AIBU to refuse GTA for my 14-year-old despite peer pressure?

I think I allowed it around this age. He’d been asking for ages. I told him my objections and made him agree not to play story mode. He just wanted to drive cars (and shoot people). I know my son. He is mature and was never going to become a misogynist or violent criminal. He is 19 now and hasn’t played it for years. The obsession was quite short lived.

in what way ?

@Jorge14 end of the year gta6 will be released and youll need a ps5 for it

Good for you. There are some FABULOUS parents on this thread - not

in certain aspects assassins creed is similar at times especially black flag with the pirates

It’s the inherent misogyny that’s the issue with GTA as far as I’m concerned. I had a whole conversation with my boys about it (along with so many other conversations about misogyny) and was never clear it was never going to be played in my house. They moved right on to assassins creed and never asked again.

It’s a game. Everyone knows it’s just a game. I don’t get the fuss about this at all.

Of course all mothers do, but it's not just my opinion - plenty of people have told me how lovely they are! Youth group leaders, teachers, parents of their friends (male and female) I spend a lot of time with them and have never seen a hint of misogyny. They've grown up in a family of strong women and definitely see women as equals.

I always said no to GTA at home, he played it at friends’ houses but it’s an 18 for a reason! Would’ve let him at 16 but every was in to another game by then so it was never a major issue.
i do sympathise w the bullying thing though- is there another game they all play that is more suitable?

Based alone on the graphic nature of the sex scenes at the strip club I’d recommend not allowing it yet!

I have three sons, all gamers. They're grown up now, but I remember the arguments about them wanting an earlier version of GTA back then. I allowed it at 16, but not before. The trouble was, if the eldest was playing it his two younger brothers would want to as well, and they were 15 and 12 at the time, but the 12 year old fortunately wasn't particularly interested as it's not his type of game. I remember having conversations with them about the content. They've turned out alright anyway.

Because he was (via all his friends) exposed to it already. We did talk about how it was showing things that aren't real, that are exaggerated and even like a caricatute. Just like rap and hip-hop videos, which he also likes and can easily access on YouTube, or some manga and comics that his brother likes that is sexually charged.

I think that's a fair point. However, lots of music and films are also made that contain these themes too, you can't just ban access to everything. Teens will soon be adults, they need autonomy with guard rails - I didn't buy it for him, he spent his own money. We spoke about the themes in it and I challenged him to think about how women are represented in it.

I’m going to get flamed but my Ds is 14 and we will be getting it for him. He plays online with all his friends from school- he has a gaming room next to our living room and we can hear every word (!) and they will all be playing it. It’s easy to say don’t give in to peer pressure but it’s absolutely awful to be the one left out and a lot of people saying it would be something else - why give them anything to be ostracised for if you don’t need to? My Ds has watched lots of things and played lots of things others here would be horrified by but I really think it depends on the child and their maturity etc. We have a very good close relationship and talk about things together all the time; he’s very clued up about violence in games not being real / dangers of talking to strangers online etc etc. Ultimately you have to make your own choice but it will certainly mean your Ds is left out somewhat if everyone else has it and he doesn’t. That’s just the world we live in now.

If my husband played GTA in a room with 1 of our children I'd go nuts. He is a gamer, has every Nintendo system since the NES and hundreds of games. Thank God he's not into violent mysogyny. I'd seriously question the motives of a man wanting to play that. He plays sports games, final fantasy, zelda, various similar things, platform and roleplay and football manager.

Oh that’s helpful to know.

How do you feel about giving money to a game that has misogyny and violence towards women in it?

Why would you let a 12 year be exposed to that?

It's a horrifically mysogynistic game, the violence levels especially against women, I genuinely don't know how any normal person would want to play that. No way I'd allow it for a young impressionable teen.

Stick to your decision OP, good on you for doing so.

What about the fact that you can have sex with a sex worker and then beat her up to get your money back?

That crosses a line for me and I will not have it in my house and would not accept any one playing it in my house. The gamification of violence towards women is not something I will contribute to.

All mothers of sons believe that their boys are "lovely young men" though dont they? Even though we know that lots of young men are not lovely at all, especially not towards women.

I looked into this quite a lot when ds wanted it. I'd resisted until he got to 15, then did some research. Online and story mode are different. I spoke to ds about the misogyny and how offensive it is and there's a way you can bypass story mode (which is where the worst of this is) on set up. I told ds he could have it if he didn't play it on story mode, and he said he only wanted the other mode anyway. There's still swearing and violence, but we've never been particularly precious about swearing (films, music) and ds isn't predisposed to violence, and knows that heists and drug dealing are no way to make a living in real life! Seven months down the line and he's tired of it already tbh.

I take this position too.

If it didn’t have the misogynistic violence I’d be more flexible potentially. So far I’ve stuck to the age limits. He’s asked for CoD and I’ve said no but if all his friends start playing, that’s one I might consider.