To have told my sister she was unprofessional and inappropriate? * [Content warning: concerns baby loss]

That sort of extreme lack of empathy has got to be suggesting a personality disorder surely? That's not normal at all is it? You say she has other narcissistic traits and her response to being called out over this is typical. NPD is much more prevalent than people appreciate, 1 in a 100 of the population are diagnosed, but most aren't - 1 in 20 (or more) likely to be the prevalence in the general population.

The problem is OP that you will never get accountability from her by calling out her behaviour. She will always be the victim, you mum has obviously learnt this - and as your approach was very gentle I expect you probably have too. You weren't wrong to do it, but it was never going to get the response you'd hope for.

her client would be gutted to know this. its a private personal photo and does not need her judgement. She should lose her job over this and it is such an invasion of this persons privacy. losing a child should not be something to mock

Why on earth would she have done that. How utterly nasty!

She should not be doing the job. People are sacked for less. Absolutely disgusting and also upsetting for you to have to see.
She sounds unhinged.

What is all this "gently" telling someone who is been an absolute odious cretin? If it had been my sister, they'd be no 'gently' telling her anything. I'd also reported her to whoever she works for. Poor woman having her dead baby shared about like it's a picture of a plate of food. Sick little witch.

That's offensive to autistic people!

That's disgusting and I'd actually report her to her employer if she's in a caring role (social worker, OT, carer, housing officer etc).

Has something happened to your sister to make her so shut off from normal human feelings? Perhaps we should feel sorry for her.

We don't need policing either, thanks.

Taking umbridge with someone's language but not with the vile actions that provoked that response?

What is wrong with people?

Absolutely outrageous.

Erm, did you mean to @ me? All I said was fair enough.

Honestly if it was my sister I'd be cutting all contact forever.

@nomas Well we don't need all the swearing now, do we?
I work wirh neurodiverse people as an integral part of my job and also have an autistic brother who struggles to understand certain social rules and the "gravity" of passing away.
Surely you know autism is a very wide ranging spectrum? Just because you understand doesn't mean everyone else does.

To be fair, I think the vast majority of people - whether they have/want children of their own or not - would very clearly understand that parents who lose a baby will be devastated and heartbroken, and won't just see their loss as 'a bit of a laugh', like this vile woman clearly does.

I would be reporting her to these people, with screenshots of the offending posts and the filmed clips. National Trading Standards Estate and Letting Agency Teams - National Trading Standards Immediately. She is a morally-bankrupt disgrace.

Your sister's behaviour is revolting. I hope that one day she will mature enough to be ashamed of herself.

She should be reported for this, total breach of confidentiality and lack of respect.
Disgusting
Also FYI pp being ND does not make you a dick!

Fair enough, I missed that.

Yeah that’s dreadful. I’d be furious if I caught wind of someone making fun of a DC I lost. You can make fun of a couch, not an incident. Your sister was unprofessional but also childish. I’d expect that kind of joke from a teenager.

Oh give over. As someone who lives in a household of ND people, it really fucking irks me when this line gets trotted out about people with autism being insensitive and frankly nasty people.

The OP’s sister is a cunt. She’s a cunt because she’s a cunt.

@nomas It was one of the first things I asked!!! 😀

Really?

So why not ask her if her sister is neurodiverse first? I'm ND too, are you now going to womansplain ND to me too.

she routinely shares picture of people's homes and is rude about them? Why did you EVER go along with this?

@nomas Because some people understand that neurodiverse people may see the world a different way?
OP has since clarified that sister is not neurodiverse so we can rule this out.
It is simply a case of unacceptable behaviour here.

Does she have something on her website or in a contract with sellers to say how their data will be stored and used ? I'd bet the farm there's nothing in there about sharing on my family social media group.