Just imagine how awful their mum would have been if one of the kids ended up with an arm bone sticking out or a cracked skull.

You did absolutely the right thing. Safety first.
Don't give it another thought xxx

Absolutely not unreasonable - I work in a hospital and have xrayed children/adults with multiple fractures after falling from horses, even horses they were used to.

Stupid ignorant cow with zero understanding of how animal welfare works. I would ask her if you can sit on her kids and ride around on them and take photos? Tell her she is being utterly unreasonable to not let you. And then insist that each child eats lots of apples and act surprised when it gives them the sh*ts.

I have horses so understand that entirely however, more than one apple would not cause any problems. That you were being daft about it