Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that NT children miss out in school inclusion policies.

288 replies

empee47 · 06/07/2026 16:45

To think that inclusion policies in primary schools are almost never geared to helping academic, NT children get the best out of their education? They’re almost always designed to help the underdog - not denying this is necessary - but those at the top end of the spectrum don’t get the chance to shine as bright as they might otherwise do.

OP posts:
C0dename · 06/07/2026 19:29

C4tintherug · 06/07/2026 18:10

As a teacher I see this time and time again, I’m only 1 human, I have 1 pair of hands and I am physically unable to meet every single need of every single child. I have to help the weakest/ one having a meltdown/ badly behaved which generally leaves the G+T to fend for themselves. It’s not fair on them.
I worry about how we will compete as a country on an international playing field- our brightest kids are not pushed as much as they could be. Why do you think so many more kids from private schools end up at university and at oxbridge?
How will this affect our long term economic outlook? With so many kids needing accommodations- how many will be able to work?

You’re a teacher and don’t know that 67% to 73% of UK undergraduates admitted to Oxford and Cambridge come from state schools. Within Russel group unis 70-75% of state pupils are from the state sector.

Private schools are over represented ( for several reasons)as only 6% of children go to private schools so really it should be 94% of Oxbridge undergraduates that are from privates schools but state schools are clearly doing an excellent job at getting their pupils to the best unis with a lot less resources.

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:29

BravasPatatas · 06/07/2026 19:27

Many non SEN children disrupt classrooms. Where should they go?
My SEN child has never disrupted a classroom.

Pupil referral unit. We need zero tolerance. There are no consequences for bad behaviour in Scotland (where I am), the kids know they have full control and run riot. It’s a disaster.

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:28

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 06/07/2026 19:20

Where would you like these children to go? Or is it just a case of you don't want it to be your problem? Should disruptive children be in a SEN school? Should children who are not violent but do have special needs be in a SEN school? Yes they should be but there are no spaces. There aren't enough special schools. The criteria to get a space is ridiculous.
Blame the bloody government that shut the schools down and decided all kids could be included in mainstream but don't blame the children.
You are lucky, your DD can have extra coaching, you can help her. Children with SEN don't have that luxury.

We need to fund these schools to be opened, obviously. There is no other option.

BravasPatatas · 06/07/2026 19:27

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:15

Of course SEN kids deserve an education, but not in a classroom with other children if they are going to disrupt. Surely that’s obvious?

Many non SEN children disrupt classrooms. Where should they go?
My SEN child has never disrupted a classroom.

LathkillDale · 06/07/2026 19:25

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:15

Of course SEN kids deserve an education, but not in a classroom with other children if they are going to disrupt. Surely that’s obvious?

This thread is about not solutions to the problems of children with challenging behaviour, whether due to trauma, multiple deprivations or unmet SEN. It’s trying to whip up resentment towards SEN children.

Divide and conquer, to get the population fighting among themselves, having whipped them up into scape goating, so they don’t notice the real issue is the transfer of assets from ordinary people to the ultra wealthy, while the majority become wage slaves in a neo feudal system.

DillyDallyingAllDay · 06/07/2026 19:24

Actually I think you’re wrong. The more academically able children might not benefit from ‘inclusion’ policies but schools do stretch and do extra things for the most able. I know of one school where some children are taken out of assemblies once a week to stretch their writing skills

Girasoli · 06/07/2026 19:21

What's wrong with forest school? I think that's very useful for any DC. My 6 year old points out poisonous plants to me on walks now.

There are 2 DC who have 1 to 1s for SEN in DS1s classroom and neither of them are in the least bit violent.

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 06/07/2026 19:20

Brownwithnopezazz · 06/07/2026 17:25

Inclusion policies are absolutely toxic to the majority, and an obstacle to excellence. My children’s only negative memories of school are due to pupils who simply shouldn’t have been there. It’s
palpably absurd to favour the few at the expense of the many. When is this drivel going to stop? It’s truly surreal to hear how a child has yelled and walloped his way through the day at school, every day, so he can be included. Why don’t we tell the truth, that these inclusive policies are damaging.
WTF is so wrong with going somewhere tailored to your behaviour, instead of putting a fox in with pigeons, your fingers in your ears, and singing lalala, isn’t it lovely!

Where would you like these children to go? Or is it just a case of you don't want it to be your problem? Should disruptive children be in a SEN school? Should children who are not violent but do have special needs be in a SEN school? Yes they should be but there are no spaces. There aren't enough special schools. The criteria to get a space is ridiculous.
Blame the bloody government that shut the schools down and decided all kids could be included in mainstream but don't blame the children.
You are lucky, your DD can have extra coaching, you can help her. Children with SEN don't have that luxury.

empee47 · 06/07/2026 19:19

C4tintherug · 06/07/2026 18:10

As a teacher I see this time and time again, I’m only 1 human, I have 1 pair of hands and I am physically unable to meet every single need of every single child. I have to help the weakest/ one having a meltdown/ badly behaved which generally leaves the G+T to fend for themselves. It’s not fair on them.
I worry about how we will compete as a country on an international playing field- our brightest kids are not pushed as much as they could be. Why do you think so many more kids from private schools end up at university and at oxbridge?
How will this affect our long term economic outlook? With so many kids needing accommodations- how many will be able to work?

I empathise with you and I fully agree. It’s almost a crime to be academically ambitious here!

OP posts:
KateSixer · 06/07/2026 19:17

Namechangedforgoodreasons · 06/07/2026 17:33

It’s one of those things you’re not supposed to say, but I think that every time I see the poster that illustrates "equity" as opposed to "equality". With "equity" the three children are given different size boxes to stand on, so they can all see over the wall - but of course if the tallest was given the same size box as the shortest, he'd have an even better view…

This is such a well phrased post.

I was about to say that schools need to be careful that they don't take a lowest common denominator approach. It's vital that every child is stretched.

But you put it so much more subtly.

JassyRadlett · 06/07/2026 19:17

There are two issues here:

Inclusion done well can benefit all children, but many (I'd actually say most) lack the skills, resources or both to do it well or even to a passable level, and it becomes a waterbed - the disadvantage and relative harm just constantly shifts around, and as one problem is addressed it creates a new one.

The other issue, which is separate, is that particularly at primary there are almost no incentives to stretch high performing children, so scarce resources are almost inevitably put elsewhere.

Some like to paint the latter as a "no harm done" impact as the children in question will be meeting minimum standards, but there are two issues with this: first, is the purpose of education to help every child achieve their potential, or is it to get everyone to a basic standard; and second, it ignores the fact that a bright child is also a whole person with emotions and needs, and a school experience that doesn't meet those needs can have a significant impact.

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:17

Thechaseison71 · 06/07/2026 19:15

What about the right kids who are not pushed to achieve? Same 93% of parents who can't do private school..

If being bright means being ignored then many of the kids will get disillusioned and be bored hence thinking of mischief to do

Exactly! What about then and their rights to a fitting education? No one cares because even if they’re totally ignored they’re bright enough to hit the average performance needed..

titchy · 06/07/2026 19:16

empee47 · 06/07/2026 17:39

I would expect an inclusion policy to include all children. The spectrum I am referring to is academic ability ie at the top of the ability range if you object to the word ‘spectrum.’

Edited

Inclusion means bringing excluded children in. Not directing those resources at children who are already included.

I guess you also espouse ‘all lives matter’ as well.

Your children are bright and NT - they have the fucking world at their feet. And you want the world to provide yet more for them.

DelphiniumBlue · 06/07/2026 19:16

Octavia64 · 06/07/2026 18:29

Huh?

inclusion is about allowing children with disabilities to access mainstream.

it used to be the case that if a kid was in a wheelchair or similar they couldn’t go to mainstream no matter how bright they were.

inclusion as it started off was about making sure every child had access to an education.

the vast, vast majority of children who are in mainstream as a result of inclusion are NT but have other disabilities such as Down’s syndrome, cerebral palsy, epilepsy, etc.

many of them are of average or above average ability and previously would have been in special school simply because mainstream wasn’t wheelchair accessible/Deaf friendly etc.

these days teachers can wear microphones that go straight into a kids hearing aid.

Sadly most schools do not have sufficient facilities to allow full access for most physically disabled children. I have only seen one primary school which had a lift ( out of about 10-15 that I have worked in as a supply or more permanently).There are no children in my school ( approx 400 pupils) with epilepsy, Downs, or in a wheelchair. I have seen one blind child in a mainstream school. It's hard enough to accommodate a child with a broken arm or leg - if they can't go out at playtime/lunchtime, who is going to look after them? You can't leave them by themselves in a classroom. There are not enough staff to manage conditions like diabetes properly - I remember a horrible scenario where the class teacher ( NQT) was trying to deal with a newly diagnosed child whose condition required frequent monitoring, then analysis and sometimes action. The child was getting very upset, the teacher was trying to do the necessary ( testing, adjusting insulin etc) in private ( the cloakroom outside the classroom so not very private at all) while the rest of the class ran amok. There should have been 2 adults in that room all the time, but there weren't enough staff to cover that.
Schools need proper funding so they can staff to levels where all children are safe and making progress. I am still kept awake at night by thoughts of the children who we could not help enough, of the ones who left primary school functionally illiterate, whose maths wasn't good enough for them to be able to work out change or read a timetable or budget for their shopping. How are they going to function in secondary school, or in life? We are creating an underclass, the prison population of the future if we don't take steps to address gaps/huge holes in learning at an early stage. Investment now would save massive sums in the future.

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:15

LathkillDale · 06/07/2026 18:46

This just another SEN bashing thread in another guise, to persuade the population money is wasted on SEN children to soften the people up, for the removal of accountability and children’s legal rights to an education in the government’s recent proposals.

Of course SEN kids deserve an education, but not in a classroom with other children if they are going to disrupt. Surely that’s obvious?

Thechaseison71 · 06/07/2026 19:15

PoppyseedPurple · 06/07/2026 18:56

This thread is ableist and offensive to parents of children with SEND in the 93% of parents who can’t afford to, or don’t want to pay for private education.

What about the right kids who are not pushed to achieve? Same 93% of parents who can't do private school..

If being bright means being ignored then many of the kids will get disillusioned and be bored hence thinking of mischief to do

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:14

waterrat · 06/07/2026 19:01

Walk in the shoes of a parent of an autistic child op and know the unbelievable agony of seeing your child treated like a piece of rubbish to be be away by the system.

My bright kind and lovely autistic 12 year old has been out of school for months because her mainstream secondary were unwilling to give her the support she needed. I jave to watch her every day missing out.

She finds school a terrifying place without support.

You are ignorant and over privileged if you cant see the immense injustice faced by sen children trying jusy to keep their heads above water in a mainstream system

What sort of school environment do you want for your child?

Mumofoneandone · 06/07/2026 19:13

BeigeCardigan · 06/07/2026 16:49

Well, that’s something that’s easy for parents to do in their own time with their child.

Parents can do a lot but a bright, engaging, interested child who is bored in school can be completely switched off, start misbehaving, refusing to go to school etc. I've got one!!

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:12

SilenceInside · 06/07/2026 17:36

It’s an insane question. You’re questioning why children who don’t need inclusion policies aren’t the focus of them?? What?

An academic child without any additional needs will be able to access the curriculum as it stands and benefit from it. If the teaching is not stretching that child it is nothing at all to do with the measures put in place to support children who have additional needs. It’s like asking why a gifted athlete isn’t the focus of policies put in place to help physically disabled children access PE.

How can they ‘access the curriculum’ when the teacher spends the whole time trying to prevent the kids that lash out from throwing chairs and throttling classmates? What do you suggest the teacher does? Keep teaching and ignore it?

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 19:10

plasticplate · 06/07/2026 17:35

Are you peeved that your child didn't make it to a top university. If they are truly gifted they should be able to do from state school.

They couldn’t stay in a state school due to being a target of repeated assaults (yes the kids were charged with assault and no that made no difference whatsoever. My child was beaten up date after day). They now attend private. The difference in learning is truly staggering. All it takes is removing the violent and disruptive children and guess what? The teacher can teach in peace and the children can learn in peace.

We’re not private school fans. We were backed into a corner. But it’s an incredible education and worth every penny, simply because state schools cannot educate children properly due to the disruptions from kids who shouldn’t be there. Every child should be able to learn in peace and safety but they can’t

mintleavesandthyme · 06/07/2026 19:08

I think a lot of this could be solved with smaller class sizes and some extra TAs. Oh a bigger schools to allow for quieter/less densely occupied spaces.

but instead the government are closing small schools and forcing more and more kids into classrooms.

i know the teachers at our school can’t cope, they are quite honest about it. But they get no help, no support, no TAs

C0dename · 06/07/2026 19:05

MaidOfSteel · 06/07/2026 19:02

I think I get where you’re coming from, OP. Maybe the results of DEI being pushed and pushed to extremes, as we’re seeing in other public services nowadays.

Don’t be ridiculous!

twinkletoesimnot · 06/07/2026 19:02

The thing is, currently no one is benefiting- no one.
And it’s going to get worse.

MaidOfSteel · 06/07/2026 19:02

I think I get where you’re coming from, OP. Maybe the results of DEI being pushed and pushed to extremes, as we’re seeing in other public services nowadays.

waterrat · 06/07/2026 19:01

Walk in the shoes of a parent of an autistic child op and know the unbelievable agony of seeing your child treated like a piece of rubbish to be be away by the system.

My bright kind and lovely autistic 12 year old has been out of school for months because her mainstream secondary were unwilling to give her the support she needed. I jave to watch her every day missing out.

She finds school a terrifying place without support.

You are ignorant and over privileged if you cant see the immense injustice faced by sen children trying jusy to keep their heads above water in a mainstream system