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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Being told that as a size 18 I can’t wear certain clothes

546 replies

isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 11:09

I do appreciate that when posting canvassing for opinions on outfits etc., you will get all sorts of responses.

But I have been told a few times now that as a size 18, I should cover up and not expose too much skin, basically purely because of my size.

AIBU to think this isn’t okay? I have as much a right to get my shoulders out as any other size!

OP posts:
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18
Wickedlittledancer · 06/07/2026 14:44

isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 13:26

Oh wicked, do you know her weight?

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Op gently, you don’t need to know someone’s stats to know if they are over weight or not unless at the edge, it’s visible. That woman is visibly overweight, and likely obese.

OutInTheWild · 06/07/2026 14:44

Swiftie1878 · 06/07/2026 14:29

It’s programmed to ‘please’ its user.

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But then the real photos from the wedding will come and be completely different. It’s crazy and pointless.

MiffedatMP · 06/07/2026 14:44

Just ignore everyone. I am 28 stone and a size 32-34 and I wear whatever the hell I like. I'm a human being and we come in all shapes and sizes. If people don't like the look of me they don't have to stare and dwell on it.

Original poster
isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 14:44

HowManyHints · 06/07/2026 14:41

I most certainly was not rude but if you think you're a size 14 then crack on!

I think you are a lady who cannot bear to be criticised not matter how gently it is given and I did give it gently.

So here it is a bit more harshly-you do not look good in that spotted dress and you are in for a sad and sorrowful disappointment if you think you are going to resemble, in any way, that AI picture.

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It is rude. I am very open that I am an 18, but that the white dress is oversized. You felt the need to challenge it - why?

OP posts:
Disturbia81 · 06/07/2026 14:41

Jumbaree · 06/07/2026 11:23

I wouldn’t wear a bikini cause my stretch marks would turn most peoples stomach’s. I ask myself if people want to see them and the answer is no. I can’t see the issue with shoulders. Obese people in crop tops is never a flattering look, and I cannot abide seeing topless men wandering around either. Grim.

This is such a sad view of yourself!

HowManyHints · 06/07/2026 14:41

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I most certainly was not rude but if you think you're a size 14 then crack on!

I think you are a lady who cannot bear to be criticised not matter how gently it is given and I did give it gently.

So here it is a bit more harshly-you do not look good in that spotted dress and you are in for a sad and sorrowful disappointment if you think you are going to resemble, in any way, that AI picture.

Original poster
isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 14:39

Gettingbysomehow · 06/07/2026 14:37

Wear what you want as long as your bottom biscuits arent on display. Nobody of any size should be showing bum cheeks.
Crocs should be a punishable crime.

Bottom biscuits 🤣

OP posts:
Gettingbysomehow · 06/07/2026 14:37

Wear what you want as long as your bottom biscuits arent on display. Nobody of any size should be showing bum cheeks.
Crocs should be a punishable crime.

isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 14:37

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Goldenbear · 06/07/2026 14:35

You look good in the Brown dress, the cut does suit you!

Newnamesameme · 06/07/2026 14:35

BagaChips · 06/07/2026 14:32

No they aren't, they are talking about OPs original thread in style and beauty about two other dresses on different models

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Oh thanks

Goldenbear · 06/07/2026 14:33

I stopped posting on S&B as I think the S is a bit pseudo Bond Street, it used to be more interesting. I got wholly lambasted on there for liking some shoes but I knew the poster also hated a band from the 00s I really liked, that they hated original Camden, pre corporate or probably didn't even grow up there and they loved tacky musicals, I knew we would definitely not have the same sense of style so why would I want to take on board such comments.

HowManyHints · 06/07/2026 14:32

ChatGPT has reduced the size of your body, it has even slimmed down your hands!

You are a large lady-you look larger than a size 18-do you mean a size 18 in loose clothing like your spotty dress? I would probably take a 12 in that dress but for more fitted items, I need a 14.

Many clothes will not look as good on you as a slimmer lady but if you are confident and happy, then wear what you think shows you to your best advantage.

Put the outfit on, look in the mirror, do you approve? If so, don't ask anyone else.

BagaChips · 06/07/2026 14:32

Newnamesameme · 06/07/2026 14:30

I'm confused. are people saying the woman in the brown dress is overweight? The picture of the brown halterneck?

No they aren't, they are talking about OPs original thread in style and beauty about two other dresses on different models

Newnamesameme · 06/07/2026 14:30

I'm confused. are people saying the woman in the brown dress is overweight? The picture of the brown halterneck?

Swiftie1878 · 06/07/2026 14:29

ImPamDoove · 06/07/2026 14:17

Why does ChatGPT do this? Unless you ask it to slim down your arms or whatever, why can’t it keep things real?

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It’s programmed to ‘please’ its user.

Loulouu8 · 06/07/2026 14:29

YANBU, ignore the horrible comments

OutInTheWild · 06/07/2026 14:26

isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 14:16

I look pretty similar to that. Sorry if it offends you to see someone fat and confident in their body

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It doesn’t offend me. I think it’s sad that it has changed your body, and if I was using it for outfits planning, I’d want to see what I actually looked like.

OutInTheWild · 06/07/2026 14:23

ImPamDoove · 06/07/2026 14:17

Why does ChatGPT do this? Unless you ask it to slim down your arms or whatever, why can’t it keep things real?

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My friend did one of herself, her child and their dog and asked for it to be in a certain style and it got rid of her child’s birthmark. She didn’t show her child, she just said it didn’t work because she didn’t want her child thinking her birthmark was something that needed ‘fixing’.

Her dog has a couple of teeth that stick out even when his mouth is closed and he’s not the most handsome dog and it fixed the teeth and made him look much more aesthetically pleasing. Funny for a dog, but could be very damaging for a human to have their ‘flaws’ fixed.

SwanRivers · 06/07/2026 14:22

I love that ChatGPT has added nail varnish! 😁

Dery · 06/07/2026 14:19

@isaidmaybeyoure - I'm also a size 18. I think you look fab in the brown dress. I think so much of fashion is to do with the shape of the clothes and different shapes are suited to different body sizes/shapes.

huffdragon · 06/07/2026 14:18

isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 11:25

But that’s not what I asked.

I asked about a halter neck dress and got told “as you’re a size 18, it’s far too much flesh on display”

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It’s interesting how, according to some people, some flesh seems to be ok and other flesh doesn’t. Wear what you like. It’s your body and your life.

ImPamDoove · 06/07/2026 14:17

OutInTheWild · 06/07/2026 14:11

Would you not rather than it made you look what you actually look like though?

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Why does ChatGPT do this? Unless you ask it to slim down your arms or whatever, why can’t it keep things real?

user1471538283 · 06/07/2026 14:17

Oh love wear what you want. I spent my youth worried about the size of my arse and now I don't care and it's the least of my problems. I bet you look fabulous!

Life is so short.

BatchCookBabe · 06/07/2026 14:16

isaidmaybeyoure · 06/07/2026 14:09

Yes, the black and white dots is me

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Well you look fine! 😘 Ignore the haters. As has been said, some people think ANYone over a size 10 is a big heifer who should not come out of their house in daylight!