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AIBU?

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Original poster

I told my friend about my crush on Postman Pat and she suggested he was gay. AIBU or is she?

190 replies

Tben · 09/07/2026 13:59

I confessed to a friend that I had a bit of a crush on Postman Pat. He’s not the most conventionally attractive man, but he has a calming way about him, and is clearly a capable problem solver and provider. He’ll also have a good public sector pension, and security is a big plus for me.

I mentioned this to a friend and she said I had “no chance”. She said Pat was a middle-aged single man with a cat, and I should “read between the lines”.

AIBU or is my friend just jealous?

OP posts:
Bristolandlazy · 09/07/2026 14:56

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Hopefully not, this one is entertaining and better than half the fake threads on MN.

StrawberryWater · 09/07/2026 14:55

He's dedo not entirely straight. He has a wife and kid but if you watch the TV show he hates them lol. Never wants to spend time with Julian or whatever his name is.

IfNot · 09/07/2026 14:53

I was obsessed with collecting the 80s Pat books when my kids were little - they are GENIUS and very funny.
Pat’s “wife” was installed much later.
It’s a lavender marriage.
Also, Hell YES to Ted Glen.
Marry Ajay, shag Ted, go china shopping with Pat.

Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 09/07/2026 14:52

You need to get hold of the classic book "Postman Pet gets Fat"

That sounds like a Viz pisstake 😂

Bristolandlazy · 09/07/2026 14:51

Tben · 09/07/2026 14:04

I had no idea he had a wife! I knew my friend was just being malicious.

Sending support. I feel your pain, I think Daddy Pig would be the perfect husband and he's taken.

ACertainSenseOfLiberty · 09/07/2026 14:49

Here you go -

https://postmanpat.fandom.com/wiki/Postman_Pat_Gets_Fat

From-
https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/117214017724

Baconandonions · 09/07/2026 14:48

Tben · 09/07/2026 14:04

I had no idea he had a wife! I knew my friend was just being malicious.

😂😂😂

ACertainSenseOfLiberty · 09/07/2026 14:48

You need to get hold of the classic book "Postman Pet gets Fat" That'll put you right off him, the greedy pig. There's a particularly delightful illustration of his stomach straining his shirt buttons to explode that'll clench you up in all the wrong ways.

Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 09/07/2026 14:45

Has everyone gone mad?

I'm blaming the heat. Although a thread about Mr Tumble always ends with someone saying that Justin Fletcher is basically sex on legs so who knows?

Wherestheteenguide · 09/07/2026 14:39

Postman pat?! Did you not have he man on as a kid?! Now there's someone to crush over 🤣

geekygardener · 09/07/2026 14:36

The pat movie is arguably the best children’s movie ever. So funny. I have been saying this for years. He is married (Mrs Sara Clifton) with a son (Julian). Happily married if the movie is anything to go by. Doesn’t stop anyone fancying him. Lots of reasons for that as mentioned. Ben Taylor is an arrogant twat and if you fancy him, take a long look in the mirror.

clearlyy · 09/07/2026 14:25

Today I learned postman pat is a bisexual icon. 🤣

HelpMeGetThrough · 09/07/2026 14:24

I think we should also be keeping an eye on Mrs Goggins. Well you never know, runs the post office doesn’t she?

Myfridgeiscool · 09/07/2026 14:24

CalpolOnToast · 09/07/2026 14:08

He's knocking off the doctor, her kids look just like him

This is epic!

Inprep · 09/07/2026 14:24

This reply has been deleted

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Myoldbear · 09/07/2026 14:20

Look at Postman Pat and the Magpie Hen episode.
I think there's quite a lot of flirting between him and Dorothy Thompson when they are alone together for quite some time.

HelpMeGetThrough · 09/07/2026 14:16

GoneWithTHeWindJammers · 09/07/2026 14:06

I have seen him at prides, so he is at least bi.

He’s got a thing going with Bob the Builder.

DanaScullysLegoHair · 09/07/2026 14:15

Could Sara be Pat's sister?

RumAndCola · 09/07/2026 14:13

YABU but only because Ted Glen is the most fanciable bloke in Greendale. He’s good with his hands.

KamikazePigeon · 09/07/2026 14:12

For what it's worth, in one of my past jobs I encountered John Cunliffe, who created Postman Pat. I have no idea whether he's gay or not, but he's very pleasingly pedantic over correct spelling and punctuation, which delighted me for some reason.

FannyCradocksDoughnut · 09/07/2026 14:12

My first boyfriend was Captain Scarlet 😍

AprilMizzel · 09/07/2026 14:11

GoneWithTHeWindJammers · 09/07/2026 14:08

He has come out as bi since 1984

Show quote history

I haven't followed as avidly as others - so new information for me.

He's still married though - haven't missed a break up or a divorce as well have I?

enpeatea · 09/07/2026 14:10

Has everyone gone mad?

HookLineandStinker · 09/07/2026 14:09

Christ, I had no idea he was married. I'm going to have to go outside and touch some grass.

Or smoke it.

He likes cats. I still would. If Mrs Pat was no more, I'm not a complete cunt.

GoneWithTHeWindJammers · 09/07/2026 14:08

AprilMizzel · 09/07/2026 14:07

Wife in later books apparently - first mention in 1984 book.

He has come out as bi since 1984