Should I dump my boyfriend because he won't stop eating crisps?

Oh. Now I see. But your traditional values are a wee bit one-sided, are they not? Why should he use the washing machine, if he's providing for you? I have a fairly conservative/ "traditional" lifestyle myself. I don't disagree that while I'm growing, birthing, and bringing up babies, my husband should be earning enough to support us, and I'd be pretty pissed off if he wanted to split any "parental leave" equally too. On the other hand, although he knows how to use a washing machine I don't expect him to actually use it very often, because that's my job.

You sound like you're using "traditional values" as a euphemism for laziness and avarice. And you also sound a bit controlling, and a bit disgusted by your boyfriend. Neither of which, by the way, would be considered "traditional" among any of the women, or men, I know.

It would give me the ick too! Tell him and give him a chance to change if he wants to.

You don’t seem to like him very much, so you’re not unreasonable for dumping him.

I do think you need to have a think about what actually matters for the long term - spend a bit of time on mumsnet and it becomes very obvious that finding a man who will be a good dad and supportive husband is not a given, and a tolerating a few packets of crisps might be a small price to pay.

@Spicyseniorita7 I'm not meaning to be horrible here, but it just sounds like you don't really find him very attractive, but you're at the stage of life where you'd like to settle down so are trying to convince yourself to overlook it!

I'd end things with him - there will be something better out there for you!

@Spicyseniorita7 you've used the word 'disgusting' in one form or another four times in your first post. That, plus he's 'not bad looking' and 'never allows me to pay for anything'. For his sake, please break up with him. He can eat what he likes, and hopefully get himself a girlfriend who isn't disgusted by him but thinks his money is a consideration. Poor man.

This. All of this.

What the fuck, it is like we are actually going backwards.

If you really do want some sort of tradwife relationship then definitely don’t move in with him before you are married! Why would you even consider it? You’d be providing all the “wife” services for free with no security or protection for the future.

Are you happy to cook for him, clean for him, pick up his crisp packets, and gently try to encourage him to eat vegetables for the rest of your life? In which case crack on. If not maybe have a rethink about what you are looking for in a relationship.

At least he tried crisps in a different country! Ha.
If you are going off him, you're going off him, no matter the reason, you're allowed to and don't have to justify it. However, don't set up home together after 7 months, that's insanity and more disturbing than the way he eats crisps...

'Tis another self-entitled, modern day brat thread.

The only red flag here is -you-. I hope he runs a mile. Snowflake.

It's the "unsophisticated crisps" though 😂

Leave the poor man and find someone who eats kettle chips

Op I thoroughly enjoyed your post. You write so articulately about crisps.

This made me chortle 😁

Tell him it's making you feel like you can't be with him and see if he's willing to stop, or at least be less gross about eating them. If not there's no way you're going to live with this 3 times a day forever, is there?

Same here! Not being able to eat random food doesn’t make someone a bad person!

Fish and chips may be traced back 500 years to Portugal and Sephardic Jewish cuisine.

It’s an incompatibility issue 🤷‍♀️ Some women would be fine with that.

I started reading this thinking you were crazy but this man is unhygienic and rude. You are definitely not being unreasonable. Get rid of him.

This. I also can't abide people who judge those who won't try unfamiliar foods like it's any of their fucking business.

YANBU for not wanting to be in a relationship with someone who has crisp dust all over their fingers/nails and doesn’t know how to look after themselves properly (cleaning up after themselves, cooking and using the washing machine).

YABU for saying kettle chips are “socially acceptable” compared to other crisps 😂

This isn’t a crisps issue, it’s a maturity and hygiene issue.

Not being clean, shoving crisp packets down the sofa, not washing hands, smelling like crisps, being immature with blowing up and exploding the bags are the real issues.

That makes sense.

If I was with someone who wanted to try all different foods etc I would realise we were completely incompatible and, rather than be looked down upon (as a limited palate seems to be a reflection on someone’s maturity in MN land), I would dump them.

OP - do you think there may be a reason you have had to go on so many disastrous dates in the past? Could it be that you come across as high maintenance? I only ask because it’s unusual to be that offended at having to pay for things.

It’s fine to have standards of course. But if the money is a dealbreaker then you are reducing the field of potential partners quite significantly.

Yes this. You’ve phrased it as being about crisps but to me that’s not the biggest issue. I love trying new foods and going to different restaurants etc, especially on holiday. So if that was something he didn’t want to do, especially after a discussion about it, then yeah in the bin from me

What stands out for me is that the best you can say about him is that he "is kind and not bad looking". If, at this stage, you are not finding him completely wonderful and irresistible, then do both of you a favour and end things now. The crisp thing (whilst it would annoy me too) is secondary to the attraction and chemistry that seems to be lacking. Just because he pays for everything when you go out, doesn't mean that he's long term material for you (or you for him).

The fact you care/this bothers you, means he isn't the one. I think if you really love being with someone, especially in the under 12 month honeymoon period, you find then endlessly adorable, and chips eating wouldn't put you off. You're maybe self sabotaging or, more likely, you're just not that into him and you're inventing reasons to let him go when he hasn't actually done anything wrong. Either way, I'd listen to what your subconscious is telling you, because in a years time it'll drive you absolutely insane.