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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Affair or not

30 replies

ohh · 01/07/2026 13:07

My sisters husband has been messaging a lady saying she is beautiful and they have obviously been manipulated as elderly and the ‘ lady’ asked for money for a dress as in my body would look good in this.

He has paid so far £609 to her and they have in the past been friends. Not very close just knew each other sane circles etc.

aware she kissed him only.

I said he is having an affair or trying to.

sister said not

am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Silverbirchleaf · 01/07/2026 14:13

Definitely emotional affair, and entering ‘ full’ affair territory.

if nothing else, isn’t she angry that he’s given her £600! That alone would make me mad.

Glasgew1770 · 01/07/2026 14:13

So he’s married, but is messaging another woman telling her that she’s beautiful, bought her a dress because her “body would look good in it”, kissed her, and is giving her money, and is hiding all of this?

Even if they aren’t having sex, it’s not really acceptable is it?

worldshottestmom · 01/07/2026 14:11

ohh · 01/07/2026 14:09

She only found about by accident as in he was hiding it which made me suspicious

Yes, affairs usually are hidden

ohh · 01/07/2026 14:09

She only found about by accident as in he was hiding it which made me suspicious

OP posts:
worldshottestmom · 01/07/2026 13:20

He's chatting to her, complimenting her, giving her hundreds of pounds and has kissed her? Is there any other definition of an affair?