15 year old keeps getting parcels and I'm starting to wonder where the money’s coming from

She’s fifteen. You can’t sell on online selling platforms unless you’re 18 or over, so OP would likely know because she would be the account holder.

Thanks all. I think some of you have gone a bit further than where my head was if I’m honest. I wasn’t immediately thinking drugs or anything like that, she’s never given us any reason to think that before.

She does have a bank account but it’s one we set up years ago and I haven’t looked at it in ages. I don’t know if I’m even able to without her there, I’ll have to check.

The parcels don’t all look the same. A couple have looked like they could be Vinted but not all of them. She has mentioned Vinted before but I didn’t think she actually used it much.

And no, she’s not constantly sending parcels out herself as far as I’ve noticed, although I’m not with her every minute of the day obviously.

I am going to have another conversation with her tonight when she’s home. I think I’ve probably been too worried about sounding accusing and that’s stopped me just asking properly. I don’t really want to go straight through her phone unless I absolutely have to, I’d rather give her the chance to explain first.

No definitely not loads of expensive stuff, from what I’ve seen anyway. It’s more little things than big purchases which is partly why I wasn’t sure if I was overthinking it.

I have asked but she just gets a bit fed up and says she’s using her own money. I don’t know whether to push it more or whether that’ll just make her clam up completely.

As for someone buying her things, that’s probably the bit that’s worrying me the most. I honestly don’t know and I don’t want to jump straight to the worst conclusion but I also don’t want to be naive if that makes sense.

She’s fifteen. You can’t sell on online selling platforms unless you’re 18 or over, so OP would likely know because she would be the account holder.

If she is buying stuff online, how does she pay, assuming she does not have a credit card? Does she have her own current account and debit card?

Why are you even asking?

Your 15 year old child has access to funds - and you don't know where they are coming from.

Of course you insist!

Everyone will tell you it’s either OF or SD or drugs. But I’d think it’s more likely to be proceeds from selling stuff on eBay, Vinted etc.

Either way of course you should ask.

Not at the moment they don’t.

And the ones they did were savings accounts which parents pay into. But the flex one and the FlexOne saver are from 11 upwards.

Ok, so you understand then that at 15 she can send things to an inpost locker? I wonder then why you responded to someone saying she would send it to an inpost locker by saying she must be 18 to open a PO Box…🤷🏽‍♀️

She gets £10 a week pocket money and has done for a while. We pay for things like clothes, school stuff and if she goes out somewhere planned we’re not expecting that to come out of her pocket money.

The parcels have been things like phone cases, make up, hair bits, that sort of thing from what I’ve actually seen. Nothing designer or really expensive, which is probably why I kept telling myself it wasn’t a big deal.

I don’t know what parental controls people are expecting a 15 year old to have if I’m honest. She’s not got free rein over everything but she’s not 10 either.

Some of these replies have made me realise I do need to stop dancing around it though. I’ve been saying things like “where did you get that then?” and accepting a vague answer because I didn’t want to turn it into an argument.

Tonight I’m just going to ask her outright to explain where the money’s coming from and if it’s selling things or Vinted then fine, I’d actually be relieved. If she refuses or gets defensive then obviously I’ll have to take it further. Hopefully it’s something completely boring and I’ve worked myself up over nothing.

I think you do need to check properly how she's paying.

Just say it, not casually or a vague "can you afford all this" but directly "I need to you to show me how you are funding these purchases please."

I read last week of a teen who ran up a huge Apple Pay bill because she didn't realise that ultimately it was actual money being spent - she genuinely thought it was "use Apple Pay" and that somehow because it always let her pay that way she was fine!

Traditional bank accounts probably, although Nationwide do accounts for under 11s, but I was thinking more of accounts like Monzo, Go Henry and the like which act the same - as in you can put money in them and use a debit card to spend. This is what mine have.

I think that’s fair actually. I suppose I’ve been looking at it more from the point of view of not wanting her to think I don’t trust her, but I can see why people are saying it’s my business as well.

Shopping addiction honestly hadn’t even crossed my mind. She is on TikTok a lot and seems to know about every new thing before I’ve even heard of it. I don’t know if she’s just getting influenced into buying lots of little cheap things because they don’t seem expensive individually.

Either way I think the answer is the same really, I need to have a proper conversation instead of making little comments and hoping she’ll tell me on her own. I’ll update later if I get anywhere. Hopefully it’s all a lot less dramatic than some of the suggestions on here.

They can't just sign up and sell stuff. They have to verify they are 18 to a) sign up and b) have a way to receive funds. Their parents have either set up the account for them, or they are using a parent's account. They won't just be grabbing random stuff and selling it (and if they are, more fool the parents for giving them free access).