AIBU to be angry my husband opposes my major promotion?

Congratulations, OP! The good news is you can afford outside help if your husband doesnt step up. I think the next few months will be illuminating in terms of his contribution to family life and if its enough.

I’m so pleased to read you took the job. Well done.

Well done OP. Absolutely the right decision. Good luck in your new role and let's hope your husband steps up. If he doesn't, you know what to do. You've got this! 🌻💪😎

So delighted to read this update.
I really do hope you review things carefully and get legal advice to look at divorce.

Every year you remain with him he will inevitably take more from you while using you.

He enjoys the lifestyle without contributing or supporting.

Quietly organise yourself so that he becomes superfluous to needs.

Up to him if he actually wants to be in his childrens lives long-term or is just around to live off their mother.

Yep. Before he becomes entitled to wven more of your pension pot

Get rid of the husband, get a nanny, congratulations on your new job!!

Ahh brilliant news, well done OP. Best of luck xx

Except that’s not the story at all so you’ve just made something up to suit the poor man agenda. The OP has been doing most of the domestic and childcare tasks and she still will for a lot of the time. He’s just going to sacrifice a couple of days of lolling in bed and do a couple of the bath/bed routines.

That’s great news op. Have you sat him down and said you know, if you don’t step up and do some active parenting and support me for a change, I think I will start to wonder how this marriage benefits me. Marriages should benefit both people. I’ve supported your career, and I regret that if it turns out you can’t support me. I certainly will not go back to that because you’re so unsupportive, if that’s an outcome you’re hoping for.

I agree, unless you sort it out yourself now,@Bigjob1234, you are likely to find yourself in all kinds of trouble come September. Unless you are able to have a good discussion with your husband and sort your shared responsibilities out very soon, you are going to have to think of yourself as a single parent from now on and be prepared that extra help when you start your new job will have to come from a reliable source you pay for out of your salary rise.

Excellent. Now sort a nanny and how things are going to work. Think like a single parent, because that’s what you are. He brings zero to the table and you’re like wonder woman! He doesn’t deserve you and you deserve more!

He wasn’t sorting anything out anyway. He was lying in bed drinking coffee while she was getting the kids up and ready and sorting everything out as well as working. And I don’t think she is assuming anything, she just wants him to be happy for her achievements and engaging in a discussion about how it could work.

Congratulations @Bigjob1234 on getting the offer and on accepting it. I have followed the thread hoping that you would take the job because something similar happened with us. Huge difference was DH took over parenting full time. He gave up his lower paid job for a few years then built up part time and then full time. Best Wishes.

Well done and good luck with the new role.

Think you need to sit down again with DH to discuss how it will work, otherwise it might be a bit of a shit show when you start and distress to you and DC

Congratulations. Absolutely the right decision.

Yay. Congrats OP.

Firstly, congratulations on your new job. It is a major achievement, however from your family set-up it sounds like he'll ?have to pick up all the things that fall through the cracks if you're not around.

If you reversed this as a man valuing his career and assuming his less well paid wife will sort everything out for the family (you said that job involves a lot of stress/ travel), we'd all think he was being a bit of a knob.

I've turned down better paid jobs so that our family can have a lifestyle that works for us and gives us a good quality of life. Unless your family are on board with this job move, this isn't going to work. You are after all part of a team at home.

I’m delighted you’ve taken the promotion, wishing you every success with it and whatever you do, do not allow your DH to sabotage it in any way,

Congratulations OP, I was lurking and hoping that you would take the job offer :)

I really hope your DH steps up. It's so important to be a team in these situations. I don't know if this would help: different circs etc. I'm a single mum of 2DC (completely solo parenting as the DC has full residency with me and no overnights with ex). I work FT as a nurse, nothing like your job but shift work and long days. When I was with ex, I was the breadwinner too, and had to pay for childcare as ex wasn't stepping up. It was a hard slog and I'd beat myself up for not being about more for the kids, but they now say that they are proud of me for doing what I could and not quitting.

Wishing you all the best x

Good choice! Congratulations !

So pleased for you OP. I hope your husband steps up. I don’t think he realises how lucky he is.

Well done, OP. Delighted for you. It will take a bit of time for new schedule to settle, so be patient with yourselves.

Congratulations, you have done the right thing. Your children will be proud of you even if your husband doesn't like his cosy life disturbed.

Many congratulations! Enjoy the new challenge!