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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do I have OCD?

109 replies

ToyStory20000008 · 06/07/2026 12:23

I grew up in a house that was only cleaned when people came to visit. This would happen about 4 times a year so we were all drafted in and it was very stressful. My sister has reacted to this by never cleaning her house and never inviting anyone round. I on the other hand like to have a house that if someone knocked on the door, they could walk in and I would not be embarrassed.
Family are now saying I have OCD and it is not healthy to live in such a clean house.

So I am setting out here what I aim to do and how often so you lovely people can tell me who you think is right.

Daily
keep kitchen and bathrooms clear of mess and tidy, wiping down kitchen surfaces after each meal
Hoover small entry hall to stop muck being walked in
Keep rest of house as tidy as possible

Every 1 to 2 weeks
Clean bathrooms
Hoover whole house
Dust whole house
Change and wash bedding and towels

Less often
Clean windows
clear our a cupboard
declutter
skirting boards

OP posts:
Factor37 · 06/07/2026 16:49

I'm not afraid of germs I just like pouring bleach or spraying antibac over them. I've always found it satisfying. Like a power thing rather than OCD I think. I certainly don't fret over using public toilets or touching door handles etc in public anyway and my house is not spotless in the slightest.

RestlessSnail · 06/07/2026 16:42

ToyStory20000008 · 06/07/2026 12:23

I grew up in a house that was only cleaned when people came to visit. This would happen about 4 times a year so we were all drafted in and it was very stressful. My sister has reacted to this by never cleaning her house and never inviting anyone round. I on the other hand like to have a house that if someone knocked on the door, they could walk in and I would not be embarrassed.
Family are now saying I have OCD and it is not healthy to live in such a clean house.

So I am setting out here what I aim to do and how often so you lovely people can tell me who you think is right.

Daily
keep kitchen and bathrooms clear of mess and tidy, wiping down kitchen surfaces after each meal
Hoover small entry hall to stop muck being walked in
Keep rest of house as tidy as possible

Every 1 to 2 weeks
Clean bathrooms
Hoover whole house
Dust whole house
Change and wash bedding and towels

Less often
Clean windows
clear our a cupboard
declutter
skirting boards

This seems quite reasonable to me, however OCD isn't really defined by what you do so much as
-Why you do it
-How flexible you can be
-How you would feel if you weren't to do it
-Whether it gets it in the way of your the rest of your life

Even mild OCD compulsions will interfere with aspects of your life.

Since you don't believe you have OCD why not show your family this website? https://www.ocduk.org/ocd/introduction-to-ocd/ so they understand & can hopefully see the difference

Introduction to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder | OCD-UK

https://www.ocduk.org/ocd/introduction-to-ocd/

RocketPanda · 06/07/2026 16:37

The OCD can weave itself into all facets of your life too. When my phone rings my first thought is someone is calling to say my children are dead. Catastrosizing everything in case my children are hurt and its my fault because I should have realised. Days out were an absolute mind fuck. School trips I still can't talk about without triggering panic.
I'm going to leave this thread now because I can feel some anxiety .

Chocolatefreak · 06/07/2026 16:35

I do similar, OP. I am a bit messy but ok on basic hygiene. Clean kitchen and bathroom. You sound fine and not obsessive.

outerspacepotato · 06/07/2026 16:34

Family are now saying I have OCD and it is not healthy to live in such a clean house.

You grew up in filth and you've broken out of the crab pot. The family accusing you of having a mental illness and being unhealthy living in an average clean house are trying to drag you back into the filth crabpot by spouting bullshit.

Look up crab mentality if you want some insight into the dynamics playing out here.

You know it's ok to be clean. You know you don't have OCD. But your family is accusing you with lies to get you back into the pot. That's a really toxic family dynamic and you might want to start distancing yourself. Grey rock them. Everything's fine, we're fine, that's it. Give them as little info on your life as possible.

menopausalfart · 06/07/2026 16:29

A person without OCD will also get intrusive thoughts. Did I turn the light off, gas off, unplug the iron, etc even when they know they have. A person with OCD will have these thoughts every day. In fact, these thoughts can dictate your whole day from the minute you wake up. They can be all consuming. I was diagnosed when I was very young. It started with numbers. If I gave my DM a kiss at night, it would have to be an even number of kisses. I wouldn't let her leave until it felt right. These compulsions were added to over the years. I have it somewhat under control now, but it can manifest itself without me realising it's happening.

Additup · 06/07/2026 16:28

Mistymaglets · 06/07/2026 16:08

In your post you actually used the words ...

" For some people who have OCD it is about being super clean and tidy"
And you left it at that.

This reduction is the stereotype, the meme, the misunderstanding, the ignorance.
In further posts you've explained yourself better, but your first post was absolutely lacking in any understanding of OCD.

My first post was brief because I was eating, but I knew what I meant 😂

Additup · 06/07/2026 16:27

KilkennyCats · 06/07/2026 15:47

Op’s cleaning routine as she described could not be seen as in any way compulsive 🤔
A bit on the lax side, if anything.

I agree, OP does not appear to have OCD.

noidea02 · 06/07/2026 16:20

innominate · 06/07/2026 15:09

You hoover daily? That could perhaps qualify as OCD.

Don’t be ridiculous! Unless accompanied by compulsions/intrusive thoughts of course it’s not!!

pigsDOfly · 06/07/2026 16:18

innominate · 06/07/2026 15:09

You hoover daily? That could perhaps qualify as OCD.

No it really couldn't unless the daily hoovering is accompanied by extreme anxiety and rituals around the needs to hoover and intrusive thoughts.

And it's highly unlikely that someone's OCD would centre solely around just hoovering the carpet.

3luckystars · 06/07/2026 16:18

Batties · 06/07/2026 12:50

No. It means you should educate yourself about what OCD is. It’s a debilitating mental health condition that has nothing to do with keeping a clean and tidy house. It’s highly offensive to those people who do have OCD to throw around the label so casually.

I agree with this. It’s nothing to do with a clean house and the cleaning you are doing is fairly standard. Even if someone did double that amount, daily, I still would not say ‘OCD’ because that’s a very serious thing to say and OCD is absolutely nothing to do with the amount of cleaning. It’s the headspace it takes.

Some people just like a clean house. Good.

Your family are only throwing this word at you to make themselves feel better about their dislike of cleaning.

SapphireSteel28 · 06/07/2026 16:18

OCD is a horrific condition. My DD has it, and I used to do before medication. You sound like a person with good hygiene who keeps her house clean and tidy.

HectorPlasm · 06/07/2026 16:15

Absolutely not

Unless you think the letters in OCD should be in alphabetical order, in which case you do ...

RocketPanda · 06/07/2026 16:13

I have OCD centered around cleaning. At its worst I clean because if I don't my children will get sick and die and it will be my fault because I didn't clean thoroughly enough to get rid of all germs and viruses. I can't even smell bleach anymore because I'm so desensitised to the smell, my hands were raw cracked and bleeding. I would get up and remove furniture from the rooms and only allow them back in once they were cleaned in bleach and water. I had two vacuum cleaners, one for upstairs and one for downstairs so I wasn't contaminating the different areas. When I left the house I would panic and obsess over missing a germ and it multiplying and spreading. The anxiety and control it had literally made me shake.
I am in recovery from it and have been for some years. Unfortunately its never gone completely and it sometimes whispers in the back of my mind.
Being clean and tidy is just that. OCD around cleanliness is something completely different.

Mistymaglets · 06/07/2026 16:08

Additup · 06/07/2026 15:37

I didn't say it was.

My response is in reply to the posters who were insistent OCD isn't about cleaning. I was merely pointing out that for some sufferers it is about cleaning compulsions, not all, that goes without saying, but for some it is.

I've read the thread and noted there are people on it discussing having an OCD diagnosis that manifests with excessive cleaning compulsions.

In your post you actually used the words ...

" For some people who have OCD it is about being super clean and tidy"
And you left it at that.

This reduction is the stereotype, the meme, the misunderstanding, the ignorance.
In further posts you've explained yourself better, but your first post was absolutely lacking in any understanding of OCD.

Larrythecatforpm · 06/07/2026 15:57

innominate · 06/07/2026 15:09

You hoover daily? That could perhaps qualify as OCD.

No OCD is like scrubbing till your hands are raw, I hoover as I have fluffy cats and if I don’t I start sneezing. 😂

ThisIsHowItStarts · 06/07/2026 15:56

rumblegrumble · 06/07/2026 15:50

Yeah, was wondering if I was the only one thinking that's not normal 😕

I give the bathroom a basic clean daily, hoover kitchen every day and rest of house couple of times a week, change bedsheets at least weekly, and wash towels every 3-4 uses. I definitely didn't realise I was a clean freak!

Yes this is basically my cleaning routine too!

Allseeingallknowing · 06/07/2026 15:53

innominate · 06/07/2026 15:09

You hoover daily? That could perhaps qualify as OCD.

Hoovering everyday is necessary if you have hairy pets or messy children, otherwise twice a week is enough,imo

HortiGal · 06/07/2026 15:52

Fully agree with @Darragon
MyDD is clinically diagnosed, it's a very serious MH illness, not some wife hoovering ffs

rumblegrumble · 06/07/2026 15:50

ThisIsHowItStarts · 06/07/2026 13:18

I actually think cleaning the bathroom, changing bedsheets and hoovering every 1-2 weeks is more on the dirty side than the clean!

Yeah, was wondering if I was the only one thinking that's not normal 😕

I give the bathroom a basic clean daily, hoover kitchen every day and rest of house couple of times a week, change bedsheets at least weekly, and wash towels every 3-4 uses. I definitely didn't realise I was a clean freak!

KilkennyCats · 06/07/2026 15:47

Additup · 06/07/2026 15:41

But what you've described is OCD manifesting as a cleaning compulsion i.e. you like things clean and tidy, but in an unhealthy obsessive way.

We're saying the same thing, but in a different way.

Op’s cleaning routine as she described could not be seen as in any way compulsive 🤔
A bit on the lax side, if anything.

Additup · 06/07/2026 15:41

Cara707 · 06/07/2026 15:37

No not really. You can be obsessed with order and very distressed if things aren't in order. You can be very distressed by things being unhygienic and stuck competing cleaning compulsions or showering or sanitising/ handwashing for hours every day but you don't just like things clean/tidy.

But what you've described is OCD manifesting as a cleaning compulsion i.e. you like things clean and tidy, but in an unhealthy obsessive way.

We're saying the same thing, but in a different way.

Additup · 06/07/2026 15:37

Mistymaglets · 06/07/2026 14:54

Being " super clean and tidy" is not the same as having OCD.

Please read the thread.

I didn't say it was.

My response is in reply to the posters who were insistent OCD isn't about cleaning. I was merely pointing out that for some sufferers it is about cleaning compulsions, not all, that goes without saying, but for some it is.

I've read the thread and noted there are people on it discussing having an OCD diagnosis that manifests with excessive cleaning compulsions.

Cara707 · 06/07/2026 15:37

Additup · 06/07/2026 14:45

But for some people who have OCD it is about being super clean and tidy!!

No not really. You can be obsessed with order and very distressed if things aren't in order. You can be very distressed by things being unhygienic and stuck competing cleaning compulsions or showering or sanitising/ handwashing for hours every day but you don't just like things clean/tidy.

Mistymaglets · 06/07/2026 15:16

innominate · 06/07/2026 15:09

You hoover daily? That could perhaps qualify as OCD.

Oh give over.
I hoover twice a day. I don't have OCD.
But I have seen a loved one in absolute torment with intrusive thoughts and mental compulsions. It was, and is, heartbreaking it pushed the whole family to the brink.
It required intense therapy and medication.
OCD is absolute torture.

To equate that suffering with pushing a bloody Dyson around frequently is ridiculous and insulting.

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