Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to consider moving to Wales for family and lower costs

111 replies

southerngirl10 · 01/07/2026 12:52

We have been racking our brains about what to do about the following situation for the last year and it doesn't seem to get resolved. Sorry, it's long:

We live in the South East of England. Our ds is 16, our dd is 11. My dh and I are both in our 50s.

We are trying to choose between going to a small village in Wales or staying here.

My dh has a part time driving job which is proving to be stressful. I have started care work part time over the last 6 months, which I'm finding a little bit boring.

We have a gardening business and work in that when we aren't working in the part time jobs. I also have a day where I teach a yoga class and offer holistic treatments. After working so hard, we don't have a lot of savings.

We rent. Our landlord agreed to let us stay in the accommodation until my son finished his exams and then a month or two after that.

My dh has been offered a job near his hometown - driving, but it looks like it might be less stressful. I would then have to find care work until I can build up gardening work and my practice again.

My ds has offered a college place in Wales, near the village ds is from and my dd has been offered a place in a school in our local area here (which has a good ofsted rating) and one in the Welsh village (which is underachieving but is classed as friendly and welcoming).

The kids want to go to Wales. They will have family there and a chance of being in a community.

Rents here in the South East are eyewatering, plus council tax, etc. If we move they would be a fraction of the price. My dd would be able to come home and sit with nanny on days when we are both in work.

We are struggling with the fact that we would have to give up our gardening clients, but we may have to move about ten miles away from our city here in the south east, to afford a new rental, so our dd would have to come home from school and be alone for one or two days a week. She's also have a bus journey.

We just feel that we have been isolated here in the south east of England. The village in Wales is rough and ready, but friendly.

Any thoughts would be appreciated.

OP posts:
Original poster
southerngirl10 · 01/07/2026 13:32

tilypu · 01/07/2026 13:29

How often do you see your gardening clients?

Could one of you pop down and find a b&b for a few days every month? Keep that going while you build things up elsewhere?

I know it's a lot of travel, and you may have already ruled it out, especially given you have children.

We thought of finding other gardeners and giving them the jobs while we take 10% for finding them the jobs. I have noticed that working as a gardener has become quite trendy around here. We are having less work. Hopefully in Wales it's following the same trend without so many people doing it.

OP posts:
Original poster
southerngirl10 · 01/07/2026 13:29

JoaNiic · 01/07/2026 13:26

Tell the kids thst you’ll try it for a few years to see if it works. Give it a go. If it doesn’t work, rethink.

It's just that I'm 53 and my dh is 59. If we were ten years younger our ages wouldn't feel so important in the 'getting the next job if we need to' stakes.

OP posts:
tilypu · 01/07/2026 13:29

How often do you see your gardening clients?

Could one of you pop down and find a b&b for a few days every month? Keep that going while you build things up elsewhere?

I know it's a lot of travel, and you may have already ruled it out, especially given you have children.

JoaNiic · 01/07/2026 13:26

Tell the kids thst you’ll try it for a few years to see if it works. Give it a go. If it doesn’t work, rethink.

HairyToity · 01/07/2026 13:26

I'd go to Wales. We live in North East Wales and would rather be stuck in Wales than the South East any day of the week.

Original poster
southerngirl10 · 01/07/2026 13:25

OtterandaRock · 01/07/2026 13:23

Definitely move to Wales. I don't know anyone with genuine reason to move who has regretted doing so.
Good luck.

Thank you. The Welsh are so friendly. I'm just frozen with fear about moving into the unknown. Lots of 'what-ifs' at the moment.

OP posts:
Original poster
southerngirl10 · 01/07/2026 13:23

Marvellousmeadows · 01/07/2026 13:19

Where exactly as I live close by ? You also have to take into consideration gardening fees will have to be reduced as you won’t get highly paid rates here.

Brynmawr. We get £25 - £30 per hour in the south east of england. We were told, £20ph in Abergavenny or Newport.

OP posts:
OtterandaRock · 01/07/2026 13:23

Definitely move to Wales. I don't know anyone with genuine reason to move who has regretted doing so.
Good luck.

Marvellousmeadows · 01/07/2026 13:19

Where exactly as I live close by ? You also have to take into consideration gardening fees will have to be reduced as you won’t get highly paid rates here.

Original poster
southerngirl10 · 01/07/2026 13:15

RockLobsterRockLobster · 01/07/2026 13:04

I think it sounds that one the whole, your family would benefit from moving to Wales, especially as your husband has family there. If the children want to go too, I think it would be a beneficial move for you all.

You would be able to build up gardening clients again in Wales, depending on the size of the village. Where in Wales roughly would it be?

Thank you for your reply. Not far from Abergavenny, Newport area is also not too far away. We just worry about making enough money to live on, but it is one of the cheapest rents in the UK.

We are also worried about our dd. She will leave city life for a small valleys village. She has an English accent, but family have told us that wouldn't really matter these days.

OP posts:
RockLobsterRockLobster · 01/07/2026 13:04

I think it sounds that one the whole, your family would benefit from moving to Wales, especially as your husband has family there. If the children want to go too, I think it would be a beneficial move for you all.

You would be able to build up gardening clients again in Wales, depending on the size of the village. Where in Wales roughly would it be?