AIBU to ask in-laws to remove shoes?

Assuming you're neither a parent nor friends ( for long) with new parents. You can wash your socks/ feet.

Anyone who can put shoes on can manage to remove them.

Most people treat infections and wash daily, You? And you cannot be serious rgds what you walk through on the street being less problematic

OP has the ability to speak for herself.

As you're uncomfortable with this, take a pair of indoor shoes with you. I generally do to people I dont know as that seems to solve all issues. Ive been to a couple of houses where people have those socks with grips for people to wear. I might do the same and put some clean ones by the front door.

The message to your guests is that your carpets are of more concern to you than their comfort. Graceless!

What so you're more worried about getting the soles of your feet dirty than dirtying somebody's floor where babies are crawling with your literal shoes that have been walking around outside all day?

You’ll get mixed answers on here. I’m a shoes off person and if you want my advice just tell them straight yourself.

I spent years trying to get my drippy dh to deal with his own parents. He’d ask them to take their shoes off then the next t time they’d just walk straight in.

i just avoid them now because they annoyed me so much (not just about shoes).

I wish I’d been more assertive. You don’t need to explain your reasons just greet them at the door and tell them to take their shoes off.

I think the sick baby (sorry you're going through it!) is completely unrelated and indeed they say the more bacteria and dirt they're exposed to, the better. But I'm with you, shoes off inside a house. I honestly don't know what people are thinking if they leave them in, it's gross.

So you have to be strict, and I wouldn't even mention it's in relation to the sick baby cos they'll scoff at that.

Fair enough, some ask for this and I duly respect and we do it when we get a new carpet/flooring. However colds etc are a virus, not caused by bacteria. Xx

They will only need it for the one refuser

In the normal run of things, I'd say you were BU to ask guests to take off their shoes, but this is NOT the normal run of things.

This is your baby, and it's his health at risk. That trumps an old man's hurty feels every bloody time, and you shouldn't have to apologise for putting your baby before everything else.

No, you can't keep all germs away nor should you try, but doing small things that help mitigate the risk while it's still so high is not unreasonable.

Indeed but if it’s an older person or not feasible to take off shoes you can still run to a quick mop if needed after they’ve gone

Agreed much easier to clean, and I have wooden floors myself. If someone walked through in shoes though and you’ve got a young child, you are going to want to clean up asap while simultaneously having enough on your plate without unexpected housework. It’s more effort to clean my floors than it is for a person to remove their shoes, so off they go!

Absolutely. My house had filthy carpets everywhere, including the downstairs hallway and living room, I ripped them out first thing and installed oak flooring. I have Ruggable rugs which you can wash in a normal washing machine.

"While the 85% statistic is often used in cleaning marketing to emphasize the importance of doormats, it actually refers to all outdoor contaminants and grime tracked indoors, rather than total household dust. In reality, about 70% of household dust is generated indoors, while the remaining 30% comes from the outside."

So weird that people constantly freak out about everyday germs, and then constantly freak out about how to boost their immune system. Hmmm.

Also, where I live, many people offer slippers that are manky and horrible and not even the right size. No thanks. I'll take off my shoes if you insist, and live in my own respectable socks.

If they’re in ok health I suppose it isn’t too much harm, my dm would fall without her shoes on. I always take shoes off but irrationally hate people asking so maybe be careful how you word it!!

I'll freely admit, I am a shoes-on person and have absolutely no problem with people keeping them on in my house. I will also say that my approach is very cultural, and I currently - as a shoes-on person - live in a strictly shoes-off culture, so there's a bit of a dissonance there. So: I respect that it is an issue that divides, and so I always ask, and always follow what the house-owner tells me, out of basic respect. Your house, your rules. My rules are different; no big deal. My main aim is to respect the people I am visiting.

Yeah, I do tell myself I'm less judgy and more relaxed and that literally no one has ever died from shoes in the house. But you do you.

Same on planes, btw. And what about trendy young people sitting on the floors in Euston and King's Cross, etc.? I see it all the time. And parents allowing their toddlers to crawl on airport floors?

I’m no clean freak but that’s horrendous

you are NOT being OTT!

wearing shoes inside us utterly revolting and so uncivilised.
regardless, it is your house, your rules.

if you want people to take their shoes off then unapologetically tell them to take their bloody shoes off! if there are any medical reasons that makes that impractical/difficult (mobility/arthritis etc), you might want to get yourself some of those disposable blue overshoes!

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2022/mar/17/the-science-is-in-wearing-shoes-inside-your-home-is-just-plain-gross

Yep. I’m british and I understand carpets keep houses warm but I hate them. Shoes on or off they are never really clean tbh. We’re too clumsy in our house anyway. We drop a cup of coffee no problem we just wash the floor. And don’t get me started on carpets in bathrooms and even kitchens and the occasional loo!

I travel regularly by train and am always amazed at fellow-travellers, proceeding to the end-of-carriage toilet in their socks!!!! Aaaaahhh and then putting their feet in those socks on seats......Nauseating.