AIBU to feel overwhelmed by my husband's constant monologuing?

Do they? That's really intriguing. Which ones?

What exactly do you mean by 'WW3'? Think it through, what exactly would likely happen if you challenged him?

Do you mean he would hit you?
That he would shout at you?
That he would burst into tears?

Once you have your answer, decide if you are afraid of that outcome.
Are you afraid of him?

Or do you just avoid 'unpleasantness' for a quiet life? Because you are not getting a quiet life, so perhaps you have nothing to lose by vigorously and emphatically challenging him to STFU. As often as necessary.

Ah yes @Mounjaronewbie25 he does the phoning thing too! Just to tell me he's "on the road" and there follows a running commentary of something that's happening on a roundabout somewhere and an Audi turning right too fast and "can you hear me now?" ... etc...etc ...etc.

I just came across this. The algorithm is strong this evening.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZNREMdpo9/

But so what if you have World War III?
You can't carry on living like this

Anyone else deal with this? Hubby monologuing. Constantly, all day, every day.

It's a stream-of-consciousness - literally everything he is thinking, re-enacting entire conversations he has had (pretending to do the voice of the other person too), things he must remember tomorrow, various ailments, stupid drivers, how hot/cold he is, huffing, puffing, groaning, humming, whistling. It is incessant, repetitive, there are no gaps, and I realise that I plan my life around trying to get breaks from it.

He is always trying to get me to react too "what do you think of this?" "do you like that?" and I HAVE to agree with whatever it is. A quick "yes" or "ok" from me and he's back to it. It's like he's checking that I am still paying close attention.

Thing, is, I feel completely lost here. Everything is about him, his plans, his headache, his sunburn, his job. There isn't a moment for me. If I do speak, I can get roughly half a sentence out before he tells me "I know that already" or "that reminds me of a time when I .......", or how he's done it better or knows better ... and bam we are back to him again.

I might be peri - I might be over-sensitive? But I am forgetting who "I" am. I feel like I just don't matter anymore, because he is so great and wonderful and interesting and has done everything just far more brilliantly than anyone else. He has lost all sight of me being a person with my own thoughts and opinions (which - shock - might be different from his sometimes!). Arggghhhh. What can I do? I feel like I am going mad.

Your actually building up quite a monologue on here @Kingdomofsleep

I'm not trying to be mean, really - just... are you aware how much you're posting about yourself on a thread about someone else's relationship?

Wow - I was away at the weekend and have come back to so many replies! Thank you all so much. I am amazed at how many other people are the recipients of these endless dreary speeches. My takeaway/realisation is that it takes two - I have enabled it really by sitting there passively listening, yet quietly seething underneath.

He won't cope with "STFU" at all, or anything along those lines. We'd have WW3.

Something reminds me of what they teach you about fire prevention - there's heat, fuel and air. Take one of those things away and the fire doesn't happen.

So.... if I simply remove my ears from the situation, then he cannot monologue. I think this is my best bet by far! Thanks again for all your replies - many of them have really made me chuckle!

What exactly do you mean by 'WW3'? Think it through, what exactly would likely happen if you challenged him?

Do you mean he would hit you?
That he would shout at you?
That he would burst into tears?

Once you have your answer, decide if you are afraid of that outcome.
Are you afraid of him?

Or do you just avoid 'unpleasantness' for a quiet life? Because you are not getting a quiet life, so perhaps you have nothing to lose by vigorously and emphatically challenging him to STFU. As often as necessary.

Wow - I was away at the weekend and have come back to so many replies! Thank you all so much. I am amazed at how many other people are the recipients of these endless dreary speeches. My takeaway/realisation is that it takes two - I have enabled it really by sitting there passively listening, yet quietly seething underneath.

He won't cope with "STFU" at all, or anything along those lines. We'd have WW3.

Something reminds me of what they teach you about fire prevention - there's heat, fuel and air. Take one of those things away and the fire doesn't happen.

So.... if I simply remove my ears from the situation, then he cannot monologue. I think this is my best bet by far! Thanks again for all your replies - many of them have really made me chuckle!

I'm not the person you've quoted but I have been shushed before as it were. I think the non-nice way to do it is making it personal using words like Always or Never - eg "youre always talking too much, you never let me get a word in" (hurtful, even if true). Instead the nice way is to make it instantaneous - eg "I'm concentrating on something else right now" or "can I tell you about my day now" or "I just need a bit of quiet time right now". Hopefully with enough repetition then op's dh will get the point, and if he doesn't, he's a bit slow to make connections and that's a problem in itself.

How would you feel if someone touched you gently on the arm, and said in a nice voice, 'Hey! My turn to speak, now, Clearlyy'?

Would that also be upsetting or would you be glad they hadn't endured the monolgue while getting increasingly agitated, but instead encouraged you to have a fairer exchange of conversation?

How would you like people to deal with it so that you feel comfortable but their needs are met too?

Thank you for this, I really needed it spelt out and I'm reassured I'm not like this...! That sounds maddening, you are very patient.

I'd literally get a sore throat if I spoke every thought out loud like that. I do do most of the talking when it's me and dh but only when I have something (slightly) interesting to say, not like literally a running commentary of me clicking on a website.

I was thinking about this overnight and my suggested solution...this is probably not a good solution for everyone depending on the ages of the chatterboxes in question. But I work as a teacher in a school and I'm literally talking nearly all day (and listening to my pupils ofc but I'm still doing the majority of the talking) and when I get home I'm quite subdued. In the summer holidays I've got a lot more to say to dh in the evenings because I haven't been at work.

What these chatty husbands need is a busy talkative job or volunteering. Say, in a school or charity shop or similar. Just chatting away all day then they'll be quiet when they get home.